Baileysbro
No one called me or dropped by to see how I was doing. When they did drop by it was to discuss other matters but no one mentioned Bailey and no one asked if I was OK.  My mother called and she didn't mention Bailey, she was concerned about other matters.  I don't really understand people. So when I'm around them I have to pretend I'm OK. 

I'm glad for this forum otherwise I would be a lone is my grief.
Bailey
October 31, 2002 - April 19, 2016 10:25 P.M.
My best friend, my companion, my love

[e8de4bc1-77ae-4da2-9834-109b68b6cda8]

[Paws-for-the-News-Grieving-the-loss-of-a-pet] 
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Bailey15
Hi Baileysbro,
Oh, I am so sorry to hear that. Sometimes people just don't get it and it's sad because they are missing out on knowing such pure, unconditional love that we were fortunate enough to have found. I know it must be so painful though when people don't even ask about Bailey. My Bailey passed in November and fortunately our family and friends were supportive and it was still so very devastating. However, one night a friend said "Why don't you just get another dog? If it was me I'd get one the next day." (They don't have a dog or cat.) My husband told her it wasn't like replacing a refrigerator or stove. I was disappointed but realized she is the one who is missing out. Having said all that, I feel so badly that you are not getting the support you need and deserve at this difficult time. Your Bailey was so important to you. I'm glad you found this forum because we really do all understand and can really sympathize with what you are going through!
I love the picture of your Bailey on your posts.
So sorry for what you are going through!
MJ
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Sampson
I agree. That is just miserable. What is wrong with people? As MJ said we all understand and feel your pain so you are not alone with this. Take it easy bro.
S.
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Baileysbro
I just have to accept that people including my family who are after all people, are like that.  They knew Bailey, Bailey knew them.  That is how they are. I know all the crying in the world, all the dark days I'm having isn't going to bring Bailey back to me.  I am missing him so much just as all on this forum are missing their friends.  Today is Day 6 and Tomorrow is Day 7, the one week anniversary of Bailey's passing. 
Bailey
October 31, 2002 - April 19, 2016 10:25 P.M.
My best friend, my companion, my love

[e8de4bc1-77ae-4da2-9834-109b68b6cda8]

[Paws-for-the-News-Grieving-the-loss-of-a-pet] 
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et61
I'm so sorry. I'm thankful for this forum as well as it has really helped me. I got a card from my twin sister and she understood. I haven't told the rest of my family but a lot of people think they are "just a cat" or "just a dog". To us, they are more and that's why we are here for each other. I have no one else to talk to about my Sweetie. My husband is sympathetic to a point but can't understand why 3 weeks later I'm still crying. He is an animal lover like me, but is not as emotional about our animals. It hurts sometimes that he is not for understanding at how much I love Sweetie and how much I miss him. May you find some comfort here.
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Baileysbro
My family always thought I was weird because I loved animals.  They like animals.  My mother always had cats and we've had a menagerie.  But they also think that animals are "JUST" and I cannot stand it. To me, their souls are not truly awakened.

My parents always told me that animals are not equal to people, that people are more important, when I was growing up.  I did not accept that then and I do not accept that now. 

Growing up, Old Yeller, Bambi and The Yearling traumatized me.  I was devastated for weeks. Always left the movie theater crying my eyes out and wouldn't leave my room when I got home.  I could never watch movies that consisted of animals being killed or dying, even if they weren't killed or dying in reality.  Only to find out much later that yes animals do die or are injured during the making of movies  even if the AHA gives the No Animals Were Harmed thing.



Then again, for some reason I have never really been affected by the death of a person, no matter how close I am to them.  I grieve for them, but it doesn't last that long, a day or two.

Our animal family members gave us so much and asked for so little in return, well they asked for little but they claimed a lot of territory.  Sofas, floors, beds, back seats of cars etc.



Bailey
October 31, 2002 - April 19, 2016 10:25 P.M.
My best friend, my companion, my love

[e8de4bc1-77ae-4da2-9834-109b68b6cda8]

[Paws-for-the-News-Grieving-the-loss-of-a-pet] 
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JerseyNonna
baileysbro, not sure that any of us will ever understand those around us who can't see the pain and grief we are dealing with daily.  I do know I feel so sorry for them for not having that love for animals we all here seem to share, recognize and love so deeply.  perhaps they still have much to learn from lives lived and perhaps at some point they will get there and in a light bulb moment think "oh, this is what I've been missing for so long and how wonderful it feels to be unconditionally loved by such a loving animal".  perhaps we've all just attained a certain phase of enlightenment where we know a soul is a soul whether it be in a human or animal.  another reason for family or friends not saying anything could be for fear of saying the wrong thing and making us even more sad than we are already.  it's kinder for me to think this last thought than to think they are just uncaring people who just don't understand the true deep love between human and animals can be as spiritual as it is.  most of all I feel so sorry that there are humans going about their day without ever experiencing the deep bond that those of us here have been blessed to share.  I know God loves all his creations so perhaps those of us here are the lucky ones in the end to have been chosen as caregivers and guardians to his most loved creatures.  in the end I believe others fail to speak to us of our loss because many just don't know what to say and feel awkward.  I just hope callous humans manage to keep thoughts to themselves and not utter harsh words on any of us.  many many hugs to all
JerseyNonna
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winstonsmom12
You are not alone in that Baileysbro.  No one in my family ever mentions Winston either.  My kids don't understand at all.  My neighbors mention Winston when they see me out walking my new pup Peanut.  I keep my grief in my heart.


And in this forum.  Sue
Susan
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Evie123
I found a similar response, unless I actually brought up the subject it was just life as normal for everyone else. I hope it was because they didn't want to upset me and in a lot of cases it probably was but for some they just didn't even think about it. So glad we have here where we can express how we feel in the company of true pet lovers. Xx
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Baileysbro
I've accepted it.  Susan that is awful your kids don't mention Winston who loved them and probably greeted them when they came to visit. 

I mention Bailey all the time.  Bailey didn't start out to be my dog in the beginning, he was given to my father for Christmas one year after my brother was given his brother Rex.  When my brother brought over Rex as a puppy, he was so cute, my mother then decided to give a puppy to my father.  They come from the same letter both have papers etc, purebred Goldens but they look very different, where Rex was shorter and bulky, Bailey was taller and slender, my father took Bailey everywhere with him when he was a pup, then that stopped and he started to leave Bailey at home, I then started to take Bailey with me everywhere so he wouldn't be a lone. 

Bailey was a very energetic dog, full of life and loved to run and play, very enjoyable company, he loved to greet people.  Bailey wasn't allowed to be in the room when company came over for the holidays and was always put in the garage and that bothered the heck out of me, so I would take Bailey out of the garage and not participate in the company including holidays.  If Bailey or the cats weren't allowed to be around then I wasn't going to be either.  Bailey would jump around and be all excited at first then calm down after he said hello.  They didn't wait for that. 

My father was an animal abuser when I was growing up, he was terrible to my dog Poochie, I found he punched her, he was an awful person. 

It isn't so much not asking how I'm doing, but trying to force this, "JUST" belief/philosophy on me that I cannot and will not ever accept. 
Bailey
October 31, 2002 - April 19, 2016 10:25 P.M.
My best friend, my companion, my love

[e8de4bc1-77ae-4da2-9834-109b68b6cda8]

[Paws-for-the-News-Grieving-the-loss-of-a-pet] 
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Eddiesmom
I'm sorry.  People generally are selfish.  I have a chronic illness, you'd be amazed how people ignore it yet if someone has the flu oh my goodness they get meals and sympathy...but someone who deals with illness that never goes away, yawn.    I prefer dogs to humans.  Dogs always seem to understand and they are always there for you, people...not so much.  

Bailey was beautiful, you had an amazing life together...you feel incomplete now.  I'm so sorry...nothing but time.  Luckily we live in the time of the internet and we can reach across the miles for others who understand and there is comfort in that.  I cannot imagine if I didn't have this forum, it has been so helpful and justified my grief.

Hugs,
Sue
Sue E
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Baileysbro
Yes, this forum is great.
Bailey
October 31, 2002 - April 19, 2016 10:25 P.M.
My best friend, my companion, my love

[e8de4bc1-77ae-4da2-9834-109b68b6cda8]

[Paws-for-the-News-Grieving-the-loss-of-a-pet] 
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Tazzy
hi, I just wanted to say that i completely understand where you're coming from
literally the day my dog died, my mom tried to get my to watch a move with her to help get my mind off of the death, but she just doesn't understand 
i feel like no one but my dad and I really care about the dog's death (I mean he was willing to pay $10,000 for her surgery) and it's just really upsetting to see that kind of apathy 
"Sometimes when someone or something you love dies, you just have to be happy they ever even existed" -Mara Wilson 

love you forever and always
R.I.P. Taz
2010-2016
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Meekosmommy
Oh my! I feel the same way. My boyfriend doesn't understand one bit. He thinks I'm over reacting and looking for attention. So I have to act like I'm fine around him which is all the time.. it's super hard. When I feel sad about it and like I need to vent I call my mom.
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