You're so welcome! It came to me in one of those, "Come *on*, Susie -- he was a *cat!*" moments. The guy who said it to me was a fan of my husband's band, and he said it at the first show I was able to attend after we lost our little Buddy Guy kitty in 2004.
It struck me as odd, because he had always called the band voice mail, which I recorded every week, and he would always comment on that week's message. I had to record a new message each week, and I had to get it right in one take. Yeah. That never happened. Buddy was an extremely talkative little Bengal Cat and he couldn't stand the thought of my talking to no one, so he would chime in with his constant commentary. lol
I usually had to try over and over and over again to get through the list of shows, showtimes, and venue locations without messing up, More often than not, I would end up locking buddy outside the room while I recorded the message. More often than not, i could hear Buddy through the door, and so could anyone who was calling the VM. It was always pretty hilarious, and Ed (the guy who made the comment) would always wait and leave us a message, usually saying hi to Buddy.
Ed and his wife had visited our home a few times, and they had met Buddy and his Uncle T.J., and they loved them, so I thought it was curious that he didn't understand the depth of my sorrow. When I asked him to be patient with me, he softened and apologized for what he had said.
It was then that I understood that people don't mean to be cruel when they say such things. They just don't understand.
I'm comforted to know that it helped you to see a different way of approaching this painful subject.