We lost Molly the Beagle on 11/2/16 after having her grace our lives for almost 17 years. Her 17th birthday was 11/25/16. Although her health and eyesight were failing, she was deaf, and she had trouble moving around, we were quite oblivious to these changes as they occurred. We adapted, made her comfortable, and continued taking her with us on all our activities. She had a pet stroller for walks and special blankets in the car for a comfortable ride. Our neighbors and walk acquaintances knew us as "Molly's parents". She was our identity. We knew the dreaded decision was coming at some point, but I think we were in denial it would be anytime soon. Here we are 4 weeks later, and the grief, guilt and pain are still as strong as they were on that dreadful day. My husband and I cry constantly. Not sure if we are sad mostly for ourselves, or mostly for her not being here with us as she so much enjoyed just being close and included. I feel like she can no longer do that, and it makes me sad. We have not been able to move any of her beds, which are in every room, or her food and water bowls, or even her food and treats. I can't vacuum. She was with us through our daughter's middle and high school years, college, wedding, and now two beautiful grandsons. I hope in time we are able to better cope with such a tremendous loss as the wonderful people on this site say will eventually happen. We never want to forget her and will honor her forever as she did for us.
I am so, so sorry for the loss of your beautiful Molly, the photos of her are absolutely gorgeous, what a beautiful girl, I can see how loving her would be so easy.
The words you wrote above could have been my exact words, they actually brought tears to my eyes as there are so many similarities. After almost two years, I still refill Bella's water bowl and put ice in it, just the way she loved her water, and boy, did she ever let me know if I forgot the ice, so I continue to do that today, I can't explain why I do, but I do and it gives me comfort doing so and that is what we need to do right now.....anything thing that brings us comfort and can somehow help us heal, no matter how crazy it may seem to others, you and your husband do what you need to do. Like you, I also have everything of Bella's still where they were, they are her things, they were there for the whole time, maybe in time I will move them, put them away, but not right now, so there is no rush to put Molly's things away Dawn, no rush at all, this will take time, only you will know when that time has arrived, so don't let anyone else try to tell you it is time.
It is obvious from your words above that Molly was and still is so loved, you provided her such comfort especially when she aged, such a beautiful and loving way you took care of her, making sure to provide her with the comfort so she could always be with you. I chuckled at how you mentioned that you and your husband were known as "Molly's parents", every where I went, Bella went, and when we saw these people again, they always remembered her name but never mine and you know what Dawn, I didn't care in the least, the fact they remembered her name gave me so much pleasure and I am sure it is the same for you and your husband.
Four weeks is so fresh and the pain so raw for you both still, it takes time Dawn, let your husband know that it is ok to cry, to hurt, to miss your precious girl, as men, it can be unfair that we are expected to be strong, but how can we when we lost such a loving and so important part of our lives, so let him know he has my support and complete understanding.
I sincerely wish that the many loving and cherished moments you and your husband shared with your beautiful Molly, will help mend your shattered hearts, but as I mentioned Dawn, it does take time, so no need to rush or push yourself. Talk to your girl, let her know how much you love her and that your love is stronger than ever, it is a beautiful thing that our love for our girls grows even stronger as time goes by, so always talk to Molly, she is ready and always listening for your voice.
I am so, so sorry for your loss, Molly is one beautiful girl, you gave her a wonderful life and I am so sure she enhanced your lives so much more. May the warm and loving memories of your gorgeous Molly bring the peace and healing your hearts and souls deserve, hold her close to your heart and you will always feel her love.
Thank you so much for your wonderful and touching words on Bella's thread, I truly appreciate that you took the time to write, especially so early in your own grieving, please stay in touch and do know that you are in my thoughts as you stumble along this road, we are all here together, so anytime you need to talk or just need someone to listen, come here and let one of us help you the best we can. This place is full of the most wonderful people you will ever meet and we all understand the pain you are in.....unfortunately.
In Friendship, Don.