EF924687
Ruger was attacked by another dog on Friday. My husband found him in our yard barely alive and suffering. He rushed to the door with him and sobbed. We didn’t think he was breathing. We didn’t know what to do. Finally he took a breath and I told my husband to rush him to the emergency vet that was 30 minutes away. I called the vet and got our 7 month old in his car seat and left shortly after. By the Grace of God Ruger held on. The vet stablilized him and strarted pain medication. We got to visit with him before we left. He looked so pitiful and hurt, but things seemed hopeful. The vet thought he would make it. My husband and I didn’t know this would be the last time that we would ever see him. The next morning we got a call from the vet saying that Ruger was doing better. He had even gotten to walk outside. Our minds were at ease. We thought we would be picking him up on Sunday. Sunday morning the vet called and told us that our sweet Ruger passed away during the night. We do not know why it happened, but we suspect it was from the trauma. He was such a special dog and I am consumed with guilt. If only I had been outside with him maybe this wouldn’t have happened. Maybe if I had found him Sooner he could’ve been saved. Maybe if I had taken him to another vet things would be different. My husband was especially attached to him and I hate seeing him so upset. We both are so broken over this. I hate knowing that he suffered this way. He wasn’t even 2 years old. We thought we hadn’t so much time left with him. We thought he’d be with us to watch our child grow up. Ruger was our first baby. He was with us through so many big transitions in life. He was there when we got married and had our child. He had such a unique and quirky personality. He is irreplaceable. I’m tired of crying, but I can’t help myself. I feel so powerless. I wish there were something I could do to change this. I hope and pray that heaven is real and that he is there waiting on us. Nothing will ever replace Ruger. We miss him so very much.
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anniesdad
The "what ifs" are the most painful part, I believe.  I am dealing with this myself right now.  My Annie passed away Saturday night and its so hard to not blame ourselves.  You did not do anything wrong.  It sounds like you were doing everything you thought was right for Ruger, and that's all we can do.  I wish you peace.  It sounds like Ruger was dearly loved, and in the end I think that's what matters most.
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EF924687
I am so sorry for your loss. The what if’s are the hardest part. Life can be so unfair. I am wishing you comfort during this difficult time. I understand how much it hurts.
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Purzel
Emilee,

I am so so sorry about the tragic und unexpected loss of your sweet Ruger. You see, accidents like this can just happen and they happen ever so often. Whilst Max was still alive he could have been attacked by some crazy dog or some car could have hit him when he ran away - even tho we guarded him very well just like you did with Ruger accidents could have still happened at any time. What I am trying to say here is that you did nothing wrong, you did your very best taking him to the emergency vet and there was hope meaning here that also the vet tried his best to save Ruger's life .... it just did not work out.

Max was unguarded in the backyard ever so often, he did run away from me ever so often when he was young, he crossed main roads unguarded .... you know, all kinds of things could have happened and we certainly cannot know what the next day or next minute holds for us even tho we do try our very best. My neighbor's dog was attacked in her yard by the dog accross the road when she was standing next to the fighting dogs. Luckily her dog survived but she could not have done anything whilst the dogs were seriously fighting.

I am sure you did everything right, I am sure you could not have done any better than you did - you loved him and I am also sure Ruger knew just that. The time he was with you he had a wonderful life with everything a dog can only wish for.

The guilt seems to belong to the grieving process - most of us feel this way. Give yourself some time to grieve, things will ease as time goes.

It is good you came here to this safe place, we will listen and dry your tears.

My heart goes out to you
Silvia (with Max forever in my heart)

[hundi]


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EF924687
Thank you for your kind words. I’m so sorry for the loss of your sweet Max. Ruger’s passing was so unexpected and I think that’s what makes it so hard. My husband and I are thankful for the time we had with him before he passed, but we still feel like we didn’t get to say a proper goodbye because we didn’t expect him to pass. The guilt I’m feeling is so complex. I think part of it stems from having a baby recently, and I know that Ruger’s life changed a lot once we welcomed our son home. He no longer slept in the bed with us, and I hate to admit that I did not give him as much attention when I was so consumed with new motherhood. His passing also symbolizes to me a loss of the less complicated and more carefree life that my husband and I once had with Ruger before we became parents.
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EF924687
I am having a hard time tonight. I’ve gotten to the point where I have a general feeling of sadness, but I can’t cry to get relief anymore. My husband is asleep and my friends are tired of hearing me repeat the same things over and over. I feel so drained and negative. I cannot believe that Ruger is gone now. I don’t want to accept it. I wish there were a way to take my mind off of this.
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anniesdad
I know how badly it can hurt and it seems like night time is the worst. I pray you can find peace and rest one day at a time.
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