5 days ago I left my 2 cats and dog in the care of my fiancee's mom at our home.  She often house and animal sits for us when we are away.  This time my 3 year old cat Violet got out of the house (the details of this are unclear).  His mom then proceeded to let the dogs out into the yard where they went into pack mode and mauled Violet.  We took her to the emergency room and she was released the next day to my care.  Tuesday she took a turn for the worse and the vet said she wasn't getting better and she was filling with fluid, her kidneys failing. She couldn't walk.  She was wheezing.  We had to put my beloved Violet to sleep and I'm broken.  I am angry.  I can't look at the dog, I have so much anger and grief and I miss her little face.  i failed Violet.  I didn't protect her.  She wasn't an outside cat.  I appreciate any guidance at all in how to get through this.  Please.
Stacy Elles
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I am so sorry about your pet, Violet. I don't understand why these things have to happen. I lost my little dog three weeks ago under tragic, sudden circumstances so I know how you are feeling. I also feel a lot of guilt and am obsessing about how I could have prevented it from happening. I am finally at the point where I am not having a meltdown on a daily basis, but it is still hard. I have put together a photo book of Lulu and it is helping to get some of the horrible images out of my mind. Again, I am so sorry. I understand you being mad at the dogs, I would have a hard time too. :( Hang in there, it is so hard when our pets leave us. As time goes on it may be a bit easier to think of the good memories rather than how she passed away. Hugs.  
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Dear Stacy,

Oh sweetheart, I am so, so sorry and saddened to read of what happened to your Violet and the pain and suffering you are enduring now with her loss.

A similar thing happened to me about 32 years ago. We had a black Himalayan cat named "Cosmos" who I adored and had raised since he was a kitten that could fit in my hand. He was around 3 years old. He came to live with me at a sound stage I was living and working at on an industrial island called Terminal Island located in between San Pedro and Long Beach, Ca., that we used as a location for Films / TV / Music Videos and Commercials etc.

The building was fenced in and was quite large @ 43,000 square feet and our three cats (Cosmos, Tiffany and Dusty) had the run of the place. Cosmos snuck out of the building via a hole near a fire extinguishing system pipe and disappeared one morning. I went to look for him and couldn't find him. He vanished. A few hours later a business neighbor who saw me looking for my cat told me he had thrown a cats body into the dumpster at his place of business and sure enough, it was Cosmos. He had been attacked and killed by 2 wild dogs. They not only killed Cosmos, they killed my other neighbors beloved dog too. 

I carried Cosmos, my little boy, to the shop of our stage and built him a small wood coffin, as I balled my eyes out. I couldn't even speak to my staff I was so overwhelmed with grief and sorrow. I lined the coffin with white satin material left over from a production, and then painted the coffin's exterior black. And then painted in multi-colors stars, planets, galaxies and anomalies etc. for my Cosmos. I gently placed him inside the little coffin and screwed it shut.

We took the coffin carrying Cosmos down the way to a secluded beach front on Terminal Island. We buried him and I said a prayer.

A few nights later we went back to visit "C" as I had called him and the entire area had been completely fenced off. I couldn't get to Cosmos burial site. I walked a bit to try and find an entrance and noticed a sign. "BIRD SANCTUARY. DO NOT ENTER BY ORDER OF U.S. GOVERNMENT." Cosmos LOVED watching birds. Back to the days of his kittenhood. I could not think of a more fitting locale for his final resting place. A slight smile crossed my face.

Although the above occurred over 32 years ago, and my memories are fading, I still think of my little boy at times and recall the love and good times Cosmos and I shared together. I am glad our paths crossed when they did. He enriched my life in so many ways. As your Violet obviously enriched yours.

All you can do now Stacy is continue to travel through time and allow your mind and bodies built-in healing system to do it's work. It will. And "this too shall pass."

Kind regards & my sincerest condolences,
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