I woke up this morning thinking that I would hear Luna outside my window. For a moment, I thought that I would hear her bark and the sound of her collar jingling around as she ran around the yard. Then I remembered that I will never get to hear or pet her ever again. Yesterday morning she was here, happy and healthy, and now she isn’t. Last night, I couldn’t process the severity of what happened. But today, I can. Last night, my baby escaped from our backyard and was run over by a car. My family and I were completely unaware that she had even escaped since we were all about to go to bed, and we found out when an officer came to tell us. She was still alive when my parents took her to an emergency vet hospital. However, my parents had to make the hard decision to put her down. “She was in really bad shape,” they told me. And she was. I know she was in pain, and I know they made the right decision. I knew that that there was a high chance that she wasn’t going to make it, so I made sure to say a simple bye to her before they took her. But I can’t stop thinking that I should’ve been there when she passed. I wish that I had been able to give her my last final goodbye. That’s all I’ve been thinking about today. I’m overcome with guilt and sadness right now. I know that eventually, the pain of losing a beloved pet subsides. I know that one day I will be able to look at videos or pictures of her without breaking down, but right now, it hurts. It was completely unexpected, and it hurts.
I just wanted a safe place to express my feelings and share with people who understand. I wanted to know how people cope with this type of loss. The unexpected kind. I have lost furbabies before, but never like this. Any advice or even own experiences with this type of loss are greatly appreciated.