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Susie_Squillions

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Posts: 947
Reply with quote  #1 
Oh, my Beautiful Baby Boy ~

It's a tough day for me. I slept with my little T.J. doll last night, holding him close to my heart.

You earned your wings two weeks ago today at 1:50 PM (now 2:50 PM with daylight savings time).  Two weeks ago right now, we were getting ready to go to the clinic to say our goodbyes and release you to the angels, and you and I were preparing to pose for our final pictures together.  I will treasure those pictures as long as I live.

Thank you for the gifts of love and pure happiness you gave us for 16 years, 4 months and 2 weeks (almost to the minute). Every single minute of that time was a joy ~ even when we yelled at you and called you "Dammit" because you were so noisy.  I would do anything to hear your beautiful voice again, and to hold you in my arms.

Today I give you an angel, just like I did two weeks ago when I had to release you to the angels.

Soft tears are gently falling today, mingling with the rain.

You will always be the Heart of My Heart.  "You're my Sweet Baboo, my Main Boogaloo, you're my Big Red Roo, T.J.  I love you!"  I told you that a squillion times a day when you were here, and I have continued to say it to you since you took flight two weeks ago.  I know you hear my words, and you soar around me forever through time and space.  We are one.

I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always. As long as I'm living, your momcat I'll be.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

__________________
My heart is battered and bruised, but I will not let it break. It holds such precious cargo, I must protect it now. (Susie Squillions)

"Memories of loved ones are like songs in our soul." Margaret Wakeley

T.J.'S RESIDENCY:
http://RainbowsBridge.com/residents/TJ006/Resident.htm

BUDDY GUY AYRES~LYNCH'S RESIDENCY:
http://www.rainbowsbridge.com/residents/Buddy128/resident.HTM

KING BING THE GOD CAT'S RESIDENCY:
http://rainbowsbridge.com/residents/BINGO009/Resident.htm

In one of the stars, I shall be living.
In one of them, I shall be laughing.
And so it will be as if all the stars were laughing when you look at the sky at night.
~ The Little Prince, Antoine de Saint-Exupery
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nicokudo

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Posts: 363
Reply with quote  #2 
Ah Susie,

These first few weeks without our beautiful babies are so difficult. Even though in our minds we know that they are safe, happy and healthy now, the physical loss is so hard. 

Your beautiful boy hears everything that you say to him; the bond between you will always be so strong.  I found peace when Nico died just knowing that he was with Kudo.  Your big, talkative, screaming(in Buddy's case) boys are all together now, staying close to you during these painful days. 

My heartfelt wishes for a few happy moments today.

Karen


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Karen,Kudo and Nico's mom
Earth mom to Marco and Bella
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Susie_Squillions

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Posts: 947
Reply with quote  #3 
Thank you, Karen.

I should have expected this week to hit me hard.  The 2nds always do for some reason.  As I just wrote to Tonya:

This is such a hard day for me.  I had to sleep with my little stuffed kitty that I bought a few years ago because it looked so much like T.J.  I just had to hold his likeness close to my heart all night long.

Before I went to bed last night, I went to T.J.'s little hidey-hole in the office closet where he always liked to nap.  It's where he spent his last few nights because it wasn't safe for him to get on the big bed any more.  Stevie sleeps there now, but not where Teege did.  T.J. always snuggled in between the layers of fabric.  I pulled back the top layer and lay my head where he had slept so well in his last few days.  The fabric is coated with a fine layer of his fur, and I pressed my nose into it and recalled the wonderful scent of his warm tummy, the steady heartbeat, and the rumbling purr that always calmed me and soothed my worst fears.  Then I went to bed and fell asleep thanking him for being my special boy, and for choosing me as his forever momcat. 

All of those things brought me comfort, but nothing will ever compare with the joy I will feel when I see him again.  I hold fast to the knowledge that when that day comes, it will feel as if we were never apart.  We are one forever and always.  I know my angels will be there to greet me when my time comes, and I will finally get to meet so many special, wonderful Bridge Kids, all of the ones who were in my cloud parade last summer.

Love drops are falling today, and my smiles are shining through.  It's creating a rainbow in my heart, just like the sun shining through raindrops.

xoxoxoxoxoxo



__________________
My heart is battered and bruised, but I will not let it break. It holds such precious cargo, I must protect it now. (Susie Squillions)

"Memories of loved ones are like songs in our soul." Margaret Wakeley

T.J.'S RESIDENCY:
http://RainbowsBridge.com/residents/TJ006/Resident.htm

BUDDY GUY AYRES~LYNCH'S RESIDENCY:
http://www.rainbowsbridge.com/residents/Buddy128/resident.HTM

KING BING THE GOD CAT'S RESIDENCY:
http://rainbowsbridge.com/residents/BINGO009/Resident.htm

In one of the stars, I shall be living.
In one of them, I shall be laughing.
And so it will be as if all the stars were laughing when you look at the sky at night.
~ The Little Prince, Antoine de Saint-Exupery
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Bob

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Posts: 18
Reply with quote  #4 
I know how you feel. Even though it has been far more than two weeks since Mr. Ike went to the Rainbow Bridge each day still has many painful moments and some many tears. You ahve been a great help to me with all you kindness and understanding. I wish I could be as supportive as you have been. Please know I do understand and will pray for you and T.J. I am slowly coming to believe that someday I will be reunited with Mr. Ike. But till then my heart will have an empty space nothing can fill.
Warmest regards.
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niki

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Posts: 136
Reply with quote  #5 
hello Susie
i just read your message and i understand how you feel, i hope you are doing ok
it was 5 weeks for me that little Mint passed on,
I am findin sundays very hard, she passed on that day but also it was our day and we called it "Chicken day", she had a roast for all her life, we used to joke it was her roast and we could share it, she was crazy over roast chicken
i said to her on her lasy few days that i would not and could not eat chicken for one year after she went, i made a pact with her!!
I cant face a chicken, i was always buying chicken for her, she was a "CHICKAHOLIC" , si i cannot walk up the poultry aisle in shops withoiut  a lump in my throat..........
Ocelot is a beef girl so we have that now, but the pain is still there, sometimes days are worse than others,
 
i understand all you say, i have some of Mints fur in a little box, it was taken from her at her scan, i love to smell it
 
it is all so painful though and i am so grateful for this place, be strong
take care
Niki xx
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Tricia

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Posts: 200
Reply with quote  #6 
Hi Susie,

Sending prayers and hugs your way. Your beautiful Angel boy T.J. is looking down and sending all his love to you.  He is just a whisper away.
He will forever live in his mommy's heart.

Love and hugs,

Tricia

Attached Images
jpeg Burtonangel.jpg (41.26 KB, 2 views)
jpeg OZZIEANGEL.jpg (36.49 KB, 2 views)


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Tricia, Burton&Ozzie's Mom

"Good night sweet prince:And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest!"
William Shakespere's Hamlet

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harli1999

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Posts: 12
Reply with quote  #7 

Susie, your post made me cry, laugh and smile.  I am sorry it was another hard day. 

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harli1999

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Posts: 12
Reply with quote  #8 

I wanted to say too, that I sleep w/ Harli's squeaky toy bear every night and since I work out of the home, I keep it on my lap all day when I work.  I have had sinus stuff going on for the past few days and I am sad that I can't smell her stinky self on the squeaky bear right now.

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