mars8131
I came across this site/forum in googling grieving the loss of a pet, sometimes I feel like I'm crazy for having these ongoing emotions and just not being able to let go. Our Bernese Mountain dog, Cassie, had her life cut short on Tuesday, 8/9/16, she just turned six in June. One day mid June we had noticed that she wasn't eating, we usually kept her bowl full as she always ate at her own speed and schedule and never was one to devour food, she savored it, we noticed she had lost a significant amount of weight and her breath was pretty bad. We took her to the vet and they determined her liver values were off when they did blood work and referred us to another local animal hospital. Based on all of her symptoms the second visit we were advised that Cassie had Malignant Histicytosis, a very aggressive, rapid acting cancer which travels through the blood stream and attacks the organs, she told us Cassie had weeks to live and that chemo may give her a couple additional weeks. We opted out on the chemo and went home with prednisone and an antibiotic metronizadole. A couples days later Cassie began eating again, playing again, barking and eventually gaining weight, until last wed when she completely stopped altogether, the whites of her eyes became yellow, her tongue and gums yellow, so in hopes for a miracle we took her back to the vet on Tuesday only for them to say there was nothing more they could do, we couldn't stand to see her only being able to lay around all day, sad, miserable. We were going to set Cassie free on Wednesday. About 30 mins after the vet Tuesday once at home she began to breath rapidly, she stopped, then began again until it slowly began to decrease and eventually she stopped breathing, she had her dad by her side petting her head and her beagle sister as well with her tail tucked not understanding what was happening. This was devastating. Cassie is being creamated. It feels like a piece of me is empty, although we have her companion here, the house is quiet, I keep looking at the spots where she laid all the time just hoping she would be there, smelling the blanket she laid on with me sometimes, I miss her personality and her company and just her overall she was he biggest fluffy teddy bear, I wish I knew when the hurt would go away and I never thought I would grieve the loss of a pet to this magnitude. Things just aren't the same, I'm glad I came here where others may understand my pain.
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Sasha_RIP
I'm so sorry for your loss. Cassie was a real beauty. You came to the right place - people on this site understand the grief associated with the loss of a pet. I lost my Sasha almost a year ago. Sasha was my best friend and I was devastated when I had to make the decision to let her go. I thought I would grieve and just get over it after a while -- didn't happen. There's also the guilt you feel - maybe there was something else I could have done, which is normal. The thing that made it easier for me was when I adopted a senior rescue dog. It wasn't to replace Sasha but to give another dog a chance at some happiness. That's what has made the difference for me. I also considered volunteering at a shelter. I rescued Sasha and I think she would be happy that I've rescued another dog who needed rescuing. My advice is give yourself some time to grieve; be patient with the process. Hugs.
Sasha's Mom
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RobertandJack
Yes there all many of us who understand and grieve.  We can say things and give advice but mostly we can just let all who come to  this place know that we all feel the loss in such a profound way.  Peace to you.  I hope you find comfort at this site.  I have.  

For one more day

Robert and Jacks Mom
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mars8131
Thank you for the kind responses, I think getting our other dog a companion will happen eventually, I think what contributes a lot is I was supposed to be off work for 18 days in a row and something fell through Tuesday, and that ONE day was the day i worked, I was gone two hours after I left for work and she left us, I remember patting her head before I left telling her I would see her later. I'm thankful she isn't hurting anymore and I really hope she knew how much she was loved. I'm sorry about the loss of my responders pets, I feel better knowing I'm not being ridiculous by grieving over a pet
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Lizzy12
Cassie was such a beautiful lady and I'm sure she knows you loved her very much. You just lost her a few days ago, you're not crazy to be going through all these emotions at all. I just lost my cat Pauly Wednesday and my heart feels shattered. I hope snuggling her blankets helps. I know I've been sleeping with Pauly's favorite blanket. He passed away while at the vet when he stopped breathing, but when he was gone the vet wrapped him up in the blanket and I got to hold him for a while. I guess it sounds morbid but it brings me an enormous amount of comfort. It's weird how grief affects us and I know you're hurting deeply because you cared so much for Cassie, but you have to hold on to all the wonderful times you had together. I told my cat I would see him later too... it's a tough memory to get over, but hopefully it eases in time. I hope coming here and talking helps a bit.
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