Missubbyboy
I didn't know it would be this hard missing you. Only two mornings ago, I could easily check my email, and try to get you to eat after another 30 minutes at work: another reminder that we were making a choice, a compassionate choice to say goodbye. But now, I hate it. We put you down yesterday, and I've plummeted. I can barely get out of bed. I've been running through how today would run if I had you here. That I'd walk downstairs to find you resting in your bed, maybe licking your paws. I'd run my hand over your back to let you know I was there since you are now poor of sight and hearing. I hate that I want to hold you, and you're not here. I miss you.

For half of your life, I've been at school and developing into a young professional. I've been looking back through photos trying to pull out all that I have left of you, and am annoyed at myself for not being around more often. I am guilt ridden at every photo I have at a meaningless party, drunk with now strangers, and not with you. Baby boy, I miss you.

Why didn't I take you with me to my developing life? I knew I could provide you with cuddles that my parents rarely did. But I didn't because I wanted to party, sleep in, and "focus on my studies". Selfish me. But I can't be too hard on myself. I loved you then, and missed you while I was away. But it doesn't even compare to how I miss you now. I miss you, entirely.

How long will it take for me to stop replaying yesterday in my head. Having you smiling, panting as we ate our last breakfast with you. And how we were crowded around you all with a hand petting your warm, soft fur. I wanted to hold you again, but my sister said you'd just be a limp body. Let me hold you again. I miss you Charlie.

I will never get another dog because it is not a dog I miss. I miss you. My sweet Charlie, I miss you.
Quote 0 0
Missubbyboy
Ugh I wish I had one more day with you! You would have been here for the solar eclipse. I would have held you, and said jokingly "Look Charlie, the Eclipse" (which is a joke cause he is blind). It would have been another memory to share with my little boy before our goodbye :(
Quote 0 0
Bono1983
I know exactly how you feel! Had to put down my beloved baby 3 days ago and since then been going over and over in my head what i could have done different. I dont even want to take my scheduled leave at work because my baby wont be at home! I miss him so much. Dont feel like it will ever get better. I am so sorry to hear about your loss!
Quote 1 0
JoyAlane
God Bless you, I'm very sorry for your grief. We all make choices and than in hindsight wish they were different ones. My little Rowdy left me last August 6th,2016. For me I found a book that lifted me. "Biblical Proof Animals Go To Heaven." I believe we will see our babies again. Dob't be to hard on yourself. We are all human and hindsight is 20/20. Prayers..,
Quote 1 0
Missubbyboy
Owen, I miss you so much today. It hasn't even been a month. I've been trying to draw your face, but its hard to get your right expression.

Owen, I'm so, so sorry we put you down. I try hard not to think about the decision, because after the bout of infections, you were on the road to a recovery period. Regret. Regret. Regret. I wish we never put you down until the very end. And that I'd be with you, holding your little paw. I wish I didn't quit on you. I didn't research enough to save you from your obscure ailments. I love you so much, but why didn't I love you more.

Love is what makes life worth living, and now I have a chunk of it missing. You were the one thing I cared about more than anything else in this world, and at times, you were the reason I held myself together. As much as it hurts to miss you, I'm so happy to have had you in my life. I wouldn't have known what love and pure joy is otherwise. I miss you, Baby Owen.
Quote 0 0