Bellabanks
My bella left me two weeks ago and the world has yet to be as beautiful as it once was. She was a 15 year old to poodle and even though she only weighed in at 4.8 pounds her energy was felt as if she was a giant. I'm still so lost and confused as to how fast this all happened or why. And as the time goes on my heart breaks even more. She was truly my bestfriend, my secret keeper and a huge part of my happiness. I woke up to her and fell asleep with her my morning was always spent with her and my nights were always complete coming home to her. She brought a light not just any light a beautiful light that radiates colors and now it just seems dull. I miss her so much....
Quote 0 0
Mybeautifulboy
My condolences on your loss of sweet Bella.
Quote 0 0
Becky1990
Monique,
I am so sorry for your loss of Bella. What a beautiful girl she is! This coming Thursday it will be 8 weeks for me. It still hurts bad but it does get easier I promise. Take as long as you need to go through the greiving process. We understand the pain that you are going through. Keep writing here. That has helped me tremendously. We are here for you. Big hug, Becky
Quote 0 0
Bellabanks
Thank you @mybeautifulboy 💛

@Becky1990 thank you very much, I'm very new to this my coworker told me about it and reading all these stories are so heartbreaking yet it feel good to be understood. I'm sorry for your loss as well and I really hope you receive strength because it is very hard.💛
Quote 0 0
Becky1990
Monique,
Thank you for your kind words. We always had a poodle when I was growing up as a kid as far back as I can remember. They are so loving and sweet dogs. They were always there to give you a kiss with their wagging tail.
It has been 2 mos today since my Shemp passed away. Some days it feels like its been an eternity. I miss him greeting me at the door and sleeping with me at night. I can look back at the good times and try to honor his life now. I too pray you find comfort soon too. This site has been a blessing to me and glad it gives you comfort as well. Take care of yourself. I know that can be hard at times. Hugs, Becky
Quote 0 0
Bellabanks
Becky, Shemp is such a cute name and you are right they are loving. I miss the same things. It's even hard to go home. I'm hoping to get the comfort you have I try but it is hard, one day at a time right. Do you cry in the morning?
Quote 0 0
Memories_of_Marmalade


Dear Monique,

I am so saddened to read of your loss, and the eloquent and heartfelt words you have used in your posts here on the forum. They describe much of what many of us are feeling, experiencing and enduring. By your words your Bella was most likely your "Spirit Animal."

I too lost the light of my life just over 5 months ago. He too was the light of my life, and colored my world. And although he was a small cat, he was a titan to me in so many ways. I returned back to the warehouse he and I shared the night before last and once again broke down crying I missed him so. It is getting cold here and he and I used to like to sit in front of our little heater to warm ourselves. It was a simple little part of our daily / nightly routine that was almost like a sacred ritual. I miss it so. That simple thing.

I hope you continue to travel through time and heal. And that soon, the good and cherished times you shared with your beloved will come to the forefront of your mind, whenever you think of your sweet Bella.

Kind regards and my sincerest condolences,
James
Quote 0 0
Becky1990
Dear Monique,
Yes, I find myself crying more in the morning now because I am so use to having him near me while I drink my morning coffee. The routine of feed him first (lol,) make my coffee, make my toast then he would be by me. Please try not to be too hard on yourself. We all are at different greiving process here and it will take some time to heal. I cried this morning again. He was my rock that was always there for me. We are so lucky to have had them as long as we did. But I know it will never be enough.
Thank you for saying that Shemp is a cute name! My husband named him after the 3 Stooges character on t v . My husband was a character himself! He passed away in 2009 from Lou Gerhig's Disease. Shemp was a daddy's boy first since he found him in the back yard.
I promise in due time you will remember the happy times. That is what our babies want. They always want us to be happy. Keep posting your feelings here. We all truly care and understand the loss your feeling. 💛
Quote 0 0
mmccormick
Becky 1990,Amen!!
Quote 0 0
Pennienewman
I’m so sorry. What a beauty. I have a poodle cross and I will be devastated when she goes. I can’t even bear to think about it. I lost my pony last year and that has been and at times still is awful. You mention that she was your light. I felt this too with my pony and felt that the light had gone from my life when she died. Last week on the anniversary of her death I received a handmade solar light which does amazing things at night. I stand and look out the window at it, it feels like her lights. It’s comforting. Just wondered if you could buy a special light in her memory. Hugs x
Love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation
Author Unknown  - adapted from Kahil Gilbran

Quote 0 0
Bellabanks
Memories_of_Matmalade thank you for your kind words I to believe she was my spirit animal. I am sorry for your lost as well. Those simple things are so valued thise small moments hold such great places in time and it's hard to do them alone. 💛
Quote 0 0
Bellabanks
@Pennienewman thank you she was a beautiful soul! I'm sorry for your loss I am going to look into the light, thank u for that suggestion. 💛
Quote 0 0
Bellabanks
@ Becky1990 how did you get out of the habit of your routines? That is where I get confused because everything I did was based on her if not with her. It was just the 2 of us so it is a bit hard for me to do anything and not have a memory because she was always there. I am sorry for the loss of your husband and thank you for always being so kind 💛
Quote 0 0
Becky1990
Monique,
It only takes time to get out of the routine. I started to slowly do things differently. Instead of the morning "feed routine" I changed from sitting and drinking on the couch to drinking at the dining room table and start with my emails and coming here. I would write my feelings here. Then when that started to get me crying at first, then I would read a book. I will now go outside on my porch since we finally got cooler weather to drink my coffee. I live in Florida. Just getting outside, being in the sun, reading a book helped me. I am really trying to remember the good times now and forcing a smile sometimes and saying out loud that he wants me to smile. Glad you are here continually writing. That was the greatest help for me for the first 3 to 4 weeks. Keep strong, it will get better! 💛
Quote 0 0