Gmr
I hate night time. During the day I seem to be able to keep my mind busy but when late night comes it's so hard. It's so quiet and the sleep pattern I once had has now changed. I now dread going to bed since my baby is gone. I end up staying up late because I know she will not be there with me in bed. Thank goodness I'm retired because I would otherwise be exhausted. When I finally drag myself to bed I have to put the radio on quietly just to distract my mind from thinking. I don't sleep as soundly as before and it takes me awhile to fall asleep. Losing my baby has just affected me in so many ways. It's like you can never totally relax because you can feel that something is missing. Being winter it was always nice to have my baby near me as we waited for spring and summer to arrive. I'm already dreading those seasons because then I have to face all the places we walked together on those nice sunny and warm days. I just hate this new way of life without her here. I wish this all was just a dream.
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IvyMarley
GMR- My heart is with you and I'm sorry for your lost. I can totally relate with you in your experience. My two babies (Boston Terriers) are at peace as of this past Sunday. I find my mornings are a struggle. We had our little routine. Marley would do a back scratch then turn over and do a belly rub which looked like he was playing the piano. Ivy would follow me to kitchen waiting for a morning treat or eagerly wait for our walk. Its less than 72 hours and I find myself flipping back and forth about the decision to have both go together ( Ivy had tumor which mastesized into her lungs. Marley had nasal cancer). I'm hurting like crazy.
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Gmr
IvyMarley so sorry for your losses. It's been a little over 2 mths for me. It is so hard in the beginning but I can tell you that the pain eases some the longer you go. Then you will just have something that triggers you out of the blue. I miss my routine too. It's normal to question your decision but you sound like you made the right decision. You didn't want your babies to suffer. Allow yourself to go through the grieving. Let the tears out. I'm attaching something in another post to you for you to read. It helps me when I read it at difficult times. Hugs to you.
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BoxerMomForever
Gmr - I’m sorry, but so understand everything your saying, it’s exactly how I feel. Hugs....

IvyMarley - Oh my, I’m sorry to hear you lost two. I can’t imagine. They are no longer suffering and running around at Rainbow Bridge together. Hugs...

Linda *Mom to two boxer angels* Lily {White Girl} 6/22/09 - 10/14/19  ** Ginger {Flashy Fawn Girl} 6/4/97 - 5/28/09
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