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nikki

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I call it the flat now, it doesnt feel like home anymore, without you here. you were what made it home in the first place. i hope you know how much you helped me through all those dark times. when it was all hopeless & i hope you know how much i appreciated everything you did for me, the times i
couldnt sleep, it didnt matter what time it was, you'd be there, to hug me, or play with me, whatever i needed, without ever asking for anything in return, and with no judgement at all. no human could give me that. for the last 7 years i have never been alone. i cant stand being alone now, its the emptyest kind of alone there is. but i'm glad that i was with you at the end,i hope i gave you the life you deserved, and that i made you as happy as you made me. it's so ironic that you passed in the end because your heart was too big. i hope those last few moments you werent in pain, i hope that it was a comfort to have me there with you. i know you were frightened i could see it in your eyes. i hope you know how much i miss you, & how loved you were and always will be. i would do anything to get you back my little monster, my heart is broken, i feel incomplete without my little partner in crime! like my sister says, we came as a package  x

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eliza

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Reply with quote  #2 
Just remember, you were there for you baby, too. It was a two-way street. Unconditional love. 

I totally get the emptiness. Hang in there. But just remember, your baby was loved and knew it.

And so pretty. Thanks for the pictures. Love the ice cream photo. What was your baby's name?
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Mia870

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Reply with quote  #3 

I lost my best friend on the 2nd of May and I still struggle to think that I will never see her again :( I don't know how to get through it, I guess just one day at a time.   


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Mia Jessie aged: 11 years. Always our puppy girl xxxxxx
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nikki

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Reply with quote  #4 

she was called hunni, but also answered to monster & fatty :)  she was a wonderful dog, she really was my best friend, i got her when i'd had a really rough time & had moved out on my own at 17, she was a rescue dog who'd been abandoned, so she was as lost as i was. really helped my through the hardest times of my life. just miss her so much, she had an enlarged heart & had been on medication for a while, she was only 7, still young at heart, but her heart just gave up on sunday morning. i'm just so grateful that i was there with her, but i cant stop thinking about it, i dont want to remember her in her last moments, but i just cant help it. i'm lost without her, she came everywhere with me, my little companion. just feel incomplete without her. it is nice to know people are feeling the same way. that there are people out there who understand how much a pet means to you. i've cried consecutively for 5 days now, tried to go into work, but i work with the young disabled, & hunni used to come to work with me (she was a softy with everyone & anyone!) & the residents all loved her to bits, so it was quite hard telling them without bursting into tears myself! my boss gave me the rest of the week off. felt a little bit better today, my eyes are less puffy at least! but night times the worst. going to make a little tribute video for her, if you listen to 'my beloved monster' by the eels, it suits my little furry cherub down to a tea! think that will help  x

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petz

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Reply with quote  #5 
hang in there nikki. I'm going through the same, more or less - but I have a new dog already ! I couldn't bear the huge hole in my life. So I decided to go on, start a new chapter and a new companionship. Not to replace, but to be able to look back and smile. They are all very special in each and every way - we just have to move on and help ourselves. I dindn't think I was ready but Cooper was waiting for me already. And I can smile again.
Take care
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nikki

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Reply with quote  #6 
i dont blame you at all. you shouldnt feel guilty either, like you say it's not replacing, they can never be replaced, but i miss the companionship. luckily my partner has just moved in with me & we now have his dog living with us, i think if bindi (lee's dog) wasnt here, i wouldn't be able to cope. i prefer dogs company to humans! i have been doing a little bit better, still miss her & night time is the worst, so i do have a cry, but it's no longer floods of tears constantly! still miss her like mad, i just want her ashes back now, just have her back at home where she belongs, & we are going camping to newquay (cornwall, england) in a fortnight, i was dreading it & ringing them to tell them only one dog was coming was hard, but i'm starting to look forward to the break now. you take care too, thank you  x
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