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Chandlers_Dad

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Reply with quote  #16 

Thank you for all of your very nice replies. It seems like I have quite a bit in common with many of you, as you can identify with what I'm feeling, as well as with everyone else, too. I also can feel your pain and emptiness. This forum does help make us realize we are not alone in this journey.

I can't believe my buddy boy has already been gone for two weeks, as of today. I am giving his mother and sister extra attention (and they're eating it up!) because they, too, are grieving. Okay, maybe not his sister, so much... they didn't get along that well, but she definitely senses Chandler's absence.

I feel like I did hit a milestone over the last couple of days, though: I have been talking about him more, and about more than just his last two weeks, or worse, his final hours. The lump in the throat still shows up, but it gives me strength to know that memories of him will someday be met with smiles and laughter, instead of tears and escape. I know it will take a while longer, but I have this forum so I'll be fine.

You're all awesome. Thanks again.

Bruce

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Marie123

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Reply with quote  #17 
That's what we're all here here for Bruce! I'm only just now able to talk about my Raven without breaking down. Just know you're not alone in this. These animals were more than just pets, in many cases they were lives, our soul mates. We shouldn't hide our grief, not even from the folks who don't understand. We should be glad these animals touched our lives and made us who we are. Blessings to you 🌈
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Chandlers_Dad

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Reply with quote  #18 
Good evening, everyone,

Your support has been incredible. To see how much loved is poured into our furry family members is uplifting. I only wish I could reply to everyone whose posts I have read. Whether I have or not, you're in my thoughts and prayers.

Now, Round 2. As I grieve for Chandler, today I noticed the exact same symptoms with his sister, Phoebe. (Don't judge... I really liked "Friends" in the 90s, lol.) Can feel her spine, her belly is hard, she is the weight of a feather, etc. Phoebe was never as loving and affectionate as Chandler, and she did not get along with her brother, but I am worried, nonetheless. I feel guilty that when Chandler got so sick, all I could ask was, "Why Chandler??" He was my boy, but that certainly didn't mean I wanted Phoebe or their mother India to die instead...

I have seen many posts where others are worried about surviving pets, too. To be sure, I am getting her to the vet on Thursday. Just wanted to vent, and thanks again for listening.

Best,
Bruce
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Chandlers_Dad

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Reply with quote  #19 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marie123
That's what we're all here here for Bruce! I'm only just now able to talk about my Raven without breaking down. Just know you're not alone in this. These animals were more than just pets, in many cases they were lives, our soul mates. We shouldn't hide our grief, not even from the folks who don't understand. We should be glad these animals touched our lives and made us who we are. Blessings to you 🌈
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Chandlers_Dad

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Posts: 174
Reply with quote  #20 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marie123
Same here. I still catch myself worrying about Raven like I did when I had to leave her when she got bad. Then I remember and it hits me again. I'm getting to where I hate leaving my other pets for any reason and worrying about them now too. I wonder if its just paranoia or my nerves?
Blessings to you all
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Chandlers_Dad

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Reply with quote  #21 
Thank you so much, Marie123. I am so sorry about Raven, and appreciate your support. I give it right back to you. Hoping and wishing for the best for you.
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Chandlers_Dad

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Reply with quote  #22 
Thank you, BonniesMum. I hope it's just paranoia. She's always been more delicate, skittish, and reclusive, but over the last year she has finally come around and realized how much she loves being loved on. She's 12, so obviously it took her a long while. I appreciate the good thoughts. Can't go through this again, not now.
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Chandlers_Dad

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Posts: 174
Reply with quote  #23 
Marie123, I have been reading through your posts and I don't think I have adequately conveyed not only how much I appreciate you, but how much I feel for your own loss. Blinded by my own grief, I joined this forum for my support... not totally realizing I need to be supportive, as well. I am indeed supportive, and truly want to convey that. I tremendously apologize if I ever seemed insensitive!
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Marie123

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Reply with quote  #24 
Thank you, Bruce. And just know I'll be praying for your Phoebe. Keep us all posted on how she's doing. It's never easy when one of our furry babies isn't doing so good. It's no problem. You obviously love your babies as much as all of us here do so don't worry about seeming insensitive. You're a kind and caring person by the way you talk about your Chandler and Phoebe (Love the names, I've had Mulder and Scully in my cat family myself!) Hopefully all will turn out well for Phoebe. You can be sure you guys are in our thoughts!
Blessings to you all 🐺
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lettersatlarge

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Posts: 153
Reply with quote  #25 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marie123
Same here. I still catch myself worrying about Raven like I did when I had to leave her when she got bad. Then I remember and it hits me again. I'm getting to where I hate leaving my other pets for any reason and worrying about them now too. I wonder if its just paranoia or my nerves? Blessings to you all


Its been two months since Dante passed and since then I've been painfully conscious of the fact that he is no longer at home, but last night on my way home from work for one brief moment I had that familiar feeling of looking forward to see him rolling around on the grass outside and I was so mad at myself for forgetting and doing that to myself. It stung so hard, and it was upsetting because I know better.
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Marie123

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Reply with quote  #26 
I know what that's like! And what's really weird is now I've been slipping up and calling my younger female cat Roswell by Raven's name. Ive always gotten everyone mixed up from time to time but this is just disturbing. And these past few days have just been the WORST!!! I feel like I'm going out of my mind
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Sunshineambi

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Reply with quote  #27 
Please let us know how Phoebe gets on at the vets, it's so hard loosing a pet, I really hope she's okay. Little things keep upsetting me at the minute, like my pet insurance company wrote to me today cancelling the insurance now that Amber has died. It's good that they have done this automatically and I haven't had to action it myself, but seeing it on paper sent me to tears again. πŸ™
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Marie123

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Reply with quote  #28 
Aawww yeah don't you just hate those little reminders? It's like salt in a paper cut!
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Chandlers_Dad

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Reply with quote  #29 
Thanks, everyone. I will let you know as soon as I know something myself. I feel guilty because my grief over losing Chandler seems to overshadow everything right now. Last night I had a meltdown about him, all while worrying about Phoebe. It's a day by day thing, sometimes moment by moment, but I know you understand. Phoebe is resting comfortably right now and I pray she'll be okay.
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Marie123

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Reply with quote  #30 
Aawww we'll all be praying for you and Phoebe too. I'm still grieving for Raven and like you said it overshadows everything else. My friend's have had some bad stuff going on in their lives and as much as I'd like to be there for them it's like I'm in this whole other world where the only thing is my grief. Last night must've been meltdown night cuz I had one too just cried and almost screaming it hurt so much. It's almost too much at times isn't it? There really aren't any rules to this whole thing so don't hold it in, it'll only make you feel worse. Just take it one day at a time (or one minute) and know we're here for you and Phoebe as well! 🐱🐺🐢
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