Yesterday my little companion left me,I held her in my arms and told her that I loved her and that she was taking a piece of my heart with her-I felt so heart broken.

The day I first met Sylvie was on a fall day,she was in with two other cats-she was in the back hiding with her big eyes looking at me,her head at an angle,it was then she decided that she chose me to spend ten years of her life with me.

She wasn't a lap cat but she showed her affection in other ways mostly with her eyes,she stared at me intently at times,this was her way of communicating with me.

She loved being combed and brushed her tail flicking back n forth,I feel guilty now about the times I scolded her for something she had done.

When Sylvie was spayed she lost all interest in being active and gained weight,we tried different foods and even brought her a brother named Zeke to see if she would gain back her playfulness but no she became withdrawn and was happy with being really independant,she never did lose any weight from about 2004,The vet gave us assorted reasons why.

Then 2009 came and we found out that she had thyroid problem and that possibly was the reason for her weight,so we gave her medicine twice a day then we had to take her off her meds because she became constipated,then a few months went by we then decided to put her back on her meds,I won't go into the vet we seen and the various tests we were asked to do like blood,urine.

The last 2 visits to the vet is when we found out that Sylvie was also diebetic,we were given a demo on her to give her insulin and sent on our way.

Well Sylvie didn't respond well and she became really lethargic and her breathing became really laboured,we went back to the vet the next day and I wasn't happy with what we were told-The only thing I heard was "I don't know why she is lethargic" it was then we decided to take her to another vet.

Well this new vet said a number of things right off the bat and recommended that Sylvie stay at the vet hospital for a day because she was concerned about her state.

So for the next 24 hours they did a battery of tests well the prognosis was not good when we called the next day.

It was then the vet suggested that Sylvie be euthanized,so then the next 24 hours were awful knowing what was going to happen the next day,There was a 3 or 4 things wrong with her health,I am still mad about the other vet and her I don't know answer maybe she didn't know all along and could have suggested to take Sylvie to another vet along time ago instead of asking us to come back for blood tests.

Maybe they tried thier best but to have us come back for 2 years when maybe if we had gone to another vet instead.

This other vet in one fell swoop in a span of 24 hours found Sylvie not well.

We were given about 40 minutes to be with Sylvie and I just held her,I have this tremendous guilt if we had just went to another vet instead maybe we could have Sylvie here-I don't know.

When I held her I told her that I loved her and that If I had failed her that I was sorry,she gave me this one last meow,layed her on my lap,When the vet gave her the shot she was gone,I cried again and kissed her head I said "Sylvie you leave me with a broken heart"

My roomate said goodbye to and had both our hands on her when she left us.

For some funny reason I get this mental image of her walking on some lonely deserted street,it's fall and the sun is setting,I am walking behind her with my knapsack with all our worldly possessions looking for some place to sleep for the night.

I happy you came into my life for 10 years my little companion,my friend who would lay down beside me while we watched the late night talk shows or the silly informercials.

I love you and miss you.

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I am so sorry to hear about your precious Sylvie- I know what you are going through now is really devastating- I was there three months ago yesterday with my beloved dog Mollie. There is still not a day that goes by that I don't think of her and have a quiet cry. 

There are always the 'what ifs' and they will drive you crazy to think about them. We all wonder what if we had noticed that our companions were sick earlier, what if we had not let them out that evening, what if we had more money to pay for more tests and operations... the list is very long.

Unfortunately for all of us, there is no turning back, but be assured that we all made the decision to put our beloved companions to sleep with the best knowledge we had at the time and with the kindest intentions possible. Nobody here made that decision lightly, in fact, it was the hardest decision that most of us have ever had to make.

Sylvie was lucky that you were there with her, comforting her, so that she could pass on gently, surrounded by those who loved her the most. We could all be so lucky.

The road ahead will be one filled with more downs than ups (at least for a while), but eventually, the better days will begin to outnumber the bad ones. Grieve your loss as you see fit, but be kind to yourself as well- grieving really is tiring work!  Know that you will be with Sylvie again, and the bond you shared cannot be broken.



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Thank you for your kind words Pam.
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Today I have to say good bye to my dog Lady. In just a few month she went down hill. I really know how you feel. It is such hard thing to deal with. My thoughts are with you!
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