Dear JJ, Danzey, Seamus, Sandy_T, and Mistysmama.
Thank you all so much for your kind words and helpful, sensible advice. Thank you also for sharing your stories with me. It does help to know what you've been through and how you have dealt with it. I am sorry for your losses too, as I know we are all here for the same reason. I have always loved both my girls, but never had a bond with Mable like the one I had with Molly. I could read Molly so well, but Mable is much more difficult. I feel very lucky to have her - she is the only reason I'm keeping going at the moment, and I hate to think of her being unhappy. She has settled a bit and has not been crying again. I found her sleeping on the bed earlier, rather than under it, which is more normal behaviour for her. She is eating well, and I am probably over-feeding her which I know I shouldn't, but I feel like she's been through so much. I am offering her lots of love and trying to make sure this is on her terms, when she wants it. Thank you Danzey for suggesting playing with her - I have started tossing about her favourite toy and she is responding well to this. She's a bit of a crazy cat and always likes a game. Seamus - I will certainly take your advice about talking to the vet about having another cat, as Mable is my priority now. I am thinking of taking her for a check up anyway, although I don't want to upset her. She went to hospital with Molly as a blood donor (although sadly couldn't donate in the end) so she was checked over there. I'm just so terrified that because I can't read her as well, what if I don't notice something. Molly died from IMHA, which they said is not genetic and the risk of Mable getting it too is tiny. Sandy_T - I had also wondered about "borrowing" a friend's cat, to see how Mable would react to it. At my Mum's, Bertie (my Mum's cat) spent hours looking at Mable under the door. Neither of them seemed bothered, just interested in each other, although it was not in Mable's territory. Thank you all for telling me I am doing the right things by her. I talked to her again and explained that Molly didn't leave because she wanted to, but that she was very sick and needed to go to sleep forever. I've told her that it wasn't hers or Molly's fault, and that I love her very much. I am undecided about getting another cat at this point, both for me, and for Mable. I could never replace Molly and would not want to. She stole my heart and took a huge piece of it with her when she left. I am afraid that if I took a new cat, I would resent it. I will never bring an animal into my home that I am not willing to love and commit to, but there is a very big hole in my life, and I know I can provide a safe and loving home for a cat. Although Molly was shy and timid, she was always the boss cat. Perhaps Mable will enjoy being in charge now, but I'm not convinced. Molly used to groom her every night, since they were babies. If I get a new one, I think I will have to choose a young one that fits into Mable's territory. I had always thought that if, God forbid, something was to happen to one of them, that Molly would cope better without Mable than the other way around. On the other hand, I've always thought Mable would cope better with a new cat than Molly. I had thought of getting a 3rd cat from a shelter a while ago, but knew Molly would have hated it. Anyway, sorry for another long post. I find it so helpful to be able to come here and "talk" to people who understand. I am very thankful for people confirming that pets do feel loss, as so many people just don't seem to connect with animals on that level. Thank you all xx
"If the sky comes falling down, for you, there's nothing in this world I wouldn't do"