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Reply with quote  #31 
Same here Shana. I would give anything just for another few minutes with my Henry.
I remember so many times I would think and worry about what would become of him if anything happened to me. I couldn't bear the thought of him ever being unhappy or wondering where his Mommy was. And now it's me whose left unhappy and wondering where in the universe he might be. I pray every night that it's heaven.. and that we will be reunited when my time comes.
Many hugs to you!

Carol
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Shanamylove

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Reply with quote  #32 
155,
Oh my goodness I feel the same exact way. I wonder all of the time if she is in heaven and what is she doing? I have never wanted to die so badly just to be reunited with her. There is absolutely not one single human being on this earth that I would rather be with than to be with her . I have researched packed and where they go when they die? I found a so called pet medium on YouTube and she says she can communicate with them. I thought about contacting her but being a born again Christian I know that would be wrong. And it is just as you said that now we are the one who left wondering about them. I always thought that if I died before both of them I would not want them thinking I abandoned them. I just go on day by day doing the best I can. I honestly try not to think about her as much because I can't bear the pain anymore. I look forward to buying reunited with her.

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Millie
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lorrae22

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Reply with quote  #33 
I'm am sorry for everyone's loss! When I was having the worst time, the first few days, my husband asked if I ever heard of "The Rainbow Bridge". It is a great poem and I just imagine my Daisy there, on the other side of the rainbow waiting for me. It has been 2 weeks since I lost my sweet girl and the emotions come in waves. I have a 3 year old daughter and after I put her to bed, I shut my bedroom door and hold her little box. I just rock her and talk to her for a small amount of time. We cleared a shelf in my bedroom and made a little memorial for her. Picture of her, her little toy she had when she first came home, her, and s vase of Daisys.
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Dawn L Johnson
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Reply with quote  #34 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shanamylove
155,
Oh my goodness I feel the same exact way. I wonder all of the time if she is in heaven and what is she doing? I have never wanted to die so badly just to be reunited with her. There is absolutely not one single human being on this earth that I would rather be with than to be with her . I have researched packed and where they go when they die? I found a so called pet medium on YouTube and she says she can communicate with them. I thought about contacting her but being a born again Christian I know that would be wrong. And it is just as you said that now we are the one who left wondering about them. I always thought that if I died before both of them I would not want them thinking I abandoned them. I just go on day by day doing the best I can. I honestly try not to think about her as much because I can't bear the pain anymore. I look forward to buying reunited with her.
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155

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Reply with quote  #35 
I know it's so hard to have them on your mind 24/7. For me I seem to have this constant lump in my throat. I realize it's just a sensation but it makes me nauseous and unable to eat. Yesterday I didn't feel too too bad however today has been not so good. Maybe because it's Saturday??
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Reply with quote  #36 
Shana,
One of my worst fears was to pass before my Henry as I said , and have no one to look.after him the way he'd become accustomed to being taken care of.
Along with that was having him think I'd abandoned him. I did everything under the sun and spent a small fortune on meds and tests trying to give both of us more time. From the date of diagnosis he was pretty good for almost 3 months. Walking around, using the litter box, eating and drinking and generally being sociable. He did sleep a lot in between though.
Then one morning my poor baby tried to eat his food and immediately threw up. A liitle while later same thing bringing up the foam which had started the whole ordeal. At that point I knew he had come full circle. His meds wern't having any effect now and the cancer had spread to his nail beds in the meantime. I had even tried natural products from a holistic vet. And as last resort somewhere in the end of the second month I took him to a touch therapist for a few sessions.
I hope he knows how much I tried to help him and how much I loved and adored him and I always will. Like yourself I just wait and look forward to our being reunited at the bridge.
Many hugs.
Carol
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elliemae

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Reply with quote  #37 
This site is just what I needed;  believe me everyone i am or have experienced all the things you are going through.  My Napoleon will be gone 1 month on the 14th of January;  its still terrible but its bearable I guess.  He had a very aggressive cancer I keep telling myself putting him down was the kindest thing as he was suffering.  However he went down VERY QUICKLY in a few days actually as the oncologist said he would so to me it was sudden. We all miss him every minute of every day but I TRY SO HARD to stay strong for everyone, especially my Elliemae his constant companion for 9 years.  I know she misses him but there is nothing I can do;  I wonder what she is thinking did we just take him away from her?  I always hoped believe it or not that she would go first cos Napoleon wouldnt miss his pesty little sister so much.  well like the song we cant always get what we want right?



      

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elizabeth a. cannon
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Reply with quote  #38 
Elliemae..Hello again.
I wondered if you recalled how bad it was for you after just a week of Napoleon's passing? It's been just a few days more than a week since I had to have Henry put down and the pain is still beyond unbearable. For some reason today (Saturday) has been very very bad. I can't stop sobbing and I'm having physical symptoms from the stress. It's strange because yesterday I wasn't too awfully bad but today is a complete about face. I've talked to a few friends and family members on the phone who.are very supportive , but it hasn't done a bit of good. I tried distracting myself by walking to the store and doing a bit of cleaning but the extreme sinking feeling just won't let up. Do you think it's because it's only been a week or that I'm going off the deep end?
I'm so very sorry for your baby Napoleon. I wish there was an easier way for all of us. Myself , I am used to loss and grief regarding many family members over the years.. but this is something so much more gut wrenching.

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elliemae

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Reply with quote  #39 
It was very bad trust me.  Its better now though.  And I know what you mean I have lost my parents 2 brothers and a sister - but the loss of my dog was so much worse I don't know why maybe because he was here 24/7?  My hairdresser said the same thing - her dog had congestive heart failure and she put her down at 10 years old and she said it was much worse than losing her father.  Goes to show how attached we get to these guys.
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elizabeth a. cannon
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Shanamylove

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Reply with quote  #40 
Elliemae, 155, Lorrae22, Adv2112, EevaTeddy
I have discovered that it does get a bit easier everyday. My precious Shana died suddenly Nov 29, 2018. At first I was an emotional mess, crying non stop everywhere. The gym, at work. Walmart, at home, of course even with strangers. The pain in my chest was almost unbearable. I thought I was going to die of a broken heart. As time has gone by, my grief has thankfully lessened. I've been cry free about four days now, amazing!! I was even able to lay in her bed two days ago and not cry. I pulled out her ashes and held them tightly against my chest without falling apart. I miss her terribly but my concern has focused more on my little dog Chip. I dare say that he misses her more than me. He runs around the front door as if expecting her to come in at any moment. Last night he was standing in front of her food and water bowls just staring as if someone was there but no one was. He's been doing a lot lately. Looking intently at a specific spot in the house as if someone is there but no one is. I wonder what he's thinking? He was the only one here with her when she passed. I wonder where exactly she is? I have never thought so much about heaven as I have now. I asked myself is she truly happy, does she remember me, can she feel my love and my grief, and so many other questions. Being here on Rainbow Bridge has helped a great deal. Everyone is so supportive and always listens. I didn't know that soooo many people have lost their pets. Wow. Well everyone please try and have a good day. Remember that we were all loved by our precious pets and they would not want us sad.

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Millie
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Reply with quote  #41 
Yes I think that's just it. We feel the loss so much more with our pets because we're around them so much more. I was with Henry 24/7 for his entire life give or take a few weeks at most . I lost both parents, a stepfather, a brother and countless aunts, uncles and cousins. But as far as my immediate family.. I can say that the pain was no where near what it has been with my kitty cat Henry.
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Adv2112

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Reply with quote  #42 
Yes be blessed and try to send them, ......in spiritual form anyway, your love. It still makes me cry when I do so but not as much each day, little by little.
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Shanamylove

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Reply with quote  #43 
I wish I could give all of us a strong tight hug. We will all be ok, eventually. I have had relatives die but no one really close. Even if I did, I don't think it would compare to losing my precious Shana. I think with our pets it's because we know that they loved us unconditionally no matter what. With humans, love is conditional and as long as (blah blah blah) Our pets truly love us. Shana looked forward to my home coming everyday. She would jump on the couch and watch as I parked and walked into the house. So many things that at the time seemed like an annoyance such as her following me all over the place, now I see just how much she really loved me and always wanted to be with me. Even when I wS sick she stayed in our bedroom. Ughhh... Why God, why did you have to take her so soon? I swear I hate God for this even though I shouldn't .
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Millie
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Reply with quote  #44 
Oh dear..You reminded me of how the odd time I would get annoyed at Henry for following me around the house. I would tell him stop following me, you're everywhere I go. I didn't say it in a tone to sound mean...I was just joking with him but now I feel so bad. Now what I wouldn't give to turn around and he be right behind me, or have him following me from room to room. I would give all I had and more.
I tell my daughter who has a cat of her own to take a lesson from this and treat every moment with her kitty cat as the most precious moments of her life. They are gone much to soon.
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Adv2112

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Reply with quote  #45 
Shanamylove and 155, I know what you mean. I always said that I was afraid I'd fall and break a hip from Leo standing under my feet. He just loved me so much and I know what you mean about God. Iam a believer and I keep struggling with how God will work this for the greater good. Going into another evening, marking a week without him :( it's like why did he have to go so soon?
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