LoriJean
It's almost the 3 month mark since I lost my sweet boy.  I'm still in so much pain.  I know things will never be the same, how can they be.  I miss him so very, very much.  I don't sob every day, all day, anymore.  But, there still isn't a bounce in my step. 

There are so many things in my life that I need to talk to him about. And I do still talk and write to him, but there aren't any answers, just words falling into the air, never being heard.  Emptiness is an awful state of being.

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mario8

LoriJean,

I feel your pain because I lost my Max 40 days ago. He was my best friend and at times its so hard to deal with the emotions that I feel. You can still talk to him though. He may not answer in words but his spirit is still very much alive in you and with you. Try and hang in there and GOD bless.

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heartsick
Dear LoriJean - It takes quite a long time for grief to be such a deep part of us that we learn to go on and live with it. Twelve weeks is still so new for grief. Be kind to yourself. We are ALL here for you.
We ALL understand the depth of pain and loss you are feeling.
You are not alone.
LOVE NEVER DIES.
You Are In My Thoughts.
Susan(heartsick)
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judylinn

It still such a short time in your healing path. when we love that deeply, it really is a slow process....it will get better with more time and releasing of the pain. I understand you deep the pain is, and I'm sending blessings your way. Judylinn

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LoriJean
All of you are so sweet.  I'm searching for my purpose.  So much has changed since I lost Tucker.  What is my purpose?  What do I really like in my life?  And why do I do what I do? 

I've lost interest and all of my ambition.  My house is cluttered and messy.  I have no interest in my old hobbies, I actually threw away some projects--they just make me angry right now having them hanging over my head because I feel the need to finish them, but don't want to.  I'm sleeping way too much, eating way too much, not exercising and I don't care right now.  Do any of you feel this way?  I'm also pre-menopause and have a huge neuroma in my left foot that I just started a new procedure for.  I haven't been on a walk since he died, I really do miss going into the woods, but Tuck made it so much more fun, I can't bear to go without him.

thank you!

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mario8

LoriJean,

I think most if not all of us have and still do at times feel what you are feeling. In time I think all of us will understand our purpose and what our lives will be like without our beloved pets. Myself, I try and look at it like a chapter in my life where I was blessed to have those 5 1/2 years with my Max. My wife asked me a great question when she asked me if I would rather not have had him those years and never had even met my Max or be thankul for the years I did have him. I wouldn't take anything back as I cant even imagine me never had having him in my life. The pain is unbearable at times but the love that he gave me can never be replaced and I hold that deep in my heart. Hang in there and GOD bless.

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heartsick
I am writing a book about the dog I rescued and the puppies I delivered. I am behind because after Bear died I could not write one word for nearly 9 months.
I used to read one or two books a week- and if Bear was sleeping, I wouldn't want to disturb the baby so I would read by flashlight - I have not read a complete book since I lost him. Stuff just doesn't matter the same anymore.
You are NOT alone.

It will come back - it just takes a great deal of time. I am still not back where I was.

I tell people that if no one has died that day then it is a good day.
The minor nonsense just does not matter.

That is how my priorities have changed as I see it now.

We are ALL here for you.
My Thoughts are With You.
Susan(heartsick)



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LoriJean
thank you!

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panda

Dear LoriJean,

Please don't be too hard on yourself as so little time has gone by  since your precious Tucker passed.

Your purpose in life will come to you when the time is right.

 

Please don't be concerned about an untidy house as mine is the same.  I too have lost interest in things that used to interest me, I used to read and read but now just can't get involved in a book.  My hobbies too writing and painting give me no pleasure and I feel like tossing them all out.   

 

I really like what Mario said about rather not have had  him and missing out on those wonderful years ....... and I too wouldn't take anything back. I lost my old Rudicat of 17 yrs three weeks ago and am shortly to lose my 16-yr old cavalier so I too know all about anguish. It's quite overwhelming and I so feel your pain. 

 

Susan said it will come back and it takes time, and she should know as she has lost so much.  I will try and hold on to that and I hope you can too.

Blessings.

 

 

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LoriJean
Thank you everyone.  Somewhere, deep inside, I know that all of you are speaking the truth.  I too have lost many, many pets through the years and find that they all have left holes in my heart, Tuck leaving the larges hole yet.

LJ

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heartsick
LoriJean - my house is so cluttered and I just don't care anymore - no one died today so it was a good day.
If the clean clothes are just in a big pile -
who cares?
Do whatever you can do and make sure you get enough
non-alcoholic and non-caffeine fluids so you don't dehydrate.
The rest doesn't matter.
Get some sleep, drink water - juice- whatever...
It takes a great deal of time to travel down this path of grief-
Eventually- and slowly- things begin to come back.
You are in My Thoughts.
Susan(heartsick)

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stickysforeverdaddy
LoriJean, you are so right. Here I am almost 8 months out from Stickys passing. I feel the same way. Things will never be the same. How can they be? That is why I believe that there are some wounds that will never be healed in this world. Those wounds can only be healed when we move to the next world and meet our fur babys again. They are the lucky ones because they know when that day will come. It is so hard for us left behind because we do not.....just my thoughts.



stickysforeverdaddy
David
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mkwoodrich
LoriJean, I'm so sorry to hear of your loss.  I am putting my beloved boxer Dak down on Saturday.  I can't eat or sleep knowing that I am days away from my final goodbye to him.

I was driving down the street today and just started bawling out of no where.  My boyfriend must think I am crazy, he likes animals but he doesn't wear his emotions on his sleeve like I do. 

My Dak has been living at my moms the last several years due to my divorce and not able to have a dog when we moved.  So my son and I have missed him horribly even though we knew where he was here in town, it's not the same when they don't live with you.

So although I am  not in your shoes yet, I expect Saturday morning I will be.  Take care, this is so hard.
Loved you yesterday. Love you still. Always have. Always will.
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heartsick
Just wanted you to know I am thinking
of  you.
Susan(heartsick)
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