I am so sorry for your loss. Sophie was a lucky girl to have such a devoted Dad and It sounds like she had a wonderful and loving doggie life. It has been almost 1 year for me since my sweet Daisy's sudden and terminal illness and our heartbreaking decision to end her suffering. I don't think you can ever fully prepare for saying goodbye and having to make that horrible decision. I relive that day over and over, but each time, despite my pain, I know I did the right thing for my loving and devoted friend. I made a promise to care for her always and I held her while she died thanking her for her love and life. I also found coming home without my girl waiting at the door for me one of the hardest things to bear. Though I am not religious, sometimes I believe my Daisy is still waiting somewhere for me and one day I will be with her again. After 1 year, I am just starting to feel grounded again. 4 months after losing our girl I did adopt again, though many (including family) thought it was way too soon. Our puppy, Luna, is now 10 months and I am starting to feel things beginning to right themselves. She is a good little girl and has become my sweet companion. It was very hard in the beginning, though puppies are cute, they are a lot of work. It did help me focus on daily tasks...Get up because the puppy needs to pee, vetting, training, can't sleep...that's okay, puppy probably needs a potty break too... Bonding was not automatic either. It took several months before I could open my heart to Luna but through it all, I just focused on one task at a time and gradually love bloomed. Sometimes forcing one foot in front of the other is the only way to plow through that pain and overwhelming grief of loss. But that is the thing about loss, and grief...you just have to force your way through it. There are no shortcuts or time limits. Just allow yourself to feel every emotion. There are days that will be bearable, but days that heartbreak will take your breath away. Eventually the hard edges of your pain will soften to the point and you will begin to remember the sweet times together. I wish you peace and healing.
Lori, Daisy's Mom and now Luna's Mom