MLovesRuby
Hallo Everyone,

I lost my beautiful pure black 16 year old kitty Ruby Tuesday on May 29th of this year to that cursed cancer.  The hardest most painful loss of my life.  I love her and miss her every day and have a cry when I remember her perfect face and perfect warm body and her perfect personality.  I live alone, so my days are long and empty now.  She brought life and joy and peace into my heart and home.  Two months of existing...just waking up, going through the day, empty house, quiet, lonely.

I feed and water the outside babies.  Since I have lived in my house, I've found homes for 9 cats that I have been able to befriend.  Ruby would NOT allow any other cat in our home!!!  She had a one cat only rule.  For the past week I've noticed a ginger cat in my backyard.  The first time I tried to talk to it, it came close to me, but then slinked off into the backyard and over the fence.  The second time I was heading out to the store and he was eating on the table and then jumped off as soon as I opened the back door and left again.  On Thursday evening, I went to put out water and food and he was hiding behind the fire pit.  I got down on my haunches and talked to him/her.  He came right up to me and started rubbing on my knees.  I asked him if he would like to come inside and he followed me right into the house!  I poured him some water and got him a can of pate (I kept Ruby's food, just in case of this very thing) and Man, he gobbled it up!  He (I say "he" because it's my understanding that most gingers are males) purred and rubbed against me.  I would say he's about a year old and HUGE.  Almost double the size of Ruby.  I looked at his backside and please forgive me for saying this, but I didn't see what I was expecting to see....if you know what I mean!  Now, I'm didn't want to be intrusive, and he didn't seem to like me peering at his bum, so I let him walk around and inspect the house.  I have always had female cats, but I do know that male cats like to spray, so I was really worried about that.  Right away I also showed him the litterbox, another thing of Ruby's that I kept, although I had washed it out.  I refilled with fresh kitty litter, and he dug right in and had a go of it and covered it up!  Holy Cow....he knows what to do!  He is such a skinny boy, I can feel his ribs and his spine is boney, so I'm glad I could give him a good meal.

He must be someone's cat.  He is soooo mushy and gentle and sweet.  I checked him for ticks...he rolled on his stomach and let me scratch him.  His ears are clean, and his teeth are in good shape.  I was talking to him telling him what a good boy his is, and he just held my gaze the whole time, like he was listening and understanding every word I said.  Then jumped on the couch and closed his eyes, purring like an engine.  Well.....today is Monday and he is still here!  He has not made one move towards the back door crying to be let out.  I've even opened the front door with the screen door closed but the screen open, thinking that smelling the outside air might trigger him into wanting to go outside.  He'll sit at the door and sniff the fresh air, then turns right around and jumps back on the bed, not at all interested in going outside.  He sleeps almost all day and all night.  He eats like a teenage boy (which I am thrilled about!) and hugs me and slips his head under my chin and lays across my whole body and falls asleep.  Ruby was my world and she loved me and cuddled me, but this guy is just taking it to a whole new level!  On the other hand, he is not constantly clingy.  He will go over to his favorite bed he picked out and flop down, have a bit of a bath, and fall asleep.  He's actually quite wonderful!  No spraying, hasn't jumped on the counter, no litter accidents.  What in the world??!?!?

I know I have to take him to the vet to see if he is chipped.  I just want to gain his trust a little bit more before I put him in a carrier for the car ride, etc.  He is so well behaved that he must be somebody's cat.  But he was so skinny and starving and bony...what could have happened?  I will also ask all my neighbors (I know many of them) if they have heard of a missing cat, and ask my friend to put him on her Facebook (I don't have Facebook.....or even a cell phone for that matter) and see what happens. 

But I will say this......petting and schmooshing a purring cat again is just so wonderful!!!!  And he talks!  He can hold a conversation very well!  I took several pictures of him with my camera, but the photo is too big to put on this forum (I am not very good with computers!)  One other thing I've noticed is that he doesn't play.  I brought out some of Ruby's toys...no reaction.  I've tried the string toys, paper balls, bouncy balls, cat nip....nothing.  He likes to sleep and cuddle and purr.  That's about it.

The first night he was here, I talked to Ruby about him and cried and said I was sorry, please forgive me, My Girl....but what can I do?  I will never turn away a hungry baby.  I'm afraid of saying the same things to him as I used to say to Ruby.  Mostly because those memories hurt, and because he isn't her.  I guess I will have to find some new phrases for this boy.

So........me thinks I might have a cat......................???

I'll let you know how this all works out.
Peace
Michelle
Michelle
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Memories_of_Marmalade
Dear Michelle,

What a wonderful post. Thank you for sharing and for providing some comfort and respite to your new orange friend. And thank you and may God bless and keep you for helping the other cats that you have over time.

A kitten (my current cat "KID") showed up out of nowhere 2 months almost to the day that my cat "Marmalade" departed. Almost as if "Marmalade" crossed the kittens path with mine, as he knew how completely heartbroken I was.

Supposedly, and I have read this many times during extensive research, a beloved pet that has passed can "whisper into the ear of another pet instructing it to do something." At times with someone elses pet, one of our own / other pets, or to a stray animal that needs a home. This has been well documented.

"Marmalade "was a resue and so is my current cat "KID." And I associate with a few cat rescue groups and a local feeder of strays and feral's. The odds are you have a stray cat (as it is affectionate) which may have gotten abandoned or lost. It happens all the time, thus its interest in staying put and communicating with you and being so affectionate. It is appreciative of your kindness, compassion, care and affection.

I too waited a bit before I took "KID" to the Vet the first time. I wanted him to stabilize, get a bit healthier and trust me more. It made a difference I think to this day. We have a very strong bond now. If your orange friend does not appear sickly I agree you are being wise.

My "Marmalade" also did not know how to play with toys. As no one had ever played with him before. I still do not know if he was a stray who was abandoned and got lost, but was cared for as a kitten, so was affectionate and domesticated to a point, or if he was a smart feral who let his guard down. Which can happen.

"KID" brough much needed love, laughter, joy and light into my life again. Which I did not think was possible. I had swore off ever having another cat again after I was destroyed with "Marmalade's" departure. But what "KID" taught me, and reminded me was the deep love I was capable of giving and receiving. And that 1 minute, 1 hour, 1 day, 1 evening, 1 week, 1 month and/or 1 year is well worth knowing them and having them in our lives. They are miraculous, enchanting, magical, mystical creatures. God's gift to us as companions who express such unconditional love.

I totally understand coming up with new sayings and retiring the ones that you used to share with your "Ruby." I also tell "Marmalade" that "KID" says "Hello" and visa versa when I go back and forth to our two buildings. I think you are honoring your great love for "Ruby" by helping a lost soul the way that you are doing.

Anyway, thank you again for sharing. Your post was a nice uplifting and inspiring story that shows that this forum can celebrate "life" too.

Kind regards,
James
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MLovesRuby
Hi James!  Thank you for your kind post.  I knew at some point I was going to hopefully be picked to be a cat mum again.  Either by going to our Street Cat Rescue or by befriending a baby in need in my backyard.  This fellow came out of nowhere....just like you said, and I wondered in the back of my mind if Ruby had led him to me.  Dare I say he is almost a ready made cat?  He appears very healthy, bright eyes, clean fur, but he was either bitten by a lot of mosquitoes on the nose or he was battered by another cat.  It's not bleeding, but he seems to have injuries on his nose that I'm washing and watching over. 

He doesn't bother me when I'm eating...doesn't beg for food.  I've tried sharing my meal with him (a piece of pork chop, no coating or spices!) and he's not interested at all.  He doesn't wake me up when I'm sleeping.  He likes to cuddle a bit and purr, then off he goes to his bed that he picked out and wakes up when I wake up.  He doesn't get tangled underfoot.  He has a lovely deep voice.  He'll watch every move I make and if I catch his eye, he's instantly start purring...I can hear him from 5 feet away!  And he just stares at me blinking when I talk to him and always talks back.  What is happening??!??!?  Where did this creature come from????!?!?  You're right, they are enchanting magical creatures!  

I love your story about you and Marmalade.  James, it could be made into a movie!  I'm so glad that Kid came into your life and reminded you that your heart is too big not to share with another sweet soul.   I'm glad that he has made you smile and bring you light.  I too was in a dark pit and I didn't think I was ready at all for another.  I loved Ruby more and more everyday with all of my being and I didn't think I would ever stop crying and wishing for my girl back.  This guy has already shown me, in 4 days, that I can smile, and cuddle and "fuss" over and brush (he LOVES being brushed!) and tickle and feel that heartbeat again.   

May I say that he looks a bit like your Marmalade?  From the neck down he does, but his face is more of a soft orange that fades from the chin down to the white of his chest and feet.  And 4 rings starting from the middle of his tail all the way down to the end.  He is absolutely handsome!  And hasn't scratched or bitten.....just a mushy and squirmy and purry sleepy boy.  I know he will never replace my Ruby, she was my best friend and perfect little girl.  He has helped me already in the short time he has been with me.

Thanks again, James.  Peace and Love to you.
Michelle 
Michelle
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Memories_of_Marmalade
Hi Michelle,

Thank you kindly for your gracious words. They mean a great deal to me.

You wrote:

He'll watch every move I make and if I catch his eye, he's instantly start purring...I can hear him from 5 feet away!  And he just stares at me blinking when I talk to him and always talks back.  What is happening??!??!?  Where did this creature come from????!?!?  You're right, they are enchanting magical creatures!  

I smiled to myself as I read your words. Me too! I would be sitting at my computer and start to get blue thinking about "Marmalade" and look over and catch a glimpse of KID staring at me. And just seeing his face would make me smile. Now that he has been with me 1 year and really trusts me, he will be laying up on top of his cat condo and will hang upside down and trill at me. And just stare at me in that pose. As if to make me smile and laugh and cheer me up. And he will blink that contented blink at me too. Totally communicating.

Awww. I love those "orange boys" cats. And especially their Tigger Tails. So funny and adorable. They are very special indeed.

And I can hear KID purr too from a distance. They confirm how much they adore and cherish us if I do say so when they purr. Such love from such enchanting creatures. How fortunate and blessed are we to have experienced, or be experiencing such pure love?

You too. Peace and love back at ya!

Hugs,
James
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roseblue1
So glad Michelle you have a new friend...we have also a new rescue kitten ''Remus'' and what a bundle of joy and  boy does he keep us on our toes. joy. Completely different to Monty...but there will only ever be one Monty and we still love miss him every day.

Enjoy your new baby...your house will no longer be empty and you sad.
 
Ellen
Ellen Hague
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MLovesRuby
Hi Ellen!!!!!!!!!!  I was hoping to hear from you!!  Is Remus the outside baby that was coming into your home for meals?  What does Scarlett think of him?  I'm so happy for you too!  And you're right, they will never be our Monty or Ruby, that's why I'm having a hard time with my word phrasing when I talk to this new boy.  When I say something to him that I would have said to Ruby like "what are you doing you silly monkey?" or I would sing the breakfast song to Ruby, now I catch myself from saying the same things to this guy.  To me it's like those words are Ruby's only.  If they do slip out, it hurts.  

This guy (haven't given him a name yet....just in case when I do get him checked for a chip and I have to give him up) is very different from Ruby.  She would give me the look like "leave me alone mum" or walk away from me when I called her.  But ginger boy comes to me when I call him....I pat the couch beside me and say "come see me" and he hops right up.  He loves it when I'm all over him and he holds my arm or my neck when we're hugging.  Don't get Ruby wrong....she cuddled too, but on her terms.  This guy accepts all of my attention and purrs like a Ferrari.

Another thing.....this guy poops like a boy for sure!!  Wowie!!!!  He's eating lots but Yikes!  

I would love to hear more about Remus!!!!

Take care, My Friend!!
oxoxo
Michelle
Michelle
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Bichonz

That’s a great story, Michelle. Hoping you have a new fur baby....

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MLovesRuby
Thank you Bichonz!  I had a plan that by winter time, I would hopefully be ready for a new baby in my home.  I would try to help out anyone who needed a home before it got too cold.  But this guy came along, and if he's okay with it and there is a kitty in need outside, he will accept the new addition if and when the time comes. 

I have always felt like things happen for a reason in life.  Not that I go through life willy nilly waiting for things to happen to me.  But when something organic happens....like this boy....then I accept it for the wonderful thing that it is.  I secretly hope that I can keep him.  He really was ready to move in without any Sheldon Cooper 60 page roommate agreement contract!!!

Take care!!!!
Michelle
Michelle
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fvernon
Hi Michelle,
I hope you are doing ok, I can't believe it has been two months since our babies left us - it still doesn't feel at all real to me and like you, it has been the hardest thing I've ever had to deal with.  I still miss my little boy every day.  I'm so happy that this little boy has found you and made your heart a little less sad, though of course nobody could replace your gorgeous girl.  I am cat sitting as I write this and I have found it so hard, even opening cat food again has brought back so many memories and just being around a cat again has made me feel so guilty and strange.  I totally know what you mean about catching yourself saying the same things to them, out of pure habit but like you, it made me feel bad and that my boy was one in a million and nobody can ever replace him.  Cats choose you though, my little boy wasn't originally my cat but he decided that my garden and house was going to be his home and it turned out to be such a blessing and so perhaps this is what has happened to you.  
Keep us posted on how it works out.
Take care,  Fliss
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roseblue1
Hi Michelle.

The little stray boy we have called Bobby and he likes to come in and have a look around has something to eat and then leave...but that is okay as we will never stop looking after him and make sure he gets his regular Flea and Worm medication...he seems to prefer outside life but has no problem with Remus...as long as Bobby has his food he does not seem to care.
Remus was in a bit of a state when we got him but has really improved with much loving and grooming and good food. He is a good little boy for a kitten as he loves to cuddle up to you. Scarlett loves him... though like me would do anything for Monty to come back through the door but sadly that will never happen...but Michelle we really do miss him so much and like you poor old Remus is called Monty at times...it is just getting use to it. And Monty was like Ruby if he did not want to come to you he would not...or come over half an hour later as everything was on Monty's terms...I could have begged but he would still have ignored me ha ha . And Michelle though we miss our babies our hearts are big enough to love another.

My betting is Michelle that if he does have a home he is going to come straight back to you as cats know a good thing when they see it...and Michelle you have a heart of gold when it comes to cats...you are Queen of the Kitties.

I really do hope that ''Ginger'' becomes your boy/girl because if he does he/she is going to have one hell of a life...lucky kitty.

Take care my friend.

Ellen x

28th July was two months since you lost your Ruby...thinking of you.
Ellen Hague
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MLovesRuby
Hi Fliss!

I hope you are doing okay too.  I totally understand when you say you find it hard even opening a can of cat food.  In the back of my mind, I think that this was Ruby's food...she should be eating it.  I feel strange and a bit guilty as well.  Like I'm cheating on Ruby.  But all he knows is that he's hungry, and the food tastes good and his water glass is always full and his pooper is clean and he has beds to sleep in, and that melts my heart a little more everyday.  He is an innocent little soul.  I will forever mourn my Ruby, just like you mourn your perfect boy.  We had the perfect life.  Now I will try to give this fella all I can to make sure he feels loved just like he deserves.

I wish you all the best, Fliss.  These 2 months have been awful, please take care of yourself.
Peace
Michelle
Michelle
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Memories_of_Marmalade
He is an innocent little soul.

That is exactly how I felt and feel about my rescue kitten KID. He was a lost, innocent soul who had no one and really needed a friend. But he has given back to me 1000 x that which I have provided him. We just celebrated our 1st year together this past July 19th.

: )

James
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MLovesRuby

Hi Ellen!

WOW......so glad to hear Bobby is doing so well, but of course he is because you and Scarlett take such good care of that lucky boy!

What does Remus look like?  He is so lucky he's come to live with 2 wonderful women that will love him and take care of him just like he deserves.  It is really nice to have someone to fuss over again, although like I told Fliss, I do feel a wee bit guilty, like I'm cheating on Ruby's memory.  I didn't expect someone to come into my life so soon after I lost her.  But there is nothing I wouldn't do for him now.

He's actually pretty amazing, really and he's quite funny!  If he sees something on the floor...I dropped a pen.....he stares and stares at it.....like he's studying it.  And he protected me from a moth!  Oh Man, he caught sight of it and then would not rest until he caught and killed it for me!  What a hunter!  He goes nuts for Temptations and he likes yogurt.  I will have to try other treats and see what else this guy likes.

I call him Good Boy for now, but I'm tossing out a couple of names.  Vinnie (for Vinnie Barbarino from Welcome Back Kotter.....really handsome but you can almost hear kitty saying "Who?  What?  Where?"  charming but a little dippy.  Or Carmine....I dunno why, but I've always liked that name and he looks a bit like a Carmine.

I think of you often too, Ellen.  Thank you for your kind words.....and I will say them back to you!  You are the Queen of The Forest!!!

Love and Hugs
ox
Michelle

Michelle
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MLovesRuby
Hi James!

Something that you said in your earlier post....Kid came to you almost 2 months to the day you lost your Marmalade.....so did this guy!!!  It was exactly 8 weeks that he walked through my door....the day that I took Ruby to the vet.  It was a Thursday around 5:30pm that I went there and they took her from me in her carrier and that was the last time I saw her.  I was expecting her to be there overnight, just like in January 2020 for her UTI.  I got the call the next day at 2:10pm saying that her tests showed cancer all through her.  They said she wouldn't survive much longer even with surgery or meds.  She was under sedation and the vet said that it would be best to let her go. I couldn't be with her because of the virus.  I had to make the decision over the phone and it was the worst most painful day of my life.  I still cry when I think of that awful day.

So when this guy walked into my house 8 weeks later, around the same time I took Ruby to the vet, well, did she send him?  Did she know how empty my house feels and sad and empty I feel?  If she did send him....thank you My Girl.  Even though you hated other cats...maybe you felt mummy needed help.  You picked a good one, My Darling.  I will love you forever, Ruby Tuesday.

July 19th will always be a special day for you, James.  It was the date your heart began to heal.  Bless you!

Peace & Joy
Michelle
Michelle
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Deederbestboy
I would like to share something that happened to me about 3 years ago. At that time I had lost my 22 year old black cat Smokey from kidney issues and my 18 year old cat Maggie from horrible jaw cancer. Their deaths took place very close to each other. For me as well, about 2 months later,  I received a call from a woman who had two cats and couldn’t keep them. She had plans to dump them on the street. My friend knew her neighborhood and went and brought them to me. I could not believe it. The black polydactyl looked like my cat Smokey. The only difference was Smokey was not a polydactyl.  The tabby looked like Maggie except bigger and a male. Immediately upon arrival they curled up with my cats and made themselves at home as if they had lived here all their lives. My other cats did not hiss or even look distressed and neither did they. The most amazing thing is the black one acts like Smokey, same mischievous behavior. The tabby really surprised me when I was cleaning and from a chair he tapped me on my head. I tamed Maggie from a young ferile, adult cat. It took years for her to completely trust me but it did happen. One of the things she used to do was tap me on the head to get my attention. To this day these cats are the sweetest, most relaxed cats I have ever met, and I will never forget their strange, incredible arrival into our lives. I had a dream about Deeder just recently. He was still in the oxygen tank. Then I saw a black cat. I thought maybe he was saying, I had a long life and I’m resting now. Love your other babies for the time being. It’s their time now. 
Jeanne Swift
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