Tomorrow night I will be leaving for Mildura,I'm not coping and need to get away and I have doubted my decision about a hundred times but I really need this. At first I felt guilty because going to visit my sister was something I wanted to do so many times but I had to be there for my Fluffy and couldn't bear to be away from her so I felt guilty for doing things I couldn't do because of her, I have now sort of eased my mind on that because I look at photos of Fluffy everyday and tell her look baby mummy is doing what she has to do to be ok and I will, I will be ok. I have been so focused on this trip I haven't really had time to stop and think about her so I am worried that I gave some sadness built up and I really don't want to break down on my 9 hour bus ride. I don't know when but I feel different, good different like I want to get out there live my life and make myself happy which is huge because just days after I lost Fluffy I thought I couldn't go on living without her. It is 2:45am and I now am freaking out about being so far away from where she is buried, I got plenty of pictures to bring but knowing she is laid to rest just outside my window gives me peace also all her things which I still have in my room including my walk in wardrobe which she used to love having a nap in that now every time I open the door I get this smell that brings back memories, now I am leaving that and I don't want to feel far away from that.
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She can be carried with you,  in your heart.  Talk to her and she will be near. x
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I am so very sorry for the loss of your sweet precious Fluffy .

Grief is awful and there is nothing else like this pain.

I am divorced - when I was married I buried my son- at that time I became a Certified Grief Counselor- I used the same graveside service for my Bear as I did for my son.

Please know that when we lose someone we love we don't stop loving them -


The soul bound connection that is between our babies and ourselves is forever.

Nothing - not death- tears -grief - or sadness will ever break the ties between us for those ties are made of LOVE so strong that NOTHING will ever sever those connections.


They are with us wherever we are. I can feel my Bear so very frequently though he is buried in a beautiful animal cemetery about 45 minutes from where I live. My bunnies – Nori an Arthur are buried at his feet. Arthur has only been gone for 5 weeks. Yesterday was the first time I had to take one of the puppies back to the vet since my tiny Arthur died. They are always with us – we feel them and they Love us as we Love them.

When we grieve for those we love it is because we do not quite know how to live without them. We breathe because we have no choice but the living part takes a huge amount of learning and time.

If you read the beginning of any one of our threads you will recognize yourself. We all swell in the same gut wrenching raw searing pain of new grief.

Grief is not something we get over but something that we learn -slowly- over time- to incorporate into our lives until it becomes a part of us like our bones and our breath.

Please know that we all understand here and we are all here for you.

We are all in this together and all walking the same roller coaster path of grief together -

some a bit ahead of you, some by your side, and some will come behind for you to help along.

You Are In My Thoughts.                                       




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