smkovalinsky
Since my Maine Coon cat Dickie died on Saturday,  it has been terrible not to have him in the bed with me,  next to my head.  After my husband died in 2006,  Dickie was such a comfort to me,  keeping me from feeling all alone in the bed.  I used to sleep with my hand on his side.  He was 10,  and I had truly hoped he would be with me until age 18 or 20,  as some kitties are.  The worst part about pet loss is the cold emptiness which their departure leaves.  I guess many people are experiencing this..... Just venting....  :  (
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chipperboy
I am so sorry about Dickie. It is a terrible void without them part of your daily routine. That was one of the worst parts for me....the constant reminders as I went through the day. My sweet boy would sleep at the end of my bed and his snoring, although it kept me up some nights because it was so loud, was a comfort to me.

I am also very sorry about the death of your husband. :o(

I'll be praying for you as you try to adjust to Dickie's physical absence. Please know that he is with you in spirit, laying in his usual spot and sending you a lot of love.

Thanks for posting. We are here for you.

Chipper's Mom

Momma's Chipper Boy (9/19/95 - 1/30/11)
You were the world's BEST dog.....ever! I love you so much!
Chipper's Mom

Momma's Chipper Boy (9/19/95 - 1/30/11) My heart, my love, my buddy! I miss you and love you so, so much! I can't wait to see you at the bridge! Love, Mommy

Lady "Ladybugs" (8/2/03 - 6/5/17) My sweet girl. Thanks for the walks, playtime, sock collection, boo boo kisses and love you gave all of us. We will miss you dearly! Until we meet again...we love you!
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smkovalinsky
Chipper's Mom:  Thanks for your kind words,  most appreciated.  Yes, the daily routine can bring sudden reminders:  Like when I bring in bags from WalMart or the grocery store, and there is no little feline face,  inspecting all the bags and packages :  (  thanks once more for your kind post. 
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teresa808
I am so very sorry about the loss of your husband and now your friend.  I lost my Princess on Sunday, and it is still so difficult to fall asleep at night, I know how you feel.  I am a single girl myself and Princess was also my bed buddy...I had no idea how much impact our furry friends have on our daily lives until they are no longer here with us.  I too lost Princess far earlier than I had expected.  She was also only 10 years old and I was really hoping for 13-15 at the earliest.  The empty feeling along with sadness slowly fades each day a little.  I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.  Be strong and know you will see your friend again one day.

Teresa - Princess's Mommy
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smkovalinsky
Thank you,  Teresa,  and I am sorry your poor Princess had to go at 10, too.  I envy people who have a kitty last until 18 or 20.  : (  You are right:  We take for granted that we have a furry friend in our bed,  or on the couch,  or coming to inspect the grocery bags when we come in from shopping,  and do not realize how greatly this added to our quality of life,  UNTIL it is taken from us.  :  (  Thanks again for your kind words. 
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judylinn

I'm so sorry about Dickie. Do you have a toy of dickies that you can hold. I held one of Maddies babies for a long time. I'm so sorry about your loss. I understand that lonliness and loss. Judy :)

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smkovalinsky
thanks, Judy, that is a good idea!  when my husband died,  I slept with his bathrobe for comfort.  I think I can sleep with Dickie's little bed blanket.  Thank you so much for your kind words.
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moonglow
I want to offer my condolences to Teresa and  to Dickie's mom. I too had my 10 year old kitty pass on 12/13/10 and it's been so painful. Sometimes a think that a whole decade together is a long time, as some kitty's only live a couple years, but I had really hoped he would live to be elderly. I still sleep with his blanket and light a candle every night in front of his pictures. I am single too and miss the companionship he gave. He also helped me through the loss of my best friend in 2001 and my divorce. Today I've had thoughts that Archie is thanking me for letting him go when I did. Since he passed I've suffered with some irrational guilt and it feels good that he is letting me know he was ready to go. I was not ready, but he was. I understand what you are going through with your loss. It does get better but it is a rocky road, especially the first couple weeks. I will keep you both in my prayers.
Kim

I love you my dearest and sweetest little boy "Archie"
I'll be there my little soft baby!
10/27/00 - 12/13/10
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smkovalinsky
Thank you so much,  Kim,  and I am sorry about your Archie.  Yes,  a decade is a long time,  but I suppose at that age,  one is hoping and praying for 5-7 more years (I know I was, and yet oddly enough, even when Dickie seemed in good health, I feared he would not last).   I have suffered guilt ,  too (irrational or not,  I do not know).  My kitty died from gastrointestinal lymphoma ,  which I had never heard of,  but now that I research it,  I often cry out in dismay at the signs I missed or tried to deny away.  I would love it if Dickie could let me know it was his time.  My mother who is 80 years old was very, very attached to him as well,  and she tries to tell me it was best that it was brief, rather than long months of chemotherapy.  I hope so.  Bless you for your kind words.  Susan
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moonglow
 Hi Susan: I use to worry about Archie's health too, he was kind of a delicate kitty, Persian.
He had what was thought to be IBD (inflammatory bowel disease) most of his life and it was pretty controlled I thought until he suddenly got very sick and the Dr's said his IBD may have become lymphoma. Hindsight is always 20/20 and things that did not cross my mind before do now. I guess we all go through a certain degree of 2nd guessing. The bottom line is that even loving them as much as we do, and trying to do the best for them that we can, they can still get sick. They are also so good at hiding their illness. I agree with your mother that it was better not to put him through chemo etc. I did not want Archie to have to deal with all that either. Quality of life is really important. You are in my prayers.
Kim

I love you my dearest and sweetest little boy "Archie"
I'll be there my little soft baby!
10/27/00 - 12/13/10
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smkovalinsky
Kim:  Thank you.  Your words really help,  as I have been beating myself up a lot,  feeling that I should have been more vigilant.  I guess the Maine Coons and Persians may be more delicate,  and may not necessarily have the longevity that other cats seem to.  Once more, thank you.  You are also in my thoughts and prayers.  Susan
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donnalee
Susan, I'm so sorry for your loss of your companion and best friend, Dickie.  It saddens me to hear that you have beating yourself up lately because I'm so sure you took wonderful care of him.  I think it is our nature to second guess ourselves in this situation, but as moonglow said, animals have a way of hiding their illness.  EVEN if you had picked up on some signs, there is no guarantee that the vets would have diagnosed it right away.  I've been reading on this site for quite a while and that happens a lot!  That actually happened with my boy, Scottie.  I ended up running him from the vet to animal hospital to yet more animal hospitals as they tried to figure out what was wrong with him.   For a long time, I felt guilty for putting him through all of that...so many tests.  I still have some regret but I HAD to let the guilt go because it is not good.   With time, I just had to let the guilt go and settle in with the thought that I did what I believed was best at the time.  He knew I loved him.  It was simply his time to go home to God.  We are never ready to lose them.   I hope, with time, you will also have some peace know that you gave Dickie a wonderful life filled with love.  At the end, you did your best, you did all you could, and that Dickie knows that. 
My heart goes out to all who have written on this thread.  All of your posts really touched me.   You are all in my prayers.  Donnalee
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smkovalinsky
Donnalee:  Just waking up here,  and read your post in my email inbox.  Thank you SO much for your kind words of comfort,  and for relaying your story about your dear Scottie.  It is most appreciated,  and your kindness has helped me.  Again, thank you.
Susan
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otto12
Im so sorry for your loss. I know about the emty feeling, when my Jalle passed it was so emty in the bed he use to sleep next to me and my husband every night. Jalle died in an accident only 6 years old so I know how you feel, it was too young we  hope that they will be with us for so many years as some cats can live until they are 20. My grandparents had a cat that was 23 years when she died. I wish I could have had Jalle that long. Im so sorry for the loss of your husband, you have had to go through so much pain and I am so sorry for that.

 Just know that we are here for you and the pain will get better. When Jalle died it felt like a part of me died. We got another cat 6 months later mostly because our other cat was so lonely. Our new cat has been a blessing he has helped me alot and he now sleeps by my side every nigt. No one will or could ever take Jalles place cause he will forever have a special place in my heart and I know I will never have such a special cat again. In time when you heal you will maby get a new cat that you will learn to love. Take care, we are here for you :)
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Reilly
Oh reading this makes me cry so hard. I'm single too and lost my British Shorthair Reilly age 10 yesterday. I too had hoped for a couple of more years and his passing went quite suddenly. His sickness and death was within three days.

He always slept beside me in the bed and it's just so empty now I just don't know what to do with myself. I just want one thing right now. To have him back.

He was there for me through my divorce and so many other major life experiences. Somehow it feels like those 10 years flew by. It's not fair. 
Reilly, I will love you forever. I will see you at the Rainbow Bridge.
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