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Syd123

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Reply with quote  #1 
Yesterday was the worst day of my life. I said goodbye to my beautiful 8yr old golden retriever Colby. In the span of an hour we were told by the emergency vet that he had cancer and the tumor was bleeding causing him to be unable to breathe. They did what they could, but Colby was just so sick. We explored all options but in the end, there was nothing left that we could do. I held him in my arms and we said goodbye.
It hurts so much. He was my best friend, my everything. I can’t remember life before him and I can’t imagine life without him. My heart is so broken. I love him so much. Everything reminds me of him. I don’t know how to keep living in a world where he isn’t here. I miss him so much and a piece of me just keeps hoping this is a terrible nightmare and he’s going to come around the corner any minute. He was the best dog. I just don’t know what to do without him.
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Barri

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Reply with quote  #2 
Dear Syd,

I know how you are feeling, it is such a blow to realize they are sick and there is nothing we can do.  I was caught off guard too, but had a month of trying to help him, to no avail.  My thought are with you, please know the pain will ease over time.


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Gentlegiant

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Reply with quote  #3 
Dear Syd123,

So very sorry for the loss of your beloved Colby.

Our beautiful gentle giant (golden lab x retriever) Wally went to sleep on Jan 8, and everyday since I feel like someone has reached into my chest and ripped out my soul along with my heart!

Only those who love feel pain of loss, and though the pain will ease (so they tell me) the memory of your beautiful fur baby will live on.  Cherish those memories, let them comfort you, but try also to remember the joy it gave them to see us happy.  They wanted it then, and I'm sure they want it for us now (even though it is so hard without them with us). 

I believe one day, we will be reunited with all those we love that went before us, human and animals alike.

Hugs to you
xx
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Syd123

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Posts: 37
Reply with quote  #4 
Thank you both. It’s been so hard. Mornings and nights are so awful. There are things during the day that will remind me of him and send me into tears once again. Even finding his dog hair in the smallest of places makes me weep for him. I love him so much and miss him more than anything in this world. What I wouldn’t give for a little more time.
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Gentlegiant

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Reply with quote  #5 
Oh dear Syd123,

I soooooooooo understand that.

Once upon a time I used to think I had to vacuum the house every 5 minutes, no sooner had I cleaned up enough hair to make another dog, than there'd be even more 5 minutes later.

Now, I see a few hairs here and there, lurking in between furniture that I know will eventually disappear over time, but I wouldn't give to have my beloved Wally back, to cover me in his hair from top to toe! 

I find myself thinking, I don't want to sweep his hair up, it's all I have physically left of him.
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Syd123

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Reply with quote  #6 
I used to pull his hair off my clothes and out of my food and today I saw one strand stuck in my book. I was frozen. It really is the last physical piece left. It hurts so much that someday these hairs will be gone.
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Nacoka

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Reply with quote  #7 
I also would complain about taking Jack out in the cold or I got annoyed at him for getting into the trash, barking like a crazy dog when another dog went by. He was also very territorial so that he had to be on the lease for a while when guest came over. That really annoyed me to no end. I would take him out in the freezing weather, pick up his mess and gladly hold on to that leash for hours if I could get him back. I miss him terribly. I always will

Jack’s mom
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BrodysMama

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Reply with quote  #8 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Syd123
Yesterday was the worst day of my life. I said goodbye to my beautiful 8yr old golden retriever Colby. In the span of an hour we were told by the emergency vet that he had cancer and the tumor was bleeding causing him to be unable to breathe. They did what they could, but Colby was just so sick. We explored all options but in the end, there was nothing left that we could do. I held him in my arms and we said goodbye.
It hurts so much. He was my best friend, my everything. I can’t remember life before him and I can’t imagine life without him. My heart is so broken. I love him so much. Everything reminds me of him. I don’t know how to keep living in a world where he isn’t here. I miss him so much and a piece of me just keeps hoping this is a terrible nightmare and he’s going to come around the corner any minute. He was the best dog. I just don’t know what to do without him.
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BrodysMama

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Reply with quote  #9 
Your words resonate with me. I also lost my best friend 3 days ago and my heart is shattered. I feel the same way about my Brody as you describe feeling about Colby. I hope they found each other and are keeping each other company until we can see them again. That will be a glorious day when we get reunited with our fur babies. Please know you are not alone in feeling this way. Hugs to you. 🤗💔🐾🙏🏼
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Syd123

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Reply with quote  #10 
@Nacoka I know what you mean. When it was late at night and we’d let Colby out for one more pee he didn’t always want to come in and I’d yell at home to hurry up and he thought it was all a game he would run around and look at me to play. If only we could play that game one more time.
@Brodysmama I’m so so so sorry for the loss of your beloved Brody. It’s comforting to know I am not alone in this grief, I hope you can also take comfort in that. I’m sure they are waiting together with all the dogs who have gone before their people for the best day ever when we can hold them and hug them again.
Hugs and strength to you both
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baron297

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Reply with quote  #11 
Syd, I, too, experienced very bad news...just yesterday.  I am crushed as I have to deal with the grief of losing my favorite dog of all time.  Thoughts and prayers are with you!!
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AngelsGift

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Reply with quote  #12 
I’ve read plenty from this forum and this post really got to me. In just a few months it will be one year since we lost our 14 year old cockapoo, Angel.

Colby sounded like a wonderful dog, and I know the pain you feel, the love lost. Saying goodbye is so very hard. I’m a 53 year old man and I collapsed the pain was so severe.

I have a stone that bears her name in my backyard, and I talk to her often. My love for her will never go away.

Take heart.. Colby is always there. Talk it out, tell them what you feel. You’ll never stop loving them, nor will they ever stop loving you.

One day we’ll see them again. In the meantime, the love you feel honors them and gives you the peace you need to move on.
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Syd123

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Reply with quote  #13 
Today marks 1 week. It’s not any easier, just less socially acceptable to grieve. When a person dies there are certain grieving customs that we all follow to mourn and have closure. There is no such thing for our dogs. Many people try and diminish the pain “he’s just a dog” or simply don’t understand the pain. The other day as I walked up the steps into my home I felt a glimmer of the excitement and happiness that I always felt moments before opening the door to be greeted by my crying happy Colby. It’s not that I forgot he was gone, but something about coming home made me expect to see him. I’ve heard some people dream about their pets. If I could hold him or even just see him in my dream, it would make my heart so happy.
@Angelsgift thank you for your kind words and I am so so sorry for the loss of your beloved Angel girl. I know how special these best friends are and losing them truly makes your body weak. I talk to Colby all the time like he’s there like I always did. It helps believing that he hears me and knows that I love him. I believe we will see our beautiful perfect best friends again someday and that they will be waiting for us with happy hearts.
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tazmoe

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Reply with quote  #14 
Wow I lost my Kona at 8 years old too, and with a very similar experience as yours. I went to the vet thinking Kona had some minor infection. Unfortunately it turned out his kidneys were pretty much gone. We had a couple options but in the end letting him go was the kindest and most humane decision.

Sorry for your loss and I hope things get better.
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Brownie74

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Reply with quote  #15 
So sorry for the loss of your Colby. Its so very overwhelming and heartbreaking to let our babies go, especially as we had to.. My Brownie was rushed to the E R and wuthin hours we had to let him go. He was on oxygen. His heart was enlarged and he had an underlying condition that just couldn't work. He was blue and would go through these attacks they said. Collapse tracheal very minor but breathing would be worse. So i had to let him go. He was 9 i miss him so much.. Yes its very hard and traumatic to go through thus but for them living with the condition would b worse on them. Almost 5 months my heart will be broken forever. We learn to live with it, as hard as it it. Your Colby loves you still and walks by you each day. Pick out a nice plant or flower in memory for him . I wish you healing and send prayers. Sincerely Jessica n Brownie
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My boy, Brownie
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