I'm so sorry for your loss of your Ruby and your pain. I have been through this pain many x and I can tell you there is no magic formula. Each time is different with each relationship. We either make the decision to eventually love again or we decide we can't bear the pain of losing another. Right now I feel it would be disrespectful to Wiz to love another, but I know HE would not want me to live without love and support. He loved me more than anything in the world. I'm sure Ruby feels the same, she doesn't want you to be unhappy. And if you had passed she would grief very deeply but she would still enjoy her life I'm sure and share her love with others.
When I was 16 my beloved Mitzi, beagle girlie pie who I used to sleep with on a basket chair with when I was 3 years old and who was my first soul mate and life long best friend and confidante passed. I cried for months on an off. So not all teenagers are uncaring or immune to grief. In fact I think everyone of every age deals with grief in their own way. Sometimes it is too painful and people shut off to it. For a long time I shut myself off to memories of Mitzi I think because it was too painful but when I was a young adult, I found that kind of love again with Tess, a little tortie cat, she taught me to love again deeply. Recently I have had crystal sculptures made of my babies and had one made of me and my brother at the beach with Mitzi when I was 3 years old. I find myself feeling that numbness with wiz leaving me but it's not an indifference by any means. I certainly feel the grief harder than the rest of my family to the point that I conceal it from them at times because I don't want to upset them. I know they know how much I'm suffering and I know they miss and love Wiz a great deal too. Maybe try talking to your children and explain your feelings to them, at least they will have some idea of what you're going through. Take care and hugs to you.
My beloved sweet Tess August 1999 - February 21 2001
My beloved loyal Byron March 1998 - April 28 2008 My sweet beloved girlie Angelina April 2001- September 2012 Me & my sweet beloved Wizberry forever 1998- April 21, 2016 My sweet beloved Snow Goddess Sybil girlie April 2001- May 11,2018