63B4AFE6-2DAE-4498-8AC5-D4F02DBEFBD8.jpeg  It was a week ago yesterday I lost the love of my life of 15 years. I feel I cannot breathe when the wave of reality hits me I will never hold him close to me or feel him next to me. The pain is unbearable. Everyone says time heals I can’t imagine how I’m going to be ok without Bud in my life anymore. He was it my best friend my kid my family my soul mate. I literally don’t even know how to eat or go to the bathroom without him. Looking for any help I can get to help me not give up on trying to survive without him. 
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I am so terribly sorry for your loss and I can feel your pain and it feels like my pain.  We lost our dog, Quincy a little over a month ago and I honestly am surprised I am still seems impossible that time just keeps passing somehow. We have no children and Quincy was like my child...I am completely lost without him and I'm not sure if I will ever be the same person.

I also wanted to say that that is a beautiful picture that you shared and he looks like a very happy pup that was loved very deeply.

I have no words of wisdom but maybe it helps just a little to know that everyone here understands drowning in grief.

Take care of yourself and hugs.
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I send you my sincere condolences on the loss of your beloved Bud..That is a lovely photo of the two of you, I can see by looking at it how connected you both were. He looks like such a gentle soul.

This forum has been a godsend to myself and so many others, it will help you. It is full of warmth. You are in the early stages of grief & I know how you are feeling - it just doesn't seem real when our pets leave us & the void is unbearable. Just be gentle with yourself & cry, shout or scream as much as you need to. Just let the tears flow. When my Chihuahua 'Daisy' passed I would wander the city alone,  all day and all night crying because I couldn't face coming home without her there.  We lived alone together & she was 15 too. A little while after, I came across a pet loss helpline ( given to me by my vet on the day my Daisy was given euthanasia)& afterwards this forum which have both helped me so much, I also found a lovely scrapbook which was especially designed for dogs ( coincidently only 1 left on the shelf too, just what I was looking for ) & I have been filling it in, writing down wonderful memories of her, like things we did, things she liked to eat, things she got for xmas, & lots more. There is space to stick in pictures too. Along with this I read a wonderful, charming book called "Goodbye pet and see you in heaven" by Bel Mooney, had the initial D for Daisy tattooed on the back on my neck & have donated to various animal charities in Daisy's name. Doing little things like this have been helpful to me on my journey & although the pain still feels unbearable at times I feel like she is living through me, & I feel fiercely proud that she was mine! She passed at 15 years too just like your Bud & no matter how old they were or what the circumstances were it doesn't ease the pain.  I lived alone with her and she was my entire world. I understand how you are feeling at this moment & time but please keep posting  It will help you. 

Sending you comfort & peace

( Daisy's mum)
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