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luvdaisy

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Posts: 3
Reply with quote  #1 
I found this forum while doing a search on google about pet loss. It seems I turn to the internet when I don't know what to do about something. My 19 year old daughter's Cocker Spaniel angel died this morning. It was very sudden. She had problems wth arthritis, and a soft mass on her stomach, but other than that she was fine. Yesterday morning she had some clear vomiting, and seemed weak. She had done this before, and was okay. In the early hours of the morning, she suddenly got worse, and we found her lying on the floor, unable to get up, and barely hold her head up. Her breathing was very hard, and we covered her up on her bed, trying to make her feel better, and figure out what to do, and what could be wrong. It wasn't long after that she stopped breathing.
Daisy was 10 1/2 years old, and my daughter has spent over half of her life with her. I don't know how she is going to deal with this. I am grieving for our beloved Daisy, and for the pain that I know my daughter is in. I am just at a loss right now as to what to do. We are having her cremated, but this pain is terrible. I will get through this, but Daisy was my daughter's constant companion, she slept with her, and never left her side. I hate that my daughter has to feel this pain right before Christmas.
I know there is nothing that I can do that will make her feel better right now, but what can I do to comfort her?

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luvdaisy

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Reply with quote  #2 
I just wanted to pop in again, but I know there hasn't been enough time for any replies to my post.
I didn't know I would take it this hard. My daughter is with my mom right now, and I'm home alone with my youngest, who is four. It is starting to sink in even more, that Daisy is gone, and my heart is breaking.
It hasn't been a very good few years for us. My husband left me and our four kids a few years ago, and I have had to struggle just to make it. I work in arts and crafts, and sell things on the internet. I work non-stop, some nights I don't even sleep. I worked my butt off the last couple of months, so that I would be able to spend a week before, and a week after Christmas to spend with the kids, and have no work to do. My kids are everything to me. I so wanted this to be a Happy Christmas, and not a sad one. I'm in no way blaming our poor little Daisy, nothing is her fault at all. We all loved her so much. It's like her death has brought everything else out into the open as well, feelings that have been kept suppressed. I am so worried about my daughter that I don't know what to do.
I've been looking on the internet for memorial gift ideas for her. What do some of you suggest? A realistic plush Cocker Spaniel? Or maybe a locket that holds her picture? I cut a lock of her fur, tied it with a pink ribbon and placed it in an envelope. I so much want to do something that will help. I'm sorry if it sounds as if I might be babbling, but I am just beside myself. I have always tried to "fix" things for my kids, but this time I can't "fix" it and make it better.


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CarolW

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Reply with quote  #3 
I so understand your sadness and grief, I lost my best friend, my 15 year old collie, just 6 days back and my life seems to have turned upside down. Maybe I cry less each day but the pain is just as bad and my heart just as broken. Over the years I have lost the dogs that I live for and there are 2 things that bring me comfort, let me share them. If you have not already done so, check out the rainbow bridge poem. Yes, it will make you cry, but it IS beautiful. And also, you could create a star for Daisy onto the gonetodogstar web site. Here, I have 4 collies, and whenever I want to, I can go to their page and I see the twinkling star that represents them. I truly believe that our pets stay with us, lying in the same places, looking lovingly at us... we just cannot physically see them. I am still walking round my house talking to Bo-Bo as if she is here. If she is here in spirit, I would like her to still feel a part of our family. I do hope you remain strong not only for yourself, but for your family. Time will help you come to terms and remember Daisy with affection and a smile. It may take time, but trust me, you will get there.
Take care.
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jasminesmom

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Reply with quote  #4 
luvdaisy

Let me begin by saying how sorry I am for your loss. I lost my beloved Jasmine 09-04-09 and I can tell you, this has been the most devestating time in my life. Jasmine was there to open the gate of The Rainbow Bridge for Daisy and helped her find her way around.  But even though I still grieve for Jasmine, even though the void is still there, the guilt is ever present, each day does seem to get better. I still tear up when I realize she is not here with me. I still cannot say her name out loud. We buried her in her favorite spot in the flower garden, and I visit her daily.

Your beloved Daisy will always remain in your heart. As mothers will do our very best to always 'fix' things but we cannot. It is not in our power, but coming here to The Rainbow Bridge, talking here with others about Daisy, does help ease the burdens you are carrying. In time you will realize that Daisey is now your guardian Angel, at The Bridge free from pain, and one day you will be with her again. This is what has helped me thru.

Know that you, your daughter and family are in my prayers and thoughts as your continue to mourn the loss of your Daisey. We are here to help you.

Hugs.

Cheryl and Angel Jasmine
Jasmine was loved
Jasmine took ProIn
Jasmine is gone
http://RainbowsBridge.com/residents/JAMIN001/Resident.htm


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Cheryl and Angel Jasmine
Jasmine was loved
Jasmine was given ProIn
Jasmine is now gone
http://RainbowsBridge.com/residents/JAMIN001/Resident.htm

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luvdaisy

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Posts: 3
Reply with quote  #5 
Thank you so much for all the kind words and support. It really means alot to me. Except for our immediate family, I don't think anyone else we know fully understands how we feel. So it does help to come here and talk to others who have been through this.
Last night was hard, and my daughter is taking it pretty hard. She says it will help some when we have Daisy's ashes back here with us. It will be a few days until we have them back. I decided that it would be best to keep doing normal things. I am trying to keep my daughter from staying locked in her room so much, and come out with us and watch tv, and wrap Christmas gifts.
My other children went in my daughter's room, cleaned, and rearranged the furniture for her. It seems to help that the room looks different from what it did when Daisy passed away in there.
There are so many things we miss about her. I keep thinking about her fluffy curly ears, her big beautiful eyes, and her furry paws. And the sound of her toenails clicking across the floor, I miss the little pitter patter of her little doggy feet. Daisy was a beautiful cocker spaniel, she had the most perfect round head. She had the most beautiful cream colored fur. She was so precious to us, and always will be.

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Gabby

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Reply with quote  #6 
Hi,
I am so very sorry about the loss of your Daughters Pup Angel,a loss at anytime of the year is bad enough,but at a time that there is so much merriment going on,it somehow makes it even harder to swallow.
What a very long life she had for a little Cocker,not that it makes us feel any better,because we want them around for ever then one day more.
Angel was at such an age,that if you likened it to a Human Child they may well have grown up and left home.Its a very long time to share a fur love,and I know from my own life's experiences with Furries that it leaves a huge hole in our lifes and hearts.I'm glad that you took a little of Angels fur,perhaps your Daughter would like that in a little locket,or a little of it with a picture.Maybe in time she will choose her way to tribute Angel.Perhaps as you say an Ornament Cocker or when the better weather comes a special place in the Garden?There are lots of options.
I would just like to leave my sympathys to you all.And say your love was built over such a long time,that it will take time to come to terms with dear Angels absence.Have hope,it does get better.
You are in my thoughts and Prayers for healing.
Fairy kisses for your sweet Angel xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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Love and Light
and
Fairy Kisses for your precious Baby xxxxxx
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Mary

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Posts: 6
Reply with quote  #7 
It doesn't seem strange to me that repressed painful feelings come to the fore at a time like this. You are working yourself half to death, and the death of you little girl's puppy seems so cruel and heartless, almost as if it were your ex husband's fault somehow. I know you are suffering over the loss too, but if can try and 'keep your cool', the pain WILL eventually ease, possible within days, and those suppresed emotions will also fade back to where they safely were before.
One sure cure is to get her another puppy. Kids heal faster then we do. She has to be ready, but seems like in this case, it would be a great solution. Maybe take her to the shelter to find one, or as is often the case, one will find you. God bless you. You sound like a wonderful mom.
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tikidikidoo

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Posts: 46
Reply with quote  #8 
My heart breaks for you. I am so sorry for your loss. I do know that when I have lost a beloved pet it has given me comfort to have something to keep their memory close. I do think your daughter would appreciate a locket with Daisy's picture inside or something similar. I have made it a bit of a tradition to make a necklace with beads spelling the name of the one I have lost which I wear until I receive their ashes and then I place them in front of the urn. This helps me and perhaps it will help you and your daughter too. I also agree that, when you feel ready, you should open up your home to a new animal needing the love and care you can give to it. My husband and I live in a home with more than one animal and I have to say in my times of loss I have found the most profound comfort in the prescence of my other "kids." I know Daisy can never be replaced but to provide a loving home to an animal so needing it would be a beautiful way to honor Daisy's memory. You have a hard road ahead of you as you are dealing with your own pain at the loss of Daisy and your daughter's pain. Take the time you need to honour Daisy's memory. This is a very important part of the healing and cannot be rushed. Know that in time with will become more bearable. I tell you this from experience. Time is the only thing that heals. Tears turn into happy, though bittersweet, memories. There are people thinking of you and keeping you in their prayers.
x Tiki
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