Our baby Myshkin passed away 2 days ago. He had come home as a 8 old week English Cocker Spaniel puppy exactly at 9.15 am - six and half years ago. And he left us the same time. He developed an immune condition IMT triggered by tic fever. Within 2 weeks he was gone. We tried to give him best possible medical care and he also fought bravely. Fortunately he didnt suffer pain except last one hour. But nature took its course.

There is a big vaccume in us. Breathing, looking, walking, eating, sleeping, watching TV, reading- everything is associated with him. Tears come relentlessly and his face is there everytime we close our eyes.

What is burning bright in our body and soul though is the tremendous positivity he taught us. I will give an example. He hated walking in monsoons because he hated walking in watery puddles. It also meant he would need to be toweled when he came back. Initially he used to hate being to zoom.jpeg  weled dry. He wanted to dry himself on our bed. But we would sit him down and towel him dry as he tried to get away and growl and protest. Eventually, after 2 years of this routine - 4 months of heavy monsoons in Bombay- he reversed the ritual. He made it into playtime. He would look forward to towelling. As soon as we would enter the lift to come home from walk- we would coo- Towelling? Towelling? And he would be quivering in anticipation. He would get impatient as we unlocked door and run towards the towel. He would jump in our lap as we sat down with towel and play furiously as he was being towelled. Then he would jump all over the hourse, bark at piegons on balcony, force us to play a tugging game, demand cottage cheese ( his fav). He made what he didn’t like into an enjoyable activity. A celebration. Same thing he did with activities like removing his tics, brushing his fur.

We changed when he came in our life. We also looked at things in playful manner. We both were brooding, intense types. But he taught us to enjoy the moment more than any self help can. He lived by example and his trememndous energy burns in our souls. Making us better animals.

I can write perhaps novel length on him. His antics, his beauty, his adventures, his eccentricities, how he touched lives of everyone he came in contact with.  but I wanted the first post on him to let him know how profoundly he changed us. For better.

I will post more and more when tears allow me to.

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Does anyone else feel need to just sleep? 
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Please accept my deepest condolences on the loss of your beloved Myshkyn. He is a very handsome boy! This is a tremendous loss for you and all of the sad emotions you described are normal unfortunately but it is just lovely how you have shared all of the positivity Myshkyn brought into your lives. How wonderful! I look forward to hearing more about your dear boy when you feel up to writing again. Meanwhile I do hope you can get some rest. It's such a difficult time for you and your family. Take Care!
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I am very sorry for your loss.  He is adorable - I could look at his picture for an eternity....and never get tired.  His eyes are so expressive. What a beautiful fur baby
Words cannot express the emptiness of their absence.  I am sorry that you and your family are suffering.  Grief is a very painful journey. But, you are not alone, we all understand your pain.  Hugs
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Thank you both for your kind words. We are trying to cope.
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I am so sorry for the loss of your Myshkin. The pain of losing my babies sometimes hits me like a sledgehammer and it literally paralyzes me so I know what you are going through. I'm sorry we all have to suffer when we lose our fur babies, but venting does help. I wish you peace and know that all of us here understand your pain and wish you the best.

(Max & Bailey's mommy)
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