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normsmom

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Reply with quote  #31 
MJ,

It is so thoughtful of you to check in and it means so much to me. My world seems to be just marching on around me, and it's wonderful to have somebody who understands and checks in and knows that I'm nowhere close to being okay yet. Thank you so very much. Honestly it's still so hard. Now the reality is setting in and the numbness is wearing off and that's a whole new kind of sadness that comes with it. I'm giving Tucker extra love and attention and we're going on lots of adventurous walks to keep him busy and content, but my heart isn't in much else. I feel as if I'm going through the motions, in slow motion.

I take great comfort in reading through stories like yours and others here because I recognize the initial heartbreak so well, and can take comfort in how you are able to still think so often and so fondly of your pet, and see that the happy memories start to become more prominent as time goes on. I never want to think of Norm any less than I do now, but it would pretty darn swell if it didn't hurt so badly when I do. Thank you so much for checking in. 


Quote:
Originally Posted by Bailey15
Oh Heather, It's so obvious from your posts and those beautiful pictures of Norm that you gave him an incredible life! I wanted to check in and see how you are doing. I know it's been such a short time and you must be thinking of Norm so often. 😔 I do think Bailey would be happy that we adopted Charlie. Thanks for saying that Heather - it's such a nice thought!! Thinking of you and Tucker (and your beautiful Norm) and sending hugs, MJ ❤️
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normsmom

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Reply with quote  #32 
Please do not apologize at all!!!! You show so much kindness to others here, even as you deal with your own grief. I am slowly making my way through the stories of others and posting when I can... there are so many beautiful tributes and likeminded people here. It is wonderful. That's how I came upon your thread about your Maggs Muffin and your Sweet Pea. Your words to your girls are so touching and heartfelt. It warms my heart to know that there are people in this world who care so deeply for their animals and remember them with such beautiful words and tributes. I look forward to reading more about your girls.

Thank you for all the support you give to others here and for leaving such a kind note on my thread. You said in one of your early posts "we talked without talking" and that is exactly what my bond with my sweet Norm was like. I really am inconsolable as you so aptly put it. Thank you for understanding how deeply this hurt can run. It's been almost two weeks as I feel as shattered as I did the moment I said goodbye to him. Maybe even more so, as the reality is starting to set in that my life now doesn't have my sweet boy in it. Thank you for your reassurance that he is still here with me. I want to believe that with every fibre of my being. To think otherwise is truly unbearable right now. I will continue to talk to him and light his candle.

As for Tucker, I think you are right that he is hiding his heartbreak. Sometimes I feel he doesn't know what has happened, and other times I feel he does, but he definitely knows something is amiss. I am trying to be extra loving for him and keep him busy with walks and toys and treats. I hate to think that his sweet little heart is broken too. 


Quote:
Originally Posted by CKMP
Norm's Mom
I am so very very sorry for your loss of your sweet boy Norm...My goodness he is so so beautiful - and the photo of him lounging on the sofa speaks volumes of his deep contentment and security within the circle of your love...I also apologize deeply for not writing on Norm's thread sooner...there are no excuses - only that perhaps grief makes me far too 'selfish' and unaware...Thank you so much too for leaving a very kind message on Maggee's and now Kassee's thread...

It is a loss that has no comparisons - to loss a so beloved furred companion leaves that ache, that hole, that hollowness that will forever be there as the one that filled it is no longer
physically with us...It is a hurt that is incomprehensible and a grief that really is inconsolable - a grief that does not really diminish with time...We only perhaps learn how to live with that sorrow and loss...Your beautiful Norm will never leave your side - a bond forged between human and pup is a bond that is unbreakable, a bond that transcends time, space and physicality.  You two had that bond when Norm romped by your side in the snow and will continue to have that bond...Talk to Norm... and watch out for your other pup even more now - pups tend to 'hide' those broken hearts' too...
Days become too long, thoughts try to outrun 'guilt' and the 'maybes' and tears try to 'wash' down the bitter reality we face...No words can really prepare us for this, and no words can really take away the sorrow...
Norm is near by - he knows you are his forever Mom, and would never leave you...Those inexplainable, unusual occurrences are indeed a heavenly pup working diligently to remind you he hears your voice, sees you and walks with you each day.  Take care Norm's Mom - every 10th Norm will be remembered...May you have a moment or two of calm within your heart as you just know your Norm is with you...and has come to touch your heart with his love and warmth to remind you he is still your best boy...He is with you each morning as the candle lights - still a special moment together....Many hugs...
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jimmy17

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Reply with quote  #33 
Hi Heather - just thought I`d check in to see how you are.  I know its still "early days" for you, and while the reality has probably kicked in, I know that your world is still reeling from the shock of your loss.  Learning to adjust to a different routine is one of the hardest things ever - I remember feeling that my purpose in life had been taken away, as Jim got older I spent more and more time attending to all his needs, and then all of a sudden that was gone.    But the one thing that never leaves is that unbreakable bond that we share with them - it took me quite a while to realise that Jim is still with me - just as Norm will always be with you.        I just love the photos of him, it is obvious that you gave him such a loving and happy life - and that`s all our sweet soul mates ever wanted...    Take care,

                                                                                           Big hugs, Jackie.

    

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normsmom

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Reply with quote  #34 
Jackie,

Thank you so much for checking in. It means so much to me and helps me to not feel so alone. Tomorrow will be two weeks without my sweet Norm, and the pain is still so, so raw. I think you described it in another thread as "a punch in the stomach." Yes. That exactly. Like your Jim, Norm definitely had some caretaking needs as he got older - medications and weekly appointments for laser therapy for his hips at the vet, lifting him onto the bed because he couldn't jump up, making sure he had fresh tennis balls and special treats for the days he was feeling sore... I miss taking care of him very much. BTW - I just love the name "Jim" and his eyes are so knowing and wise - I can definitely tell he was a soul dog for you. Thank you for checking in on me. Hopefully one day I will be able to respond with "I'm doing better", but for now, just know that the kindness here is helping so much.

Quote:
Originally Posted by jimmy17
Hi Heather - just thought I`d check in to see how you are.  I know its still "early days" for you, and while the reality has probably kicked in, I know that your world is still reeling from the shock of your loss.  Learning to adjust to a different routine is one of the hardest things ever - I remember feeling that my purpose in life had been taken away, as Jim got older I spent more and more time attending to all his needs, and then all of a sudden that was gone.    But the one thing that never leaves is that unbreakable bond that we share with them - it took me quite a while to realise that Jim is still with me - just as Norm will always be with you.        I just love the photos of him, it is obvious that you gave him such a loving and happy life - and that`s all our sweet soul mates ever wanted...    Take care,

                                                                                           Big hugs, Jackie.

    
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normsmom

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Reply with quote  #35 
46041_460372537068_1322810_n.jpg  58063_10150106641707069_6452018_n.jpg  69850_485374297068_4608470_n.jpg  154133_10150092995222069_3587008_n.jpg  182875_10150135987062069_6134842_n.jpg  338516_10151350100167069_858683984_o.jpg  406183_10150572229327069_147374975_n.jpg  820656_10151448098352069_107027973_o.jpg  1909889_62265382068_1623_n.jpg  1930301_34315617068_2805_n.jpg 
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jimmy17

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Reply with quote  #36 
Heather - what beautiful photos of Norm, such a handsome boy and how the camera loves him.   You can see he has such a zest for life - like "Look at me Mum - I`m having a wonderful time! ".    Even through the grief, you can be very proud that you gave this lovely boy a fantastic life - a life full of joy and happiness.   He really does remind me so much of Jim - those eyes, and knowing that here is one happy boy!  I know you are missing him so very much - but he is always with you, always by your side bonded forever.  

                                                                                     Peace and hugs, Jackie.

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Shark88

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Reply with quote  #37 
I can tell that Norm was very special.  He is also a beauty.     Every pet owner would be so lucky to have a dog like your Norm.   When it comes to
any doubts and fears in life, put your trust in God.   The Almighty hears the prayers of those who seek Him.  
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Molly_Beagle_Mom_4ever

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Reply with quote  #38 
Hi Norm's Mom, What a beautiful boy! I love all of your photos. I'm so sorry for your loss of dear Norm and know how difficult it is to lose a best little friend. It's been a year since I lost my sweet Molly Beagle. The pain is so sharp, and life feels empty. I hope you're feeling a bit better each day as Norm fills your heart with love, and I wish you peace and healing during this difficult journey. Please know there are many friends here with you, and Norm is always still near. He will send you beautiful signs to help you see and feel him close. Lots of warm hugs to you, Norm and Tucker from me and Molly.

Dawn...Molly's Mom

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Love you infinitely our little Molly. Forever and ever XOXO
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Bailey15

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Reply with quote  #39 
Hi Heather,
Thinking of you today: 2 weeks since you had to say Good bye (for now) to your beautiful Norm. 😔
I loved looking at all of the wonderful pictures you've posted! In every one, Norm's love of life, and most of all his happiness, shine through! It looks like he and Tucker were great pals and I agree that Tucker likely is really missing him so it's it's good that you can comfort each other.
When you described the care you gave Norm as he got older it took me back. Bailey needed more care in his senior years as well, with meds and injections each week for arthritis. I remember when he would wake in the morning, he made a funny little sound (that I still think I hear sometimes) to let me know I should come and lift him down. It was something I loved to do for him. Heather, I think we lost our precious boys on the same date: November 10. I will always remember that day. The weather was so beautiful for November (even though it all seemed surreal) and we took took Bailey to the waterfront one last time. I also found that the numbness you describe (afterward) was a blessing but then, as it started to wear off, the pain was excruciating. I'm so sorry you are going through that. Allow yourself to grieve as much as you need to as it is an important part of the healing. It does get easier with time but we have a special place in our hearts that will always belong to Norm and Bailey. ❤️
I know it will be a difficult day for you. Hoping all your beautiful memories of Norm will bring you comfort today!
Hugs, MJ
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MyBella

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Reply with quote  #40 
Hi Heather,

Thinking of you on your second week without your beautiful and extremely handsome Norm. I am so proud of you Heather, you are so early in your grief, your own heart so broken, yet you have found the strength to reach out to others with such wonderful touching words of support, such a beautiful way to honor your beautiful boy.
Speaking of your beautiful boy. Wow !!! Are these photos of Norm so wonderful, I love how comfortable and happy Norm is in the snow, his face says it all. On the other page, there is the photo of Norm chasing you (I believe??) in the snow and these ones above here with your handsome boy enjoying the snow along with the water. Oh man Heather these are fantastic photos, thank you so much for sharing them, I love them all.
Is that a cat in the background with Norm "smiling" for the camera, if so, that is one big cat.
But the one photo that really touched my heart (they all touch my heart of course), but this one with Norm swimming.
IMG_0709.jpg

This photo has so much to it, this may be the best photo I have ever seen. The way Norm is swimming with his leash dragging behind him, he is making his own wake in the water, swimming towards the beautiful light as it cascades a path for him. Norm has no fear at all, as I suspect he knows he is surrounded by the light of Angels from above, Angels that will forever keep him safe on his many travels and adventures. What an absolutely beautiful and heart touching photo.
Thank you for sharing these wonderful photos of your happy handsome boy. Thank you for your touching words of support on little girl's thread, it is so appreciated and extremely helpful...thank you Heather.
Sending my warmest wishes for the beautiful light and love of your handsome Norm to always warm your heart. Wishing for nothing but peace and healing to you.

In Friendship, Don


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MissingRuffalo92917

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Reply with quote  #41 
Hi Norms Mom!

First off I just want to say I have so many emotions reading what you wrote, you said every word I was having such a hard time trying to dig to find and say it so well. I typically lay in bed late at night while my husband sleeps because the sadness consumes me and I google everything I can think of to try and help me cope for the next day. These last 2 months have been horrid. Last night God finally let me stumble across this website and I am just in awe, so many people like me who just “get it”. I will utilize this for as long as I possibly can In hopes to heal.
Here’s Ruffalos story;
We rescued Ruffalo at 6 weeks old from a shelter,
We seen him online and instantly fell in love (he was a lab/Great Dane mix).Everything was pretty normal up until about 6 month and he had a episode of his 3rd eyelids flaring up out of nowhere, being first time pet owners we panicked, we assured this was just an allergy flare up and to give him Benadryl. About a week in a half later it was gone and he was back to his happy self, praise Jesus! Then a little after his birthday in June of this year I noticed his eyes started to get a little swollen again however, it was only his left eye that the pink skin would poke out(not near as bad as the first instance) so we started the Benadryl when we noticed it and it faded away once again. Then August 24th we came home from lunch and his eyes were horrible again, called the vet got him in that afternoon and that’s where the nightmare begins. That day they looked in his eyes to make sure he didn’t scratch it or have anything in it and of course there wasn’t so we started a steroid and antibiotic and had a follow up appointment the next week. The week came and gone and his eye didn’t get any better, our vet was stunned so we tried a different antibiotic and eye drops and followed up again. Went back the next week due to it not getting any better. Our vet was baffled, she stated that possibly they would need to sedate him so they could get a really good look in his eye and make sure they weren’t missing anything. A couple hours later we got a call stating there was a mass under his eye and they though a biopsy should be done there and on the inside of his mouth. We did it and this is where our sad story really begins. A week later we got the dreaded call, Ruffalo had aggressive carcinoma of the nasal passages. We were referred to Blue Pearl and we made our appointment. The week wait though was miserable, watching my baby boy slowing decline killed me but I had hope. We went to get a second opinion from a specialist in another city and we got somewhat good news, he said what our boy had was not good but since he was so young and healthy other than the cancer he thought we could try to beat this thing. He commend us for being so proactive and gave us his best wishes. Ruffalo would not eat nor would he hardly drink a think so I knew this was not a good sign but I still had hope in my heart that they said if his chest x-ray was clear we could start his chemo right away. So we got in the car bright and early that morning and headed on our journey and journey I didn’t know I wouldn’t return without my baby. We found out he lungs were riddled with tumors and he was in so much pain. How selfish did I feel, how did I not know that all this time my baby was hurting. I completely lost it. I knew in that very moment I wasn’t returning home with my boy. Such a long drive home and out his big old head laying in my lap I already dreaded it and we hadn’t even spoken about our next steps. The doctor for some reason, I don’t know if it was my panic stricken face of confusion or disbelief took us to the back room and showed us his x-rays and it was unbelievable how bad it was. Once he confirmed he was literally fighting for air we knew we had to euthanize (I really wanted to put him back in the car and go home) my husband is the logical one though and said that wouldn’t be fair to him. They took us to a room after they got his IV in and we just spent time with him for about an hour and he just paced back a fourth looking for ways out and it broke my heart because he just wanted to go home. I could have stayed with him for hours but there were a couple of times he sounded like he stopped breathing and I was so scared I just didn’t want him to hurt anymore. So the next thing is what haunts me to this day and this is what is causing a lot of my emotional stress and anxiety..I was in the room when my sweet boy passed. And right when they put the first dose of medicine in his he turned back and looked at me (could be because I was crying hysterically) and had these pouting eyes and I just don’t know if he was looking at me as “please don’t cry momma” or “why are you guys doing this to me” but after he looked at me like that me husband and I got down on the floor on the blankets and just held our boy and cried our eyes out until the doctor said he has no heart beat. It was an experience I wouldn’t take back but something that I don’t think I was mentally prepared for. Then when we left the doctor opened Ruffalos eyes and I turned to give one last glanced at my baby and I just saw then emptiness and it hurts. We had him cremated and his paw print molded into a plaque. It’s just this hurt and pain consumes me so much I am unable to live my life, my chest is tight, I cry all the time, I miss my boy and not a lot of people get it. I pray for everyone who is struggling with his hurt

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normsmom

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Reply with quote  #42 
Jackie - thank you. I appreciate your kinds words, knowing that you are missing sweet Jimmy so much too. Thanks for saying that about his zest for life. Even in his later years, he didn't let a little pain stop him from enjoying every moment. I am so glad I have so many photos of him to remember the life we had together. As you said, we are definitely bonded forever. 

Quote:
Originally Posted by jimmy17
Heather - what beautiful photos of Norm, such a handsome boy and how the camera loves him.   You can see he has such a zest for life - like "Look at me Mum - I`m having a wonderful time! ".    Even through the grief, you can be very proud that you gave this lovely boy a fantastic life - a life full of joy and happiness.   He really does remind me so much of Jim - those eyes, and knowing that here is one happy boy!  I know you are missing him so very much - but he is always with you, always by your side bonded forever.  

                                                                                     Peace and hugs, Jackie.
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normsmom

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Reply with quote  #43 
Thank you Shark88. He was a very special boy indeed.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Shark88
I can tell that Norm was very special.  He is also a beauty.     Every pet owner would be so lucky to have a dog like your Norm.   When it comes to
any doubts and fears in life, put your trust in God.   The Almighty hears the prayers of those who seek Him.  
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normsmom

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Reply with quote  #44 
Dawn,

Thank you so much for your kind message. Thank you especially for these words:

"Please know there are many friends here with you, and Norm is always still near. He will send you beautiful signs to help you see and feel him close."

I am so grateful I found this forum, and I can't tell you how much comfort it has brought to some of the worst days of my life. I will keep looking for those signs.

Oh, and I saw on your thread that birthday wishes are in order for Miss Molly. I love her photos. Her eyes are so expressive and wise.

Warm hugs to you on this special birthday day.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Molly_Beagle_Mom_4ever
Hi Norm's Mom, What a beautiful boy! I love all of your photos. I'm so sorry for your loss of dear Norm and know how difficult it is to lose a best little friend. It's been a year since I lost my sweet Molly Beagle. The pain is so sharp, and life feels empty. I hope you're feeling a bit better each day as Norm fills your heart with love, and I wish you peace and healing during this difficult journey. Please know there are many friends here with you, and Norm is always still near. He will send you beautiful signs to help you see and feel him close. Lots of warm hugs to you, Norm and Tucker from me and Molly. Dawn...Molly's Mom
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normsmom

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Reply with quote  #45 

Oh wow! Yes, November 10th!

It sounds like you had a lovely last day with Bailey. It's surreal how the sun can shine and the world can keep spinning even though it's the worst day imaginable. 

Because of stories like yours and kindness here, I do believe it will get better with time, but admittedly that's hard to imagine right now. I am trying to take comfort in the good memories. I bought a beautiful journal tonight that I will begin writing memories in, and I've got a slideshow of his photos set up on my phone that I watch from time to time (and cry my eyes out). I do this when Tucker isn't around so that I don't upset him.

I hope you are having a great weekend with Charlie. No doubt Bailey is close by too in your heart and in your thoughts. ❤️

Hugs,

Heather

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bailey15
Hi Heather, Thinking of you today: 2 weeks since you had to say Good bye (for now) to your beautiful Norm. 😔 I loved looking at all of the wonderful pictures you've posted! In every one, Norm's love of life, and most of all his happiness, shine through! It looks like he and Tucker were great pals and I agree that Tucker likely is really missing him so it's it's good that you can comfort each other. When you described the care you gave Norm as he got older it took me back. Bailey needed more care in his senior years as well, with meds and injections each week for arthritis. I remember when he would wake in the morning, he made a funny little sound (that I still think I hear sometimes) to let me know I should come and lift him down. It was something I loved to do for him. Heather, I think we lost our precious boys on the same date: November 10. I will always remember that day. The weather was so beautiful for November (even though it all seemed surreal) and we took took Bailey to the waterfront one last time. I also found that the numbness you describe (afterward) was a blessing but then, as it started to wear off, the pain was excruciating. I'm so sorry you are going through that. Allow yourself to grieve as much as you need to as it is an important part of the healing. It does get easier with time but we have a special place in our hearts that will always belong to Norm and Bailey. ❤️ I know it will be a difficult day for you. Hoping all your beautiful memories of Norm will bring you comfort today! Hugs, MJ

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