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normsmom

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Reply with quote  #1 
My dearest, sweetest man,

Norm.

I miss you so very much. The ache is unbearable. Gut-wrenching. I feel empty. Gutted. Heartbroken. Lost without my faithful friend.

Our relationship was one of the most important things in my life. And you understood me in a way no human did. We understood each other. You were such a special bond for me and now I feel untethered. 

I have been walking some of your favourite trails with Tucker since we said goodbye to you Friday night and it helps a bit but at the same time makes me miss you more. The ache is so raw.

I don't know how to go on without your sweet face looking inquisitively at me as I sing to you or talk to you. I'm lucky that Tucker is still here to take care of. I don't think he realizes you aren't coming back yet. I feel sort of glad that you were not exactly best friends, as it will make the grief less for him. 

Me on the other hand... 

I miss you so much. I don't know what I believe about the afterlife, but I find myself so badly wanting to believe I will meet you again someday. Or that you are still with me. 

Most of all, I want you to know how much you were loved. I loved you so much. I wish I had been better for you. Appreciated the time we had more. I love you so so much sweet man. Letting you go was the kindest thing I could do, but nothing could have been harder. 

I miss you every minute. 

norm.jpg 

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Bailey15

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Reply with quote  #2 
Hi normsmom,
I love the picture you posted of your handsome boy. He has such a sweet face and bright beautiful eyes. I can just imagine him looking at you with a quizzical look! What you described brings back how I felt when I had to say good bye to Bailey; totally broken. We had that same bond - he understood me like no one else and talked to me with his eyes. I am so sorry you have to go through this pain. 😔
If it helps, I do believe that we will see them again. That's the only thing that really got me through. I believe your boy know how much you love him and will be looking out after you. Please be kind to yourself - we tend to look at everything we might have gotten wrong when we are grieving. In time, your happy memories will come more to the forefront. So sorry for your loss! Sending hugs,
MJ
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normsmom

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Reply with quote  #3 
Hello MJ,

Thank you so much for the kind reply. I went back and read through your story. I empathized so much with your first post about Bailey, was uplifted by the "remembering the happy times" post, and so warmed when I saw that you had become ready to rescue a new dog. It gives me hope that this unrelenting heartache will pass.

I have another dog who is doing okay - we've been going for a lot of walks in Norm's favourite places together to keep busy. I am glad to have his company and I love him to death, but it's funny how empty the house still feels without my Norman. My little guy isn't a barker, so this was the first garbage day without anyone barking at the garbage trucks stopping outside. I never thought I would miss the barking! :) Thank you so much again for your kind response. It helped very much. 
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William

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Reply with quote  #4 
What a beautiful boy! I'm so sorry for your loss. I totally relate to the role your baby played in your life.
I'm going on six months without William who was the absolute love of my life. My sidekick my best friend my reason for getting up everyday.
It's so hard and I totally understand the emptiness and loss you are experiencing.
All I hang on to are the memories that's all we have. Rely on those to help take some weight off this grieving journey we are on.

All we can do is continue to move forward as best we can. I have no other pets but I would imagine your bond with your surviving pet can only become stronger.
🐾❤️
Kim

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Kim

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Bailey15

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Reply with quote  #5 
Hi Heather,
I hope you are doing okay. I know it's so painful waking up and not having your sweet, beautiful Norm there. I understand what you mean about 'missing him barking at the garbage trucks'. I remember after Bailey died, driving into the garage and just standing there imagining I could still hear him barking for me to come home. It's so sad missing all of these little things that we have come to love - even their barking!

I was so touched when I read your response. Knowing that Bailey's story has helped you means more than I can say. It's just over 2 years since he passed - such an emotional time with darker memories so your reply was like a ray of light! 💖 It does get easier in time but unfortunately the mourning, which is an important part of healing, is just so painful!

I have an idea that you might find helpful Heather. I've been keeping a journal since Bailey died, entitled "I Remember You". I wrote all of his nicknames and other things I didn't want to forget. When I write to him I date each entry so now when I look through it's like a journal of healing. I will definitely make a point to tell him what you said about his story next time!

The other thing I thought is that Tucker may surprise you by wanting to be there for you more than usual. After my friend lost her dog, her cat practically attached himself to her - even sleeping by her head. This cat was a rescue and had never showed much interest in her before. Of course Tucker will never replace the beautiful bond you will always share with your beloved Norm but I'll bet he would love to comfort you. Animals are so intuitive that way; aren't they? Please take Care! I will be thinking of you and will check back to see how you are doing.

Hugs, MJ ❤️
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MyBella

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Reply with quote  #6 
norm.jpg

Dear Heather,

I am so sorry for the loss of your handsome Norm, I love this photo of your boy, he is so handsome and beautiful all at once, and the love and depth in his eyes...it is like you are looking right into his beautiful soul, amazing photo, thank you for sharing this wonderful photo with us.

Continue to sing to your Norm, while you can't see his physical presence, never doubt that he isn't with you, your sweet boy is always close, the bond you and Norm have will never be broken....your Norm will make sure of that. 
I had my doubts after my little girl had to leave, she changed a lot of my beliefs while she was here with the way she lived and never gave up, and now her loving spirit has only enforced those beliefs...and believe me, I don't sway easily, she let me know she is still here with the many, many signs she has sent my way, I know can only come from her. So talk to your sweet Norm, tell him how much you love him still, that the love you have for him has even grown, isn't it amazing how our love for them grows even stronger, and always be sure to invite Norm along for those walks, he is always, always listening for your voice. No way is your sweet boy going to miss a walk with his wonderful Mom.
I am so sorry for your loss, may the pure love and light of your beautiful Norm always be felt so deeply in your heart.
Sending our most positive thoughts along with our biggest wishes for such peace and healing to find your heart.

Sincerely, Don & Vera

Image result for pooh in my heart quotes


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gizmomybaby

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Reply with quote  #7 
Hi norms mom so sorry for your loss of your precious boy . It's a very hard pain to deal with , I can relate to you I lost my boy gizmo over 3 month ago he was the barker of the house the boss I also have another fur baby candy who's so different very quite so my house is so empty feeling . I am finding it very difficult like my hart has been ripped out , I feel your pain it's so hard . Plz know your not alone on here . Thinking of you at this really hard time and sending hugs Annemarie x this is my precious boy

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normsmom

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Reply with quote  #8 
Kim,

Thank you for taking the time to write to me. I really know what you mean when you call William "the absolute love of your life". I went and read through your posts and your focus on the good times is something I am trying hard to do, and have faith (thanks to the people here) that this will come in time. My remaining little boy is wonderful and honestly is what is helping me get up each day, go outside and walk etc. Thank you again for your supportive words. William's photos are very sweet. 

Quote:
Originally Posted by William
What a beautiful boy! I'm so sorry for your loss. I totally relate to the role your baby played in your life. I'm going on six months without William who was the absolute love of my life. My sidekick my best friend my reason for getting up everyday. It's so hard and I totally understand the emptiness and loss you are experiencing. All I hang on to are the memories that's all we have. Rely on those to help take some weight off this grieving journey we are on. All we can do is continue to move forward as best we can. I have no other pets but I would imagine your bond with your surviving pet can only become stronger. 🐾❤️ Kim
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normsmom

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Reply with quote  #9 
MJ,

Thank you so much for checking in on me. These days are so bleak and sad and knowing there are people here that understand is more help than I can express right now. I love the idea of the journal. I have been feeling the urge to remember him and have been collecting photos, and writing to him would be really helpful. There's so much I want to say. 

As for Tucker, he has always been a comforter, and he is certainly stepping up in his role. Norm was my first dog, my "soul dog" really, but Tucker is a wonderful, loving little boy and I am so glad to have his sweet eyes to look into and soft fur to pet during these tough times. He also has started playing fetch, which was Norm's game, so it's like he's taken on the responsibility of making me throw a ball for 2 hours a day. :) 

Thank you again for checking in on me. It means so much. I am glad that my comments about Bailey's story came at a good time. I am so glad I've found this place.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bailey15
Hi Heather, I hope you are doing okay. I know it's so painful waking up and not having your sweet, beautiful Norm there. I understand what you mean about 'missing him barking at the garbage trucks'. I remember after Bailey died, driving into the garage and just standing there imagining I could still hear him barking for me to come home. It's so sad missing all of these little things that we have come to love - even their barking! I was so touched when I read your response. Knowing that Bailey's story has helped you means more than I can say. It's just over 2 years since he passed - such an emotional time with darker memories so your reply was like a ray of light! 💖 It does get easier in time but unfortunately the mourning, which is an important part of healing, is just so painful! I have an idea that you might find helpful Heather. I've been keeping a journal since Bailey died, entitled "I Remember You". I wrote all of his nicknames and other things I didn't want to forget. When I write to him I date each entry so now when I look through it's like a journal of healing. I will definitely make a point to tell him what you said about his story next time! The other thing I thought is that Tucker may surprise you by wanting to be there for you more than usual. After my friend lost her dog, her cat practically attached himself to her - even sleeping by her head. This cat was a rescue and had never showed much interest in her before. Of course Tucker will never replace the beautiful bond you will always share with your beloved Norm but I'll bet he would love to comfort you. Animals are so intuitive that way; aren't they? Please take Care! I will be thinking of you and will check back to see how you are doing. Hugs, MJ ❤️
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normsmom

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Reply with quote  #10 
Thank you Don and Vera,

It brought tears to my eyes to read your description of Norm's photo. "Love and depth all at once" is him to a tee. I went back and read some of your early posts about Bella (what a beautiful soul and beautiful little girl) and my heart breaks for you and I feel exactly the same way you did right now. In many ways, it helps to know that I am not alone in this unrelenting gutwrenching sadness.

Your post also helped me to feel better about talking to him. I feel as though I have seen some signs from him, but like you, I am not easily persuaded, although I want so badly to believe. I will keep looking for those signs and trying to feel his presence on our walks. Your message meant so much. Thank you for taking the time to reply to me. 

norm.jpg

Dear Heather,

I am so sorry for the loss of your handsome Norm, I love this photo of your boy, he is so handsome and beautiful all at once, and the love and depth in his eyes...it is like you are looking right into his beautiful soul, amazing photo, thank you for sharing this wonderful photo with us.

Continue to sing to your Norm, while you can't see his physical presence, never doubt that he isn't with you, your sweet boy is always close, the bond you and Norm have will never be broken....your Norm will make sure of that. 
I had my doubts after my little girl had to leave, she changed a lot of my beliefs while she was here with the way she lived and never gave up, and now her loving spirit has only enforced those beliefs...and believe me, I don't sway easily, she let me know she is still here with the many, many signs she has sent my way, I know can only come from her. So talk to your sweet Norm, tell him how much you love him still, that the love you have for him has even grown, isn't it amazing how our love for them grows even stronger, and always be sure to invite Norm along for those walks, he is always, always listening for your voice. No way is your sweet boy going to miss a walk with his wonderful Mom.
I am so sorry for your loss, may the pure love and light of your beautiful Norm always be felt so deeply in your heart.
Sending our most positive thoughts along with our biggest wishes for such peace and healing to find your heart.

Sincerely, Don & Vera

Image result for pooh in my heart quotes


[/QUOTE
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normsmom

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Reply with quote  #11 
Annemarie,

Thank you so much for your reply. Sounds like we are in similar situations with the barker boss gone and the quiet baby remaining. I really relate to the empty feeling you described in your post, and I am so sorry for the recent loss of Gizmo. What a sweet face, and he looks like he was a wise soul who was full of unconditional love for you. What a sad loss. I am so sorry for you. 

Thank you for telling me I am not alone. Reading your story, and the stories of others, is one of the only things getting me through right now. It still hurts like crazy, but it's not quite as lonely. 

Quote:
Originally Posted by gizmomybaby
Hi norms mom so sorry for your loss of your precious boy . It's a very hard pain to deal with , I can relate to you I lost my boy gizmo over 3 month ago he was the barker of the house the boss I also have another fur baby candy who's so different very quite so my house is so empty feeling . I am finding it very difficult like my hart has been ripped out , I feel your pain it's so hard . Plz know your not alone on here . Thinking of you at this really hard time and sending hugs Annemarie x this is my precious boy
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gizmomybaby

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Reply with quote  #12 
Other people's journeys helped me to , to feel am not alone x my wee guy was my life a just use to laugh at him cause he'd bark his head of to get his own way , it's good when you get the wee funny memories but I couldn't remember any when the grief took over am starting to get wee bits but the sadness takes over , it's hard to lose the most precious thing in life x sending hugs norms mum , I was showing my niece norms pic there she says what a beutiful boy xxx Annemarie
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Chinadoll

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Reply with quote  #13 
Norm's mom, what an absolutely beautiful picture of Norm. He looks so sweet, so loving, and his eyes are deep and soulful. But what pleased me the most is the HAPPY look on his face, full of love, thank you for sharing this wonderful picture with us here. MJ's suggestion about a journal is a good idea. I started my journal one week after China passed, and then added Nicky when he passed 3 months later. I did it daily for awhile and then started doing it weekly. I write to them, tell them how I'm feeling and if anything happened that I wanted to tell them. I openly express my feelings to them, I don't hold anything back. I think it has been helpful to me, a way to put into words, what I can't say out loud. I also took the time to write down the routines we had, the funny things we did, the small little things I loved about them. I knew as time went by I would probably forget some of the things I did with them, trips, walks, toys, all the little memories. Whenever I'm going through my day, if I think of something or have a reminder of something, I will make an entry that day. I'm also glad I did this. I picked Sunday morning as my memorial day, I light a tea candle and let it burn for them until it goes out. I pray, have a conversation with them, just be there in that moment, sharing my feelings and thanking them. I also talk to them daily, just little words I use to say, it helps me. It was hard in the beginning, choked up as I tried to speak to them, but it is easier now. I have a strong faith, I do believe we will be united again, I can't even imagine what that will be like. I've had 3 dreams, two were exceptional and truly spiritual in nature. Some days I feel their closeness, others I don't, but I believe they can from time to time, look in on us. Their death has transformed my life, I'm not the same person, I'm better, more grateful, more forgiving and I know what the terms 'bonding' and 'heart dog' means. I never felt grief like this in my life before, it is different, difficult to put into words. They both left me a gift, which will be eternal. I'm healing, slowly, it is a long journey but all the pain and sadness is worth every minute I had with them both. Take care, Blessings for peace and comfort.
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normsmom

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Reply with quote  #14 
Aw, thank you to you and your niece. There are a lot of funny memories. I will look forward to those helping to break up the sadness a little bit. 

Quote:
Originally Posted by gizmomybaby
Other people's journeys helped me to , to feel am not alone x my wee guy was my life a just use to laugh at him cause he'd bark his head of to get his own way , it's good when you get the wee funny memories but I couldn't remember any when the grief took over am starting to get wee bits but the sadness takes over , it's hard to lose the most precious thing in life x sending hugs norms mum , I was showing my niece norms pic there she says what a beutiful boy xxx Annemarie
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normsmom

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Reply with quote  #15 
Thank you so much for your reply. He was a very happy and loving boy. He didn't let his bad hips get him down. He found joy in so many things - throwing himself into the snow, playing with a tennis ball (or 3), getting his treats, lying beside me and putting his little arm around me in a hug as I pet him, sitting outside in the backyard and barking at the squirrels... he sure knew how to enjoy the moment. 

I am really glad to hear the journal has helped you. I am working up the strength to start mine too. It's funny you should mention the candle. I have started lighting one each morning as a way to say hello to him. Mornings were our special time for pets and kisses. 

Everyone here has made me feel okay about still talking to him. He made me a better person when he was here, and I'm comforted to think he will do the same now that he is gone. 

Thank you so much for your reply.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Chinadoll
Norm's mom, what an absolutely beautiful picture of Norm. He looks so sweet, so loving, and his eyes are deep and soulful. But what pleased me the most is the HAPPY look on his face, full of love, thank you for sharing this wonderful picture with us here. MJ's suggestion about a journal is a good idea. I started my journal one week after China passed, and then added Nicky when he passed 3 months later. I did it daily for awhile and then started doing it weekly. I write to them, tell them how I'm feeling and if anything happened that I wanted to tell them. I openly express my feelings to them, I don't hold anything back. I think it has been helpful to me, a way to put into words, what I can't say out loud. I also took the time to write down the routines we had, the funny things we did, the small little things I loved about them. I knew as time went by I would probably forget some of the things I did with them, trips, walks, toys, all the little memories. Whenever I'm going through my day, if I think of something or have a reminder of something, I will make an entry that day. I'm also glad I did this. I picked Sunday morning as my memorial day, I light a tea candle and let it burn for them until it goes out. I pray, have a conversation with them, just be there in that moment, sharing my feelings and thanking them. I also talk to them daily, just little words I use to say, it helps me. It was hard in the beginning, choked up as I tried to speak to them, but it is easier now. I have a strong faith, I do believe we will be united again, I can't even imagine what that will be like. I've had 3 dreams, two were exceptional and truly spiritual in nature. Some days I feel their closeness, others I don't, but I believe they can from time to time, look in on us. Their death has transformed my life, I'm not the same person, I'm better, more grateful, more forgiving and I know what the terms 'bonding' and 'heart dog' means. I never felt grief like this in my life before, it is different, difficult to put into words. They both left me a gift, which will be eternal. I'm healing, slowly, it is a long journey but all the pain and sadness is worth every minute I had with them both. Take care, Blessings for peace and comfort.
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