RIZZAR Tonti Dec 2004-May 8 2016

Once on a very lonely dark day in a small cottage out in a kiwifruit orchard in New Zealand a black hairy angel with 4 legs walked into my life. He was intended to go to a family with two kids but his owner stopped by with him anyway so that I could at least see him first. He immediately wrapped himself around my legs and she could not take him away. After she grew tired of this she said

WELL I guess he is yours guess ill have to break the bad news to them. I asked her of his name she said RIZZAR. She got in her car and left. It was the happeist day in my life.

From that point on Rizzar and I became as one we were inseperable as if spot welded together. it was as if we felt what each other felt and knew what each other knew.

It was then that I believed that God sent us angels to watch over us , comfort us and give us family where there was none.

We have been through many adventures together some of them very challenging. We ate together, slept together, ran together and spoke without words.

Then two years ago Rizzar developed canine cancer which we fought to over come. Mast cell tumor and Cushings disease which a very special person treated with high powered super foods and natural medicine.

Rizzar fought bravely against the odds for two year but this morning my beloved soul mate and best friend passed over Rainbow bridge. His tumors overhwelmed him and he was in grave pain and lost control over his body movemwnt.

Hiis head rested on my shoulder as the Dr gave him the lethal injection. My eyes were the last thing he saw.

The feeling lacks description as if one's soul has been ripped out of one's body. The pain is immeasurable and disabling but I know in the deepest part of me that there really is a promise that one day we will all be reunited again after these erthly coild are through never to be parted again.

Rizzar my beloved son. Run FREE now through the clouds and the stars and with every creature ever loved by every human to whom God hath sent. your paw in hand I;ll never let go!!


3 weeks later and I am ever more devastated without him. I pray to the good God above to pour my life out so I can join him again for all time. I am without breath This is sheer hell waiting for heaven to take hold

Richard Tonti
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Rizzarsdad   What a beautiful story of your beloved Rizzar.  All of us here know the pain and grief you are feeling.  All pets big, or small are members of our family.   Cancer is a horrid, horrid disease not beaten by many humans or animals.  It sounds like you and Rizzar had a wonderful, exciting life together for those 12 years.  I am so very sorry about your loss. 

You did the right thing by your baby.  None of us ever wants to see our babies suffer even 1 hour.  I had to put my baby Winston to sleep 3/2/16.  I griev 24/7 for him.  I find a little comfort in the thought that I ended his misery and suffering before it got out of hand.  Timeis the only true healer of grief.  I wish you peace and healing.  Sue
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Hi Rizzarsdad,
Those us who are know that kind of special bond with an animal are very lucky because it brings a world of joy for hopefully many years. I had my dog Bailey for 15 years - my husband and I say they were the best years of our life. However, with great love comes great devastation when the time comes for them to leave. I understand what you are going through. I remember having the same thoughts when Bailey left us in November. The pain was so overwhelming I seemed to go in and out of numbness but in the moments when it became real I literally couldn't stand the pain.
I am so sorry for what you are going through. There are no words to describe that awful loss. I never thought I would get through it but I will say things have gotten better (not that I don't still miss Bailey so very much) but as Kasey (here on the Forum said, time has helped to soften the edges.)
You may like to write to Rizzar in a journal. I wrote to Bailey and I found it painful but apparently the writing does something to help your brain and I did feel better afterward. We are still working on a Memory scrapbook for Bailey and I find that helps me stay close to him.
I also tried acupuncture with hypnosis - just a few suggestions. As you go along you will find what works best for you. I agree with you that we will see our beloved friends again.
One last thing, I remember someone telling me that Bailey's spirit was staying close by because he hated seeing his mom so sad. I had always wanted to only give Bailey peace and happiness (he had been severely abused as a young puppy before I got him) so at that point I knew I had to try and find ways to feel better - at least at times - so I started going out to dinner with my husband, going out with friends more, going for massages, etc. and over time I started to get used to the new normal,
I hope this helps maybe even a little - and if nothing else please know that there are others (esp. on this Forum) who understand what you are going through and are here to support you.
Again so sorry for your loss of your beautiful Rizzar!
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hi Rizzarsdad; such beautiful wordings for your Rizzar, I too lost 2 dogs last year Munki on 12/3 and Daizy on 1/2...both due to Cancer.........and they both had the Mast Cell tumors in their lives Munki's was completely removed with clean margins, Daizy had dirty margins due to the placement of the mct near her hind bend of leg.

Yes, Cancer sucks and I am glad you had your Rizzar for 2 years after the cancer.......please know you are not alone..........Both Daizy and Munki, the cancer both spread on both of them(after many years of being diagnosed with it and home remedies)..., and within one month for Daizy and within 6 days for Munki the cancer did get the best of them. And yes, my world is shattered, words cannot even say how I feel.

Please know that your Rizzar is free from pain....I have so many pictures, fur clippings, a paw print and the ashes of my Daizy and Munki which brings a small smile to my face, but saddened cuz I cannot physically hold them or see them, and now await, til we meet again.

My heart goes out to you during this oh so difficult time.


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I am so so sorry for your loss - what an absolutely beauty!
There are no words, I know . . . pain, the loss, the loneliness and emptiness - Losing someone so loved affects you - it becomes buried deep inside you and just becomes a 'hole of pain and ache' . . .Take your time and be kind to yourself.

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