bullymomma
I have a 2 year old english bulldog named Darla who has kidney failure. We found out in January 2014. They said she has 2 months to live. Well it's March 2015 and shes still here. She goes a few times a week for treatment and has her special diet. She is just as sweet as they come. She is in great spirits and to be honest no one believe me shes sick. Well last Saturday I was told that the vet would be shocked if she lived another 6 months. That was just devastating to hear that. She's my baby. I want to protect her and love her. She doesn't deserve that. So as I amp her treatments up I am hoping for the best. Again she is still as spunky as ever and doesn't act sick. Well on Tuesday I took my french bulldog named Herschel to the vet. He is 3! All of his lymph nodes were swollen. It came back that my dear sweet boy has lymphoma. At that moment my world just crashed down. My sweet angel boy is sick. And I cant stop it. I was offered chemo but the price was more than I could handle. I feel so guilty not being able to offer that to my sweet baby. He's always been there for me and I could not do the same. Now he is on prednisone to help and I am placing him on a special diet for cancer. I am checking into acupuncture and looking at other options to help him. Though there is no cure I would like to keep him at peace and no pain while he is still with me. I can not believe that not just one but both of my babies are terminally ill. I am grateful I still have them but I know that it may not be long before I do not have either. I am so upset and so heart broken.

These little babies are all I have. They are my whole world and everything I do it is for them. My best friends, my family and the reason I keep going. I can not imagine my life without them. I also can not imagine having to move on without them. They are the light that keeps beaming. I cry constantly and I can not eat. I can not believe this is happening. So young and so full of life. Why must this happen to me. 

I would much rather it be me then them with these awful diseases. I wish I could help them more. I feel like such a bad mommy. I want to protect them. I also feel guilty for not being able to supply chemo. I wish I had the money. I have done everything from creating a campaign to raise money to selling items to help them. I just hope when the time comes for them to go I am able to accept it. 

This is heartbreaking. resize.jpg 
I love my dear sweet babies! <3
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AliceM
bullymomma, I am so sorry.  Your babies are beautiful. I truly cannot imagine dealing with two babies who are so critically ill.  That has to be so devastating.  Don't ever think that you are a bad mommy.  We all do the best we can for our babies and I know that our babies know that they are loved and cherished. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
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bullymomma
Thank you for those kind words. I am at a loss. My sweet babies mean everything to me. I am so use to taking care of them and constantly being with them. I always plan everything I do around them. They are my children and the only family I have besides my dad (their grand dad). This is one of the worst pains to ever go through.
I love my dear sweet babies! <3
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ahartofilis
Hello Bullymomma, Your babies are very sweet!! I read your post on my thread first and was very saddened that these terrible diseases are taking over your sweet ones at such young ages. I really feel for you! I understand how much you love them. I honestly have little experience with the illnesses that each of them has.
My girl Coco, had bone cancer which was also quite devastating for me. I was also offered chemo and opted not to put her through it. I did have 10 wonderful years with her yet the cancer took a few good years away from her, and me!
 It sounds like you are doing all that you can for your babies. I did a lot of research on my girls disease and got more then one vets opinion. That can make a big difference. Being as proactive as possible will help a lot. You said that you want to keep them in peace and pain free for as long as possible. Whatever you can do towards that will be good for them, and you! I also looked into some holistic ways to treat my girl. By the time she was diagnosed her cancer had spread which didn't give her much time. Yet many have found great results with holistic treatments.
   I really hope that you have more time with them! I feel your heartbreak!!.......................Sincerely, Andrea 
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bullymomma
Thank you so much Andrea! I am starting acupuncture tomorrow for my french bully. I am hoping that will relieve some pain and give him some time. He is also going on a new diet that i researched. My other baby who has kidney failure goes to her treatments and luckily she isnt slowing down. She has been going strong. My fear is once my little boy passes it will drag her down with grief. I've been worried sick.
I love my dear sweet babies! <3
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shantismom
So sorry to hear of your babies both so sick.  I lost my cat Shanti in October and if I had to face another loss it would be extremely difficult so my heart goes out to you.
 You want to keep your babies feeling the best they can and without pain and that makes you a good Mommy.  I do not feel that it is always a good idea to put our babies through treatments that will make them feel worse.  My vet had talked with me about a treatment at one time for Shanti and his bowel disease, it made him so sick, actually I thought he wasn't going to survive.  Keeping them comfortable and loved is the best thing you can do.
I will keep you in my prayers.
Marlene Wagner
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bullymomma
Thank you so much shatismom! I will always do what I can for my babies and keeping them happy and comfortable is what I plan. I am hoping that I can have them a bit longer. But if they are ready to go and can't fight any longer I would understand. Granted I would be devastated and heart broken but I also want them to be pain free. 
I love my dear sweet babies! <3
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spiritdog
I know how difficult it is to have 2 sick pets. I know how hard you are trying to do everything possible for them. I am sure you have dedicated yourself to them and been a 24 hour caregiver. Be strong for them.

I also had 2 sick dogs, very sick. Then my cat of 17 yrs. got ill. My life was filled with multiple pharmacies, multiple vet visits, multiple long drives, and countless hours researching each of their illnesses. They were my life, my comfort, my world.

My cat passed in Nov. 2 months later my poodle died, 6 months later both my parents died, and 10 months later my last and most loved Sidekick died. Devastated, exhausted, and a crushed heart.

Soak in every moment of them. Take video and pictures of them. Give them a bit more time on their walks if they want. Take a longer route home in the car if they love car rides. You will cherish these things .......because I know.
"People disappoint, dogs never do" - spiritdog

"You MUST be your pets ADVOCATE, if it doesn't feel right walk away." - spiritdog
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bullymomma
Im so sorry to hear about that spiritdog! My thoughts are with you! I am spending every moment I can with them. I plan to do as much as I can within my power. 
I love my dear sweet babies! <3
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spiritdog
Yes it has been a rough couple of years. It was a rough couple of years trying to do the best for my "kids"...all I was saying is cherish every moment, record what you can, soak in to your memory every moment you can...........and continue to be an advocate for them......you know them better than any vet....remember that.

I hope they live for a long time with you.............hugs, spiritdog
"People disappoint, dogs never do" - spiritdog

"You MUST be your pets ADVOCATE, if it doesn't feel right walk away." - spiritdog
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Precious16
I am so sorry to hear about this. It is never easy to lose a pet especially at such a young age it feels so unfair. My prayers are with you. Cherish every moment you have with them and dont be hard on yourself, you have done more for them than many people do for animals. 
"What we have once enjoyed, we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us" <3 Miss you precious
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