jasminbailey
My baby left my side 8 weeks ago on May 25, 2020! I am in my 40’s have no child! Bailey was my child my only love. He started coughing two years ago. I took him to the vet and it was heart failure! With medications his cough was better, but not totally gone! One year later again his cough got worse! I took him to the vet, they gave him some steroid and he was fine! In December 2019, he started seizure episodes, but they were very short, like maybe seconds! He would ran to me, when that happen, and I would picked him up into my arms and kiss him and say to not worry! I didn’t took him to the vet for the seizures, because I have health anxiety and it’s so bad that I had to leave my job!( I have bachelors in nursing)! Bailey was 17 years old, he had his teeth, his overall health wasn’t bad, beside his heart, his little heart! Last year he lost all his hearings, he would ran and bark for no reason! He was confused sometimes!  Until this May!  In May 23, at 4:30 am, I heard some knocking noise! I wake up like crazy, I knew it was Bailey! He had seizure, but this time was scary! He was shaking so bad! I took him in my arms, I hold him, it took maybe 2-3 minutes! Seizure was gone! But Bailey! He didn't cough! His chest was sounding babbling! I knew, during seizure, fluid got into his lungs! In the morning Bailey was very confused, he couldn’t find his water to drink, he would circle around himself! I called vet, but his vet was not there, so I made an appointment in 2 days! I search on google and I find out that after seizure pets have confusion! That night Bailey couldn’t sleep, he just sat! Finally, at 4:30 he slept! I slept too! At 6:30 when I opened my eyes, Bailey was sitting under my bed and watching me! I hugged him, took him outside, he was confused! I called vet and told them I will not wait, I am coming! They kept Bailey under oxygen tent for 2 hours! After 2 hours I called vet( because of covid I wasn’t able to stay there), they told me he is in critical condition! I closed my eyes, put my hand on my heart, and asked Bailey! My son, my love, my baby, please don’t go! You need to come to your mama and die in my arms! After 10 minutes vet called me to pick Bailey! He told me he will have heart attack anytime from now to 6 months!  It’s only 10 minutes from vet to my home! I talked to bailey in the car! I told him we will be at home soon! We were home, I picked him and as soon as we entered home, he peed on me! I knew that was it! His head felt on my shoulder, and his heart was on my heart, where he was belong to! He had some twitching! Small ones!  I kept him into my arms and then I put him on his favorite bed! And he gave the last and big breath and was gone! I never thought Bailey will be gone that soon! I decided to bury my baby, so he will be back on the earth again!( it’s just my belief) !  when 2 years ago vet told me about his condition, I knew it would be very hard for me, I cried a lot! but I never thought it would be like this! I cry everyday, I remember him every minute! I miss my Bailey so much! My heart is broken into 1000 pieces! I have internal tremor all night and days! I can’t do it without him! Pray for me! One day, if I feel very happy, I know that it will not be full happiness! There will be always something missing! Something special, my baby Bailey! 

My heart, my Bailey, mama loves you forever! Thank you for the chance that you gave me to feel like a mommy! I will not be able to call someone my son any more! I will not be someone’s mommy, but glad I was yours! Rest In Peace and stay in my heart where you are belong to! 

Please pray for my broken heart! 
Jasmin 0F21A947-EB4C-4678-8752-58D13BCAD179.jpeg
Jasminbailey
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Pootiepaws
I'm so sorry for your loss.  I too am in my middle 40's and my little kitty died on the 1st of the year in my home.  I had an appointment to have her put down on the 3rd,  but she went on her terms,  died at home. She was over 18 years old,  and diagnosed as diabetic at age 12. I have a little memorial for her at the top of the stairs where she used to greet me when I got home from work.  I have her ashes and a little memorial plaque and it's the first thing I see when I get home.  It does get better with time,  but it's different for everyone.  Sometimes she creeps up in my memories,  but I've come to terms that she's in a better place.  It was hard being at work knowing she wasn't feeling well.  
Many condolences to you
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Queenjustine
Jasmine. My heart hurts reading what you wrote. I could write a very similar story. I lost my baby, Princesse, on June 9th. I am a nurse as well. I cannot figure out how to live without her. She was my baby. I have no human kids either. She was my baby for 13 years. I don’t know how to deal with this grief. I lost my boyfriend as well the other day. I’m so sad and lost. I don’t know how to move on. Please know you are not alone. 
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Queenjustine
Jasmin...sorry for the phone changing the spelling. 
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Monroegirl
So sorry for your loss of Bailey. What a cute little guy he was. (((Hugs)))
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Queenjustine

Thank you. 

so cute!

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P_Mom
Dear Jasmin, I'm sobbing reading your message about your sweet baby boy.  I'm so sorry and I so understand your pain. I'm 45 with no biological children. Patch was my first dog, first love, and I too consider him my son. He was 16 weeks when I got him and lost him 5 months 1 week and 2 days ago. He just turned 15.  He too had a heart condition and was a little guy like your beautiful Bailey.  It's so painful.  He was so tough and brave (yet the gentlest soul) I truly thought (hoped and prayed) he'd have at least 1-2 more years.  You took incredible care of Bailey!  17 is still too soon (they need our life spans) but is a testament to the wonderful home and life you gave him.  It's not easy with a heart condition.  (The meds help but hurt too.)  Hugs and caring thoughts are with you now and in the days ahead. ❤  
Jennifer
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GEMINIXX69
I am so sorry.  I know the pain is unbearable.   I am praying for you.
Linda L.
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Queenjustine
I don’t know what to do anymore. The pain is unbearable. I just want my baby back.
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BarbOscar13
I'll pray for you!, Bailey's spirit is still around and he doesn't want to see you sad and crying. I lost my oscar last week and my heart hurts,  but I'm trying to be strong b/c Oscar is watching from heaven, I'm sorry you lost your baby boy, again I'll pray for you 
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chilover
Jasminbailey 

Oh Jasmin I am so sorry to hear about your beloved Bailey. It drew tears to my eyes. Just like yourself and Jennifer I have no biological children & I lost my beloved little Chihuahua "Daisy" who I also considered my child. She was 15yrs & she died in my arms too. I feel your pain, we all do & we all support you on this forum. Daisy was on steroids too & although they helped her to eat she started to have the odd spasm. When our pets become ill we do our upmost best for them, with medicine, veterinary advice & we fight tooth & nail for them & it hurts so deep, & then nothing in this world can prepare for the depth of pain we have to endure when we loose them. Only us pet people can ever understand what it is all about & I think we are all very lucky to have experienced such a love on this level...To experience a bond with a pet is magical & a gift & You & your beautiful Bailey shared a love that was so special & I am so glad that you have experienced this love because you deserve it, you did a wonderful thing by giving him a wonderful home, a wonderful life & he loved you for it.

That is a lovely photo of your boy, what a sweetie..
I visit a church on a regular basis to pray for my baby. I go on the 2nd of every month (her anniversary) & also other days inbetween whenever I feel the need. It is one of my rituals. It helps me. On my next visit I will pray for you too Jasmin, & your beloved Bailey. Please keep posting here. It would be lovely to hear more about Bailey, if and when you feel you are able to do so.


Sending you comfort and peace

Daisy's mummy 
Angelina 
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jasminbailey
I just wanted to thank every and each of you for the warm words and prayers! I am sorry, I don’t know how to replay individually for each comment! May God bless you all, and gives your broken heart comfort! Losing fur babies is very painful and only warm words that comes from you beautiful people can ease it a little! As we found each other here, I hope that our fur babies in the rainbow bridge find each other! My baby was very defenseless, he probably will need your babies help as I need your help! Thank you again

Jasmin
Jasminbailey
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BarbOscar13
Thank you Jasmine !
I don't have any doubt "Your baby is with all our babies! " 
 Whenever you have a chance, try to join the chat
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