MaxsMom2
I miss you so much. There have been so many stressful events Since your passing. These two weeks I feel I haven’t been devoting enough time to cherish you. I talk about you , but there are almost entire days where I don’t, and I feel like a neglectful mother. I feel like I haven’t been honoring you. I did get candles and lit them in front of your plaque. I had a small painting done of you, I still need to pick up the frame,  it’s just been so chaotic lately. I really want to create a small memorial area for you. Filled with your favorite things Filled with your photos. I want to be able to walk over to you when I’m stressed and just sit with you like we used to. You have no idea how much I miss your bark. Everytime I hear a bark from outside for a split second I think it’s you, that you’ve come back to me and all of this is a nightmare. 
Laraine Esposito 
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ChantillyCat
I'm so sorry about your Max. I can feel that you loved him very much. Please try not to be so hard on yourself for not having everything in order. I feel the same way about my soul kitty I recently lost. I feel guilty that I still don't have all the things I want for her memorial. I'm sure Max knows how much you love him and you are cherishing him in so many ways already. The memorial will come together in time. What if for now, you can talk to him whenever and wherever? He is with you in spirit. Sending you pink light and healing <3
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MaxsMom2
Thankyou so much for your kind response. I really needed it. At times I feel like people get sick of me talking about him. I felt redundant on here. Like my words were hollow and repetitive so I stopped posting on here. I think with the other stressors in my life, I feel I don’t have the capacity to mourn him. It is so emotionally exhausting when I start crying and can’t stop. I love him so much, I just don’t have the ability for that level of emotion because I’m focusing it on my needs at the moment. But I also need to connect with my son, honor him, keep our hearts attached. I’m so sorry about your baby, I really do know the anguish and suffering your enduring. How long has it been since your fur baby passed? 
Laraine Esposito 
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ChantillyCat
You're very welcome, I'm glad we connected :) Please don't ever feel like you have to stop talking about your Max and your loss. I'm sorry you felt that way on this forum. This type of grief will take a long time to heal from and it helps immensely to talk about it. I know all too well how exhausting this grief can be. I'm really happy to hear you have been taking care of yourself. It's so important so please try not to feel guilty about that. Our babies want us to be healthy and happy. I lost my soul kitty 24 days ago and it hurts more than I can say. I miss her so much. My heart aches and I'm riddled with guilt, regret, and sorrow. Connecting with other people who understand my pain has been helpful. I'm here if you need to chat. <3
~ Jennifer
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