my_katernia99
Katernia was a German Short-haired Pointer. She was the most lovable dog I could ever ask for. She guarded my kids and I, followed me everywhere making sure I was protected. When my kids were sick she would sit with them the whole time. 
A couple of months ago my fiance and I split up, and I had to find another place to live. Being so busy with the move, and taking care of everything that needed done, I didn't see she had a huge mass on her belly, which was infected, until 5 days after our move. 
I had never dealt with cancer before with anyone, or any pet so close to me. Before taking her to the vet, I tried to give her a bath, but with the mass being so hard all I could do was cry and could not finish it. I rinsed her off and took her outside. 
She was put on a heavy dose of antibiotics hoping the infection would heal. It did help a little, but the week she passed it wasn't doing enough. I took her out to her favorite place to swim, and to walk in the woods a bit. Two days later she was so bad I had to put her down. That was one of the hardest things I ever did. 
I feel so guilty because maybe if I would have payed more attention to her during the move maybe I could have saved her, or made her last month or so a bit better. Even on her last day all she wanted was for me to hold her, and be with her. It breaks my heart so much. I worked that day, came home finding her laying in her bed. I sat beside her and she put her head on my lap. I knew it was time. I took her outside in a shaded area of my yard and held and pet her until her appt. My friends helped me give her a wonderful burial in a wooded part of her yard. 
I miss, and love you so much Kat, you will be in my heart forever! 
She turned 11 the weekend before she passed away!
Quote 0 0
tikibarb
Katernia is a beautiful girl.  I am so sorry for your loss.  Cancer is a horrific illness.  Katernia and I know that you did the best you could.  Sometimes life situations get in the way.  Of course you would have done everything you could to keep her healthy.  My daughter lost a beloved baby to cancer not too long ago.  One day he was great, the next he was extremely ill.  You can't predict these things.   Katernia had a great life with you and at least you were able to keep her with you through the move.  That is very difficult in itself.  In addition, your own emotional state over your breakup must have been draining on you.  Guilt is a horrible, nonproductive part of grieving.  I know as you talk with others on this forum, you will learn that you need to forgive yourself because you did the best you could, whether you doubt that or not right now, I know you did.  
Barbara Lyngarkos
My Beloved Ted 8/7/2005 - 7/7/10
http://rainbowsbridge.com/residents/TED001/Resident.htm
Quote 0 0
TriciaK
I'm so sorry and she was a beautiful girl, we always tend to think we could have done more for our pets when illness hits, but really it sounds like you did all you could.
The kindest gift to her was a peaceful and happy passing, try not to feel guilty as this is a horrible disease and I have no doubt you saved katerina a lot of pain and suffering by your unselfish act.

Tricia x

Quote 0 0
judylinn

I'm so sorry about your prescious baby. I know what you are going through, having lost mine recently. Don't blame yourself...animals often dont show us their pain and sickness, until its quite developed already. Remember that you gave her some joy taking her to swim and walk a bit. she would have been very happy. the pain is agonizing, no way around it...it just speaks of the deep connection and love you had for each other. I am so sorry. i will keep you in my prayers.  Judy

Quote 0 0