Sweetpea84
Hi everyone. My 13 year old cat Jasmine started acting different 3 weeks ago. She was more lethargic and tired. I took her in to the vet and she had fluid in her abdomen. They sent the fluid to a lab and said it was fip. She got progressively worse since then and yesterday i had to make the hardest decision to let her go. Just a few weeks ago she was fine and it all came on so quick. Im devastated over this and feel guilt. The vet said coronavirus is almost in most cats and for some it turns into fip. I just cant wrap my head around this. I miss her so so much. I dont know how to deal with it all.
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ChronicallyAce
I'm so sorry to hear about Jasmine. There is never a good time to lose our babies, but it is especially hard when the end comes so suddenly and so quickly.

I lost my boy Dante about 3 weeks ago. He was 5 and had been through a lot of sickness, but he had been doing so much better that his sudden illness took us and his vet by surprise. He seemed to waste away over the course of a week before we finally decided it was best to let him go.

I try to take comfort in knowing I did what was best for him so he didn't have to suffer any longer. I hope in the coming days you will be able to see that you did the right thing, too. Even now I deal with feelings of guilt, and that is totally normal, but I promise it will get better. In the first week I was finding all kinds of reasons to blame myself and I was overcome with guilt, but as time passes I start to realize I just wanted to make sense of why he was gone, even if it meant blaming myself. Just try to forgive yourself a little more each day. I have no doubts Jasmine knew you loved her very much, and freeing her from her pain and suffering was a very loving and selfless act.

It's still a struggle not having Dante here. Some days I still can't believe he's gone. I feel so lonely and miss him every day, but the pain gets easier to bear little by little. Be kind to yourself and patient with yourself as you grieve.
Dante
3/19/2013 - 5/4/2018
You are gone, my special boy, but I will love you forever. R.I.P.
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Sweetpea84
Chronically Ace, im so very sorry over your loss of Dante. Did they give you a diagnosis as to what they thought it was he had? It was only 3 weeks from the time they diagnosed jasmine and then she got so badly i had no choice but to say goodbye. In a way i am still in shock. And with fip the vet cant give a definite diagnosis either so i still ponder whether if it really was fip. I took her to two different vets to get opinions and the second one thought she might have something else but after an ultrasound result came back as ok they went back to the fip diagnosis.
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Sweetpea84
I just dont know how to deal with this. I miss her so much and i feel like my hearts been ripped from my chest. I dont want to do anything, i just want her back. I know she was suffering but i still feel guilty.
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catiebee
Sweetpea, I'm so sorry for your loss of Jasmine. It's hard when they decline so suddenly like that. Everything you're saying here is very normal for grief. It is terribly, terribly hard at first and is extremely hard to bear. Especially in the early phases when it's all so raw. Take care of yourself as you walk through this tough, tough season. I hope writing here and knowing you're not alone in your pain and that other people understand, will help you some.  Hugs to you.
Catie
-Missing Marissa deeply
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ChronicallyAce
Thank you for the kind words. They aren't 100% sure what it was. He had suddenly refused to eat and was showing a lot of problems in his GI tract, and they ended up doing an ultrasound to try to get a better idea of the cause. When doing the ultrasound, they saw fluid in his lungs, which can be a symptom of the heart condition he had his whole life. Unfortunately, when they tried to treat it as a symptom of his heart condition, he didn't respond. His vet said that since it wasn't related to his heart condition, it was most likely cancer. There were a lot of invasive procedures they could have done to try to diagnose the issue, but I didn't really think it fair for me to put him through all of that just so I could know for sure. The vet didn't believe that it would be beneficial to him in any way, and would just cause him unnecessary suffering.

For a while I felt guilt that I didn't try harder to find out what was wrong with him, but deep down I know I did the right thing. Dante had to fight his way through a lot of sickness, and he fought HARD. This last time, though, he struck me as very tired and just wanting to rest. As much as I miss him, I know that he's finally free and at rest now.

The first week is so hard, and I really feel for you right now. Even now, I struggle to find joy in a lot of the things I used to take pleasure in, like playing music or working on my craft projects. In the first few days in particular, I remember walking around the apartment like I was in a daze. I would sit on the couch and cry because Dante wasn't there on my lap. Everything felt empty and sad and I just wanted him back. I still do feel that way sometimes, but I don't feel it as constantly as I did in the first days after his passing.

Just know that we've all felt what you're feeling, and it's okay to feel that way. Let yourself be sad, let yourself work through the guilt. One day it won't be as hard as it is now.
Dante
3/19/2013 - 5/4/2018
You are gone, my special boy, but I will love you forever. R.I.P.
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dlw112566
I'm so sorry for your loss, I understand how you feel. I lost my little man Luke to FIP a week ago. He was only a year and 4 months old. He was fine the week before I noticed he was sleeping a lot and then his stomach looked real swollen. My vet diagnosed FIP and within a week I had to let him go. I miss him so much.
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Sweetpea84
Thank you catiebee and chronically ace for your replies. Im so sorry chronically ace, you did all you could and didnt let him suffer. Dante loves you for that. The vet told me its rare for an older kitty to get fip. I dont think its that rare. Theres a group on facebook and ive seen 11, 12 year old cats that develop fip. I guess in a way im still in shock. The vet said coronavirus can lay dormant for years. I never expected this to happen. Im still taking it day by day.
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Sweetpea84
dlw im so sorry for your loss! I hate this, as i wasnt expecting it to ever happen. I suspected cancer, but never fip.
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ANNDAK
I am so so sorry to hear about your Jasmine.  I lost my beautiful ten year old ginger tom Wilbur to FIP - it is a hideous and cruel disease.  He died within a week of diagnosis and despite my mother giving me £500 for injections in an attempt to boost his immune system - I lost him. 
He had to spend his last weekend in a surgery 20 miles away as there was no vet available where he was and when I was driving him back after almost hitting a lorry I hit a layby kerb and shredded my tire - his crate fell into the passeger seat well and he was so ill and on a drip he didn't even notice. 
I was at the time helping an elderly friend (who was like a dad to me) He came out to rescue me after the accident.  He had trouble medicating his cat Kita who had heart failure and I went  twice a day to give her her pills and within ten days and after a 3am dash to the vet's 20 miles away she too died.
My friend never got over this loss as she was all he had and whereas he loved Christmas like a child his last one was spent in grief and misery. 
Then within five months this person who I had known for almost 40 years also died and within a year of that I lost my wonderful mother/best friend/soul mate Marie.  She was my world.
The only thing that kept me going and the only soul I had left in the world was our little calico girl Spooky who had been diagnosed with a heart condition three weeks before I lost Marie and the vet had wanted to put her to sleep then.
I fought for her life and I was glad as Marie's last few weeks would have been hell without her and I would not have had her to comfort me in the year following Marie's passing.
The vet was amazed at how well she had become - she didn't know I was buying Taurine supplement off the internet but sadly she did not die of the heart problem - just over a year ago they found a tumour on her lung and within twelve hours of the diagnosis she died in my arms and I was alone at 6am with her - the last of all I loved and held dear and all within just over two years.
I have still not recovered and doubt I will but I know what you are going through as starting with Wilbur a sinkhole opened up and took my world.  I have suffered with depression for most of my life and all of these relatively sudden losses have destroyed me.  
My heart goes out to you over your little Jasmine - look after yourself.
All that keeps me going is that I believe they are all still with me - watch out for the signs.
Love and hugs to you
Andrea    
A M Dakin
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