In a rush to work, my brother ran over our family dog.
I am so upset.  My parents said he died instantly but I still imagine the scenario in my head and feel so upset.  I can't imagine there was no pain.  They said he made a big yelp.

He was a 12 year old miniature poodle and a good dog.  I have many bonding memories with him.  I almost feel even worse for my brother.  "I killed my best friend" is what he said to my parents.  He doesn't have the best friends and thinks we (his siblings) "hate" him already, and now that he's killed our pet he's scared we'll hate him even more.  Which we do not - we just don't approve of his lifestyle and friends (drugs, alcohol, etc).  Now he's gotta live with killing our dog for the rest of his life.
Anyways I have made it clear to my brother that I don't blame him or hate him and that I'm ok... it's just so hard to let go of a lost pet.  In a way we don't have to eventually live with the decision to put him down but the loss hurts so much right now.
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That sounds like a very difficult and sticky situation. On one hand you and your family NEED to grieve the loss of your dog. But when dealing with people who have problems with drugs and alcohol, you do not want him to feel anymore guilt or negativity than he already puts on himself. Be gentle with your brother but take time for you, too. You may have to keep your feelings about this more private from him- for his protection. But this could also be a way to reach out to him and to let him know how much you do love him. I hope that it does improve your relationship, then your dog's death would not have been in vain.

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