emstitcher
Hi All,

I am new to this - thank God, because it sucks beyond belief. Ten years ago, I was blessed to bring a goofy boxer named Brinks into my life. He was my puppy soulmate. When he was about 7, we rescued Phoebe, a crazy little boxer girl, and my boxer family was complete. My husband and I have 2 boys, now 18 and 21, and they grew up with Brinks. We lost our boy a week ago today, and the grief I feel is horrible. I cannot stop crying. Two years ago, we were told he had cancer. After many tests, it was a polyp, and he lived another amazing 2 1/2 years with us. A few weeks ago, he started to leak urine. He NEVER would do this on purpose. I took him right and in was told it was age, and we put him on Proin. He had a reaction that rapidly led to his deterioration and was gone 4 days later! They believe he had a tumor on his bladder that was causing the leaking. He began vomiting, became lethargic, and within a day couldn't move. We tried everything. We knew it was time, but HOW do you give up on your best friend. We were all able to be there, and our vet came to our home. It could not have been more peaceful, but ALL I feel is pain, guilt, sadness. I cannot believe he's not here with me and never will be again. Our oldest went back to college, and our son leaves for the marines next week. Our boxer, Pheebs, just NOW seems to get that he isn't coming back. She relied heavily on him, and they became sooo bonded in the last year. She has been mopey all day and follows me everywhere - very clingy. I cannot figure out how to get through this. My hubby loved him dearly, but he is handling it much better than I am. I am distraught. Mornings and bedtime are the worst. I am 49 and this is the worst loss I've experienced. Guess one could say I am lucky? But dear God, I just want my boy back.  brinks sun.jpg
Laney
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Debbs
Hi, so sorry about Brinks, he will always be in your heart and never leave you because you loved him so much. I understand exactly how you feel as
I had to say goodbye to my dear Teddy (cat) on Wednesday. I have to put on a brave face and act normal in front of my family as they wouldn't understand all the feelings you too describe. This is why I'm so grateful to have joined this forum, people are so kind and supportive of each other.
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gizmomybaby
So so sorry for your loss of your beautiful boy brinks x its a horrible pain totally would destroying x my baby boy his had to get pts over 4 weeks ago x am distraught crying all the time and am in shock even though I knew he wasn't well with a nasel tumour x I still have one fur baby left candy x but I dont even see a life for me no future x he was my baby and its crushing x plz know am here sending you hugs x
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emstitcher
Thank you both for your thoughts and prayers, and sending mine back to you. Our other boxer, Phoebe, is suddenly so anxious and won't leave my side :(. She has just figured out he's not coming back. Sigh....
Laney
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shorelinerach
Hi Laney. I am so very sorry for your loss of Brinks.  I can understand how you are feeling as I am feeling the same way.  I lost my Oliver last week and am in a fog.  His brother Duke who was his caretaker follows me everywhere.  I am trying to be strong for the both of us.  At 48 this is the worst pain I have ever experienced.  Please know you are not alone.  This forum has helped me in many ways.  Everyone is going through the same thing and very supportive.  Just know Brinks is at peace and smiling down on you.  A big hug to you!
Rachel
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emstitcher
I am so sorry for your loss, as well. I feel so stuck and sad all the time. Our youngest leaves for the Marines next week, and this has really thrown me for a loop. Too much loss all at once. Suddenly we will be empty nesters and my boxer boy is gone. I adore my husband, and we have always looked forward to this time together, but Brinks was supposed to be here. Feeling incredibly stuck and unhealthily dwelling on every time I DIDN'T do something with him or take him along. I feel like I am losing my mind. :(
Laney
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roastbeef56
I am so sorry for your loss. I too am feeling an empty pain in my heart for I lost my baby Twinky only 5 days ago. I cannot concentrate at work, I've had a loss of appetite for days, and I just want to lay in bed all day crying and reminiscing of all the wonderful days I had with my dear Twinky. We will both heal though, and I'm sure of it. It seems impossible at the moment because I can't keep myself from missing her. I am happy that she's resting as I'm sure you are that Brinks is resting as well. They will no longer feel pain, and they are probably playing up in heaven together right now. Stay strong and thank Brinks for all the wonderful memories. I'm sure he thanks you every day as he watches over you. I pray for your family and Brinks to live on in happiness as I pray for mine and Twinky.
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