We lost our 12 year old miniature doxie, Pumpkin, this past weekend. We had suspected that she had congestive heart failure for 2 months. The night before her passing, she was up all night coughing with a rapid heart beat. My dad took her in the car to the vet (40 mins away). He was petting her all the way. About 15 mins away from the vet, he looked down and she was gone. He drove her home and buried her in the back yard where she loved to play. 

We are all so devastated. My step-mom and I haven't stopped crying for three days. When they told me what happened, I was in disbelief. I couldn't believe it. I wanted to go out and dig her up to make sure. She had been my best friend and only pet I have known for 12 years. I am shocked by how upset I am. Nothing has upset me this much - not even when my mom passed away. Sometimes I fear that Pumpkin's spirit is somewhere confused, and lost and missing us. All I want is to hold her and tell her I love her and that everything is OK.

It's so hard when you spend 12 years taking care of your pet, and when they pass, there is nothing you can do about it. I stumbled across this site and the idea of the Rainbow Bridge. I have found some comfort in it. I have never been a religious person to think if there is a heaven or not. This tragedy has devastated me and made me rethink my beliefs. I hope that Pumpkin in there in the meadow waiting for me so that we can be united again.
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I'm so sorry for you and your family.  I know how hard it is and how bad you're hurting.  It is a surreal feeling and so hard to let go of our precious furbabies.  I saw my girl Tootie go right in front of my eyes and with my heart breaking in half, it was still so hard to accept and to believe.

It is without a doubt, in my opinion, harder to lose a beloved pet companion than it is to lose a human loved one.  I know that my Tootie's spirit is still with me and that she loves me.  I see no reason why Pumpkin can't be with you in spirit.  I do firmly believe that there is Heaven for animals too.  They are God's creatures too.  There are some lovely scriptures about animals and what God thinks of them on the Grief Support Center of the Rainbow Bridge website.  I hope that by reading them it will help ease your mind in that respect.

I'm terribly sorry for the grief you and your family are enduring.  I know it's a hard burden to bear.  I'm so very sorry for you.



Tootie ~ Sep. 1, 2000 - Sep. 4, 2010
Shine on you beautiful diamond!
Blueboy ~ Feb. 14, 1989 - Dec. 31, 1993
Always in my heart!
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I am so sorry for your loss.  It is devastating to lose a precious pet.  I lost my beloved Ted on 7/7 so I understand your pain.  I am not a particularly religious person either but I do believe that I will see Ted again.  Check out the post "will you see your dog...  I re-posted so it would come to the top of the post list.  It was originally posted by David, a 17 year old who lost his precious baby recently.  You may fund some comfort there.
Barbara Lyngarkos
My Beloved Ted 8/7/2005 - 7/7/10
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I'm so sorry you lost your baby. I lost my baby too. Tomorrow will be one week, but I keep reliving it so it feels like he just left me. It's so, so raw. I have too lost loved ones and haven't been this devistated. My dad died almost three years ago, and yes I was sad, but I didn't cry or grieve nearly as much as I am now, so I understand.

I'm also not a religous person. I have to believe I will be with my Jack again, it's helping me get through this living nightmare. Faith is such a personal thing. We have no proof really, but I so have to believe.. Our babies are in a special place where there is nothing but happiness. I also have to believe their spirits visit us. We have such a strong bond, they need us too.

 Cry your heart out, get it out. Talk to your baby, I swear they have to hear us.. I talk to Jack and tell him how much I love and miss him, I also sing him a song I made up for him. Do whatever you have to do to get through it. This site is helpfu too, I'm glad you found it.

Blessings to you and your family.

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I'm so very sorry about the loss of your beloved Pumpkin.  She is soooo cute. I know the pain your heart is in. It has been a devistating time for me also, as for everyone here. The bond of unconditional love that happens between us and our furbabies, is on such a deep level. In some ways it seems we are closer, because there aren't the defences that there are with people, its just pure love.
Pumpkin is okay, and there is a chord of love that still connects you to her. You can still send her love. Hug her into your heart, that is where she will always be.

I have a book to suggest. its called "Saying Goodbye To Your Angel Animals" by Allen and Linda Anderson.  It is a phenominal book. It is not written from a religious perspective, but it helps with so many things.  These people also lost their beloved pet, and it helped me alot in my healing process. There also little ideas of things to think about and meditate on..though not meditate in the traditional sense. I highly recomend it.
Some things that helped me, though I didn't do them until I was ready...but I planted a tree in honor of Maddie and her love, and some flowers. I had my on private time with a little memorial service, and took her picture and a candle, and just told her all that was in my heart.
Now everytime I look outside and see that tree, it brings warm feelings to me.
The monday candlelight ceremony on this site also helped me, though I sobbed through it.
Just some ideas for you, in your own healing time.
The pain is so so hard. Just know that we will be here for you. prayers and hugs.  Judy
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I am so sorry that you have lost your life friend.  To help you not feel she is confused and lost, call her name then, hold her in your heart.  She's OK, she's crossed over to Rainbow Bridge.  She knows your love for her.  Really sweetie, she is OK.  Just keep her love in your heart, so you can find peace.  I speak what I know, what I have experienced.

Peace, love to you and your family.
Death leaves a heartache no one can heal;
Love leaves a memory no one can steal.

Tuffy, My Puppy Love
June 20, 2005-July 26, 2010

Becky Leigh, Queen of my Heart
December 2010-November 10, 2015
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how are you doing amy?

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Bless your heart, I can hear your heart-break in your writing.  I am so very sorry for your loss of your very best friend, precious Pumpkin.   What a cutie she was.  We all know the feelings all too well.  We even understand how this loss can be worse than people we have lost.  I didn't even say that for a long time because I felt so guilty about having that feeling.  I didn't know it was a common feeling until others kept saying it on this website. 
Your post was very interesting to me because I was reading something recently about why God even allows sadness, loss, & pain in the lives of people.  The writer explained that in times of sadness, loss, and pain....this is when people turn to God the most.  When times are great and happy and we have plenty of everything, we are usually too busy having fun and God is kind of left out!  I don't know if it is true but I thought it was interesting.  Then, when I read your post (and rebecca's also), it made me think, well, maybe there is some truth to it!   For whatever it is worth, I believe with all my heart, that they are in a place so wonderful that we can't even imagine it.  Pumpkin is in a very happy, comfortable place.  They don't experience time as we do so there so they are not missing us in the same way we are missing them.  Also, we will be reunited with them again when our time comes.  I'm not trying to push my beliefs off on you but just to share because I don't know how I'd cope if I didn't have my beliefs!
But, I know all that doesn't help take away what you are feeling now.  You and your step-mom just have to grieve and let it out and let healing do its work with you as time goes by.    

rebeccaann, I'm also so very sorry for your loss of Jack.  Both of you girls sound on the young side of life to me and  I notice that you have both lost a parent. I am so sorry you are having to experience loss again. My heart really goes out to both of you.   I pray for both of you to have some peace and comfort as you go through the grief. 
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