MaxsMom2
I’ve been avoiding writing on here lately. Avoiding leaving the house. Very poor sleeping. I know that bottling up my feelings about loosing my son makes things worse. I become anxious and irritable. Nothing makes me happy, nothing really brings any joy. Handling this new reality of life without him is deeply depressing. I do feel as the days go by, the more it sets in that he’s not coming back. I can’t picture a life without my son, my hearts been ripped out since the day he passed. It’s changed me, in profound ways. I can’t conceptualize that I’ll never give him another bath, I’ll never brush his teeth again, I’ll never clean out his ears. I’ll never give him his morning dental bone again. I’ll never make dinner without him sitting at my feet waiting for food to drop. I’ll never have him bark at the door when it’s closed. I’ll never get out of the shower and find him in a ball on the bath mat waiting for me. I’ll never see the excitement he gets in his eyes when I pick up his leash. I’ll never put him in the car again and go for a long drive or to the park. I just want my son back. I can’t stop saying that all I want is my son back. I have a deep wound in my soul, it will never heal, my soul will grow around it, but the pains a part of me now, I’ll always live with it. I don’t want to go on auto pilot and avoid my feelings. I just hope Max knows how much I love him and that he is always on my mind, I see and feel him every where. 
Laraine Esposito 
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Jen_0312
Laraine,  I understand how you feel. I lost my boy a week ago. He was almost 16. I keep thinking that he will greet me when I come home. I am very depressed about it. He was all that I had and sometimes I wonder why I should even get out of bed in the morning because what is there to get up for anymore? Talking to others going through the same thing does help. I hope that you will find some comfort from this site. I'm so sorry for your loss. 
Jen
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Lis84
Isn't the pain awful. We put our boy to sleep today and already i'm looking for him and things like having a shower without him standing there staring is hard!
I'm just feeling waves of sadness and a heaviness, especially when inside.
suxs, Loving someone this much hurts
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Runningman66
Only those of us who have lost a pet can understand the overwhelming grief + pain we suffer.Nothing has ever come close in my life to the loss + emptiness I’ve been feeling for the past 6 weeks.There’s days I just don’t want to go on anymore as I just cannot accept my boy is not coming back + my heart still aches for him every minute of every day.We can only comfort each other by expressing our feelings on here.

Love Runningman xx
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kikis_mom_1118
I'm reliving the pain again. My girl has been gone for 7 months. 2 days ago I was sleeping and just as I was walking up an immense sadness fell on me. Out of nowhere...I cried, got it together but today is just no good. I know that losing her is a part of life but it just sucks right now. I do come here once a month to write out my pain. I actually thought I was doing great but I'm not doing great today.
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Frank34
I had to put our Sammy to sleep last Thursday. My little boy. 14 years and every minute the light of my life and the love of my life. All of you are describing exactly what I'm feeling. It hurts so bad. I don't know what the answer is except keep going through each minute of each day. Just will say although we don't know each other we are sharing the same pain. So I send my love and prayers for each of you. God be with us all. Thank you for sharing. 
Frank Ward 
Frank Ward.
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Runningman66
I'm reliving the pain again. My girl has been gone for 7 months. 2 days ago I was sleeping and just as I was walking up an immense sadness fell on me. Out of nowhere...I cried, got it together but today is just no good. I know that losing her is a part of life but it just sucks right now. I do come here once a month to write out my pain. I actually thought I was doing great but I'm not doing great today.
We all feel your pain as we are all going through the experience of loss and you are not alone with the bursts of sadness as I also have them like today when I had to pull over in my van as the tears just came flowing out of nowhere like they are doing right now as I’m writing this and your right on days like these life does suck.

Virtual hugs
Love Runningman xx
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Frank34
Life shouldn't have to be like this. 
There is so much pain and loss in the world going on every day. 
God be with you all and some how bring you some peace and comfort to find the new reality and make it through. 
Frank Ward.
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Frank34
We all feel your pain as we are all going through the experience of loss and you are not alone with the bursts of sadness as I also have them like today when I had to pull over in my van as the tears just came flowing out of nowhere like they are doing right now as I’m writing this and your right on days like these life does suck.

Virtual hugs
Love Runningman xx
Frank Ward.
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Frank34
Thank you dearly. Much love in return. FW
Frank Ward.
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