Bubsmom
I am so thankful for this site.  I never post on forums like this, but I found this site so helpful, I was compelled.  I lost my sweet kitty, Bubba, Wednesday morning at 3 am.  He's been with me through everything, from college, to marriage, moving house, everything for 11 years.  He was fine all up until Sunday morning, when I noticed he wasn't eating and lethargic.  I made him an appointment at the vet Monday.  The vet said all his bloodwork was fine, but he was a bit blocked up, and was going to give him a procedure to help him go potty.  I was so relieved it wasn't serious.  He stayed at the vet overnight, and came home Tuesday afternoon.  Tuesday evening when I came home from work he was lying at the sofa struggling to breathe.  I rushed him to the emergency vet who treated him for pneumonia, but he was just too weak.  At 1 am, Wed, we got the call that there was nothing left they could do.   My mother took me to the office, and I held my baby til he was calm, and then the vet came over and administered the medication to put him down.  I was and am devastated.  

Wednesday day was just horrible.  I couldn't eat, and everytime I tried to sleep, I got severe anxiety because I kept reliving that moment over and over.  I take some comfort in knowing he was calm and with his momma, and not scared when he passed.  I hated to take him in the car and to the vet, because it stressed him so much.  I came home and looked up coping with pet loss and found this site.  I read it all day.  I felt for each and every post I read.  It was helpful to know I was not the only one out there.  I cried and cried, for them and for me.  In fact, I'm still crying as I write this.  

I'm with all of you who say it's just not reality any more.  How do you cope with a piece of you being gone?  My husband and I are taking it one day at a time.  I found today was a little better than yesterday, and I'm hoping for a little better tomorrow.  I feel silly and pathetic, as I can't bring myself to even vacuum the floor where all his pet hair is, or throw his pet scratcher away.  I'm trying to be normal for our other cat, but she seems more grieved today than she did yesterday.  She barely leaves my side, and I know she misses her Bubba.  

I'm struggling to cope, like many of you.  It was all too sudden, and he was fine just Saturday.  It makes no sense, and I still can't believe it happened.  It wasn't supposed to be like this.  He was supposed to go peacefully, in his own home, and not in a scary hospital.  I guess we'll all come to terms eventually, but, I'm just working to make it through each day.  Thank you all for listening.    
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Susie_Squillions
Oh, Bubsmom:

I am so sorry to hear about your sudden loss.  So many of us have been through it, and it's always just devastating. I'm comforted by the fact that you found this site and felt compelled to share your story.  You will find comfort and understanding here as long as you need it. No one will tell you to hurry up or to "get over it."  We all feel your immense sorrow.

Bless you for loving Bubba so well, and for trying so hard to help him recover.  Most of all, bless you for assisting him on his journey when he needed your help to be released from the body that betrayed his energetic spirit.  It's the greatest gift of love we can give them, and one that we know will cause our own suffering to begin.  ((((Bubsmom))))

Please come back and tell us more about Bubba and all of the things that made him such a special part of your family.  It helps so much to write abut the memories of happier times. It brings those memories to the forefront, even if only for a few minutes. 

You, your family and your beautiful Angel Bubba are all in my thoughts and prayers.

xoxoxo


My heart is battered and bruised, but I will not let it break. It holds such precious cargo, I must protect it now. (Susie Squillions)

"Memories of loved ones are like songs in our soul." Margaret Wakeley

T.J.'S RESIDENCY:
http://RainbowsBridge.com/residents/TJ006/Resident.htm

BUDDY GUY AYRES~LYNCH'S RESIDENCY:
http://www.rainbowsbridge.com/residents/Buddy128/resident.HTM

KING BING THE GOD CAT'S RESIDENCY:
http://rainbowsbridge.com/residents/BINGO009/Resident.htm

In one of the stars, I shall be living.
In one of them, I shall be laughing.
And so it will be as if all the stars were laughing when you look at the sky at night.
~ The Little Prince, Antoine de Saint-Exupery
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Bubsmom
Thank you so much for your support and kind words.  

I know some animals pick their people.  I was Bubba's person.  He was the lovey-est cat you'd ever meet.  Wherever I was, he wanted to be there with me.  Sleep with me on the sofa, help me with my sewing projects, and helping me with jigsaw puzzles.  He slept with me in the bed every night.  He loved to be held, and when I did hold him, he'd purr and purr, and snuggle his head up under my chin.  I always told people that I didn't need a dog, because my cat had the personality of one.  

I'm am so lucky and blessed to have been able to share his little life with him.  He was a very special cat, and I'll never in my life forget him.

And I have to add this...  I know some people report strange things, and I believe those people, and would like to add my own.  I went to work today, and about 8:00, I swear I smelled my Bubba.  He normally smelled like himself and cat food.  I was so upset, because I thought somebody was eating something and the smell just reminded me of him so much, I had to leave my cubicle.  It wasn't until about an hour later that it occurred to me, that what I was smelling, could have been my little sweetie's spirit, letting me know he was ok.  Because seriously, who eats anything that smells like cat food?  I guess I was just so jumbled at the time that I didn't think of it.  But, I think of it now, and it makes me smile.  Even if I was just imagining the whole thing.        
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creampuff
Bubsmom, I feel your pain and sorrow.  You are not alone, we here at rainbow bridge have all been through the emotions you are going through right now.  A sudden loss of a fur baby is so horrible.  We don't understand why this happens, when your precious little one seemed so healthy for so long.  I understand this so well.  My Bubba Lou was fine one minute, having a seizure the next minute, and dead in my arms within 10 seconds.  I have been through the grief you now are going through and I understand it's depth.  But I can promise you this.... it will get easier in time.  Just feel Bubba's angel spirit hovering above you, sending you angelic purrs and kisses.  He is still with you, but in spirit now, and you have to feel his presence.  You will see him again someday.  The precious memories of your time together with him will begin to heal your heart and comfort you as the days go by.  Please keep connected with us.  We all care for you and understand.   Jane 

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