Oh, Evelyn, bless your heart. It brings tears to my eyes to read your post because, although your post is very short, I can feel the pain you are experiencing. It breaks my heart because it brings back the memory of that excrutiating pain. Although there are no words I can say to take away the pain you are feeling right now, please know my heart is with you. I'm sure as you held Mandy, she felt secure and at peace in her final moments because she knew how much you loved her. As you say, she is in a better place now, however, we are left with such an emptiness and sadness without their presence. I believe she is still close by wanting you to be comforted. Her spirit and love for you continues. My boy was very sick too and I was fortunate to be able to hold him in my arms as he passed just as you were able to do with Mandy. So, I understand totally that even when they are very sick and you know they are out of pain and in a better place, it still hurts so deeply. Here at this site, we understand that this can be the most difficult loss ever because there is no other love quite like it. Please just know that we are here for you to help you get through these first few days, weeks, months. There are many caring people here who understand. I am so, so sorry. My thoughts and prayers are with you tonight.