SherryM
I’m drowning in grief, my kitty Cloud crossed the rainbow bridge yesterday. We only had her for 3 years, we adopted her from our local shelter. My vet thinks she was 12 or so. It was love at first sight. She was so sweet and loving, she was truly my anchor in the storms of life.  However, she had nearly constant health issues from the time we brought her home, and started having serious GI problems 9 months ago. The vet thought it was IBD but she didn’t respond to any of the meds as anticipated. She suffered through months of horrific diarrhea. Two weeks ago we did another ultrasound and this time they found a mass, which the vet said was Adenocarcinoma. There are no good treatments for it, it is always fatal. I was determined to give her palliative care and hopefully hospice. But she began vomiting the contents of her intestines during the weekend (it is known as fecal vomiting), because her intestine was starting to become blocked, which the vet had warned me would happen over time, I just had not anticipated it would be right away. The weekend was awful I could see she was suffering from so much pain that would only get worse, and my vet was concerned her intestine could rupture.  I decided I could not put her through any more of this pain and trauma and opted for euthanasia yesterday morning. I am just sick with grief, I miss her so much. The house is empty and sad without her loving spirit. I just needed to be with others who understand. My heart goes out to all of you for the losses you are dealing with. ❤️❤️
Sherry Morgado 
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JulieF
Sherry - You gave a lot of love to Cloud and I am so sorry for what the two of you went through.  You gave her everything you could and she was suck a lucky girl to have found you as her mom.  You did the very best you could for her and she knows it.  It is so hard to see them suffering and know there is little we can do other than to end their pain.  You gave her a gift.  She is happy now - out of pain and in a sunny, warm place where she can eat all she wants without feeling sick.  Hugs to you.
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SherryM
Thank you JulieF. Six months ago they did an ultrasound and biopsies and it came back inconclusive. She also had a GI blood panel which was normal. Now that I have read up on Adenocarcinoma, I realize what she experienced is classic and typical. It is stealthy, doesn’t show up on tests until much later in its growth and why it did not respond to meds. I should add she was on pain meds and steroids which gave her comfort until they were not enough for the tumor’s growth. She was loved so much. I am feeling better that we truly did all we could. It is still heartbreaking to lose such a sweet soul who filled my life with love. My brother died 18 months ago, and he was the kindest person ever. I know he is taking care of her for me. 
Sherry Morgado 
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Memories_of_Marmalade
Dear Sherry,

I am so sorry and saddened to learn of the loss of your beloved "Cloud." It is so easy to read in your words just how much you loved her and cared for her. Thank you for adopting her when you did especially at her age of 12. As you know the older cats (and dogs) are quite often not adopted from shelters and are forgotten. So for a senior pet to be welcomed into a new home with a loving, caring, compassionate family is just wonderful. 

My paths crossed with my own cat "Marmalade" (who was a stray / feral) when he was believed to be around 8 years old. So it was thought that he was also around 12 when he passed away (I felt I had to put him down due to multiple health issues.) He was a bright, shining star in my life and I loved him so, as you loved your "Cloud." (< great name by the way.)

I'm sorry for what your "Cloud" and you and yours had to endure, but I am very glad that all of your paths crossed when they did, that you made her a part of your family and that for the final years of "Cloud's" life, she had a home, family, comfort, safety and tender loving care. All cats should be so blessed and all humans should be too, to know and experience the love that you felt for "Cloud."

I hope you and yours continue to travel through time and heal as best you can. You are not alone. We are with you in comradeship and spirit as is your "Cloud."

My kindest regards & my sincerest condolences,
James
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mybestgirlSiffie
Oh, my heart is breaking for you @SherryM. You are so strong. You said such kind words to me on my post and my heart aches to hear the details of the suffering for you and Cloud both. I have had a few cats throughout my life, I can only imagine the strength and constancy she must have offered you during the short time you had together. Sending you love.
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Bigcatsdad
I'm so very sorry for your loss of your kitty Cloud.
It's such a heart breaking experience. 11 weeks ago we had to make that same painful decision to put down Albert, my big black cat and best bud of 16 years. Like Cloud he developed an inoperable mass in his abdomen and he was hardly eating or drinking, vomiting and loosing weight and in pain. I know your feeling as this was the most painful decision I've ever had to make and the most heart breaking experience I've gone through. We just don't realize how close and attached we become to our little ones until we have to say goodbye then its devastating. I hope you can take a little comfort in that for the 3 years you were together you gave Cloud a good loving home and provided good care as best you could and she knows that and that you loved her.
This forum is very good, you are surrounded here by others that know your pain and sadness and are here for your support, you are not alone.
My heart goes out to you.
-Jeff
Bigcatsdad
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SherryM
Bigcatsdad,
thank you, this forum has helped immensely. I am so sorry as well for your loss, I understand how special your Albert was, I can see clearly the love you shared. I found a book on Amazon that may also help all of us who lost a very special cat, it is Soul Comfort for Cat Lovers. I downloaded the Kindle version so I could read it right away.  The author also lost a dear cat which lead her to write this book. It is very helpful and supportive. 5 days on, and I am starting to find a small measure of peace in memories of when she was healthy. It is getting slightly less overwhelming each day. I feel her loving spirit is with me, telling me she is so happy to be free of her body that hurt, and she is in a place of complete peace. I wish you continued healing, and hope you can be comforted in the knowledge that you shared such a deep love with Albert that death of the physical body cannot destroy. Thank you for reaching out. 
Sherry Morgado 
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Bigcatsdad
Thank you for your kind words as well.
I'm glad you are feeling a little bit better, the weight of sorrow slowly gets a little lighter each week. I will check out he book you recommended, that sounds like it is well worth reading. Things with help and support are always welcome.
-Jeff
Bigcatsdad
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