Peej
Yesterday I had to make the most devastating decision to lose my boy, my beautiful Hoolio, my English springer spaniel.
In February we adopted 2 young children, a boy and a girl. The boy was only 7 months at the time. Now, he is 16 months old, and yesterday Hoolio went for my son. I made the most stupid mistake of turning my back while my son was crawling around, and I still don't know what happened but all I heard was a growl and a bit of a scuffle and then my son crying. He was bleeding from all over his face and I took him to a&e. It seems to look worse than it is, but we are very fortunate and lucky that it wasn't worse.
Unfortunately this is the second time this has happened (it happened to a different child, just nowhere near as bad, and the child was a lot older and bigger). We spoke to a vet who gave us our options.
I absolutely hate myself for choosing the decision to let my boy go, but we didn't have a choice. Hoolio was my soulmate and my special boy and I miss him so so so much. I can't stop crying and hating myself, not only for making that decision, but for putting my boy in the position that I had to make that decision. I feel like I won't ever get over this and I can't stop picturing hoolio's face as it was happening, he was looking me straight in the eyes as we went through with it, and I feel like I failed him. He deserved better than what I gave him, and I will never forgive myself.
Quote 0 0