Cjais
I lost me dog yesterday following her having a heart attack. She had a heart murmur which has been getting increasingly worse, but she was being medicated for this and seemed to really improve.

I am completely overwhelmed with grief. She has been such a huge part of my life for over 11 years and I just don't know how to deal with her not being here any more.

I have lost family members before, which is extremely hard, but losing my beautiful dog has broken my heart and I just don't know what to do.

It all happened so quickly and I just didn't have a chance to do anything to try to help her. I keep going over and over everything in head in case I could have done something. I am just glad that I was at home when it happened and that she wasn't on her own.

Waking up this morning was awful. Every morning, me and her would have a cuddle on the sofa while I have my coffee and before taking her for her morning walk. This morning, I just didn't know how to function without being able to pick her up and give her a cuddle.

How have other people coped with this overwhelming loss?
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msweet13
Dearest Claire - I am so very sorry for your loss. What a sweet precious furbaby. Seeing the photo made me want to just scoop her up and cradle her in my arms. My Brutus also had a heart murmur that developed into congestive heart failure and he died 12 weeks ago. He was 11.5 years old. The day started out fine, but then he was in distress and died at the vet's after unsuccessful attempts to intervene. The vet said one of his heart valves must have failed. I am still in deep pain and I invite you to read all my posts to see if anything may help you in your journey. You have come to the right place to see how others have managed to cope with incredible loss of their beloved furbabies. You are not alone--everyone on this site is/has been in the very same place you are now and they understand. I wish warm hugs and blessings of comfort.
Denise (Brutus' Mom)
Brutus von Dolce
06/19/2006 - 03/16/2018
RIP my sweet beautiful boy
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Ginger4256
Claire
I am so sorry for your loss of your baby. My Boo also died 5 weeks ago of CHF. I know the pain you are in. Today and this weekend try to just remember how much she loved you. She loved you more than anything in this world. I know you loved her equally. You have a rough time ahead but know you have found the right place to share your grief. Everyone here knows exactly what you feel right now. I pray that you can find peace.
Boo' s mommy
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mistybmanes
I lost my Annabelle Tuesday so I understand your pain. I am lost without her. We had our daily routine too and it seems strange not to do those little things each day. I pray for strength and comfort for you during this difficult time.
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Cjais
Thank you everyone, your support means a lot to me and I too am very sorry to hear about your losses.

I just can't seem to function at the moment. I have experienced grief before, but this is just an awful crippling pain. I've spent the day crying my eyes out and just wanting to give my furry baby a cuddle for one last time. She was everything to me and looked after me through some really hard times. She always knew when something was wrong and would give me the best cuddles. Usually, when I am sad or crying, she would follow me around everywhere and not leave my side, and that's what I want and need right now, yet I can't have it 😢
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Tankie12
It is so hard to endure this loss, the pain is immense and yes, different, more intense than we’ve felt, even with family deaths. You spent your days and nights togather for years. Purpose seems to have gone, and nothing seems real. The world is not right, nothing matters. It’s surreal. We are here, to listen, console, allow you to grieve, as we travel this uncharted path togather. And their is no one way to grieve and it can go on for a very long time. Their is no wrong or right way, it’s grief. Remember how wonderful and joyful and blessed you and your baby were to find each other. We can’t physically touch them but I know their spirit lives. Nothing so beautiful and pure can just vanish, loving so immensely cant just leave, we will see them again, when the time comes how wonderful it will be,,,, be extra good to you right now
Lynn, Tankie’s mom, forever
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Sylvee
I am so very sorry for the loss of your beloved best friend. I know it feels like you can't get through the next five minutes, let alone the future. The hurt is so deep that you don't think your heart will ever mend. I share your grief.

My beloved best friend Bootsie died 5 mornings ago, we were together for 14 years. I'm in my 60's and live alone. Friends have moved away, I have no kids, all other family lives across the country and I feel so very alone. Utterly alone.

I miss her so much, it hurts so very deeply, everything about the world feels wrong, empty, grey. The hole in my heart is painful. 

It didn't matter that I didn't have anyone close-by before, because Bootsie was with me and we were together. I used to whisper in her ear that all is well because we've got each other.

The only way I can climb the stairs for bed is by pretending she is sleeping in the other room. I listen for her, look for her. The silence in the house is deafening and all I do is weep with a tightness around my chest and nausea.

I wish for you the same as I wish for myself, that we will be able to begin to heal, to come to a place of peace. All I want is my Bootsie back.


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Cjais
Sylvee wrote:
I am so very sorry for the loss of your beloved best friend. I know it feels like you can't get through the next five minutes, let alone the future. The hurt is so deep that you don't think your heart will ever mend. I share your grief.

My beloved best friend Bootsie died 5 mornings ago, we were together for 14 years. I'm in my 60's and live alone. Friends have moved away, I have no kids, all other family lives across the country and I feel so very alone. Utterly alone.

I miss her so much, it hurts so very deeply, everything about the world feels wrong, empty, grey. The hole in my heart is painful. 

It didn't matter that I didn't have anyone close-by before, because Bootsie was with me and we were together. I used to whisper in her ear that all is well because we've got each other.

The only way I can climb the stairs for bed is by pretending she is sleeping in the other room. I listen for her, look for her. The silence in the house is deafening and all I do is weep with a tightness around my chest and nausea.

I wish for you the same as I wish for myself, that we will be able to begin to heal, to come to a place of peace. All I want is my Bootsie back.





Sylvee, I am so sorry about your loss too and I cried reading your message, because everything that you have just said, is exactly how I feel. The silence in my house is deafening too. I keep listening out for the tiny little patter of paws on the tiled floor, her little growls and barks when someone walks past the window, the little noise she made as she yawned. Most of all, I miss the cuddles that she would give me, she always gave the best cuddles.

It all just happened so fast. One minute she was fine, the next minute her heart was almost pounding out of her chest. Before I even had the chance to pick up the phone and call the vet, she had slipped away in my arms. I'm surprised I didn't have my neighbours banging my door down from the scream I let out.

I'm am completely lost and utterly heartbroken.

I too wish the same for you as I do for me, that one day we can both find a place of peace xx
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catiebee
Hi Claire,
 
I'm so, so sorry. It really does feel impossible to bear, to live through, especially in the early days of grief. It feels like there is nothing else in the world except the brokenheartedness and pain. I'm so sorry you had no notice and that she slipped away so fast. I realize it's a small consolation that she didn't suffer and that she went without your having to intervene.

I wish it didn't take so long for our hearts to heal. I wish the grief wasn't so fierce and all-consuming. It can feel like our hearts are completely torn out. Such a terrible pain.

I hope it helps just a little to know you're not alone and others understand and are on this journey with you. Hugs!


Catie
-Missing Marissa deeply
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Cjais
I came across this site last night and created a memorial page for my beloved Poppy.

https://www.ilovedmypet.com/memorials/view?preview=&id=59343&bkgdcolour=transparent&bkgdfile=graypaws.gif&bkgdrepeat=repeat

Being able to share memories of Poppy doesn't bring her back, but has made me feel like I am honering her.

I'm still really struggling though. I just don't know what to do with myself and have moments where I just can't stop crying. She was my life and meant everything to me, so losing her has caused an unbelievable grief, more grief than I have ever felt before.
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catiebee
That's a lovely tribute to Poppy, Claire.

I'm very sorry you're suffering so much. I think most of us here can agree with you, that the levels of grief we experienced stunned us. It's a very hard journey. 

Keep letting your tears flow as needed. There's healing in them. Express the hurt any way you can. Hugs to you and wishing you comfort.
Catie
-Missing Marissa deeply
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ourwonderfulkitty
I just came to this forum related to my search for support related to the loss of our wonderful kitty,
and just read the most recent post, this one,  and the responses to the post
were so touching and kind and understanding, and those are helping me
in what I am going thru now.  Thus I wanted to reply here.

To Cjais, my thoughts are with you, and what you said resonated with me so much since
its what I'm going thru now as well.

To Sylvee, yes, I too have no family nearby or who would understand about this,
nor other friends in general, so my wonderful kitty was even so much more important
in that way.  I live in an area where there are many senior citizens and see them
walking their dogs and realize just how important that love and bond of our pets
can be to those of us who might be older and with many health issues and no or very
few friends or family (though of course the love our pets give us knows no age
or health condition)

My best to all of you.
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Sylvee
Thank you Cjais and ourwonderfulkitty so much for your support, kind words and for sharing your story of love. We travel this difficult and lonely road together.  It was one week ago this morning that Bootsie died. I'm never going to be the same again without her, she really was my best friend. We have to find the strength to move forward somehow without our beloved best friends. Minute by minute, day by day. We must hang onto the belief that our hearts will heal, that remembering them will one day give us joy not the intense pain we feel today. Having my beloved Bootsie to share 14yrs of my life was a gift. She enriched my life so very much. I will never ever forget her. Typing these words hurt because in a way, it confirms she's gone. The love remains.
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