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littleguy

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Reply with quote  #76 
hey bubbies its 7 weeks today since you left us and my heart aches as bad today as it  did that 1st horrible day the worst day of my life and this so called life hasn't been  an easy one . how I miss you so much just everything about you , two things happened yesterday that just got the best me the 1st one was that they are  flying that stupid goodyear blimp over the stadium and it is just right there almost in your backyard and I know you would have been out there just having a fit over that thing just like you used to do as you would stay out there for hours and talk and fight with that thing until it left ,the 2nd thing was that your farther went to the backyard had a fire going in the fire pit  and wanted me to come out and enjoy it with him and when I told him I wasn't going out there he kept pushing as to why and then asked if it was because what happen back there ,well what does he think I just cant go to the place you passed away and sit there looking at it and  even come close to having a good time as I have been miserable since you left me and just everyone keeps asking me what's wrong as they say I seem withdrawn and have lost a lot of weight which I needed to anyways .but what does anyone think is wrong I lost the love of my life 7 weeks ago as I believe you and your brothers are my true loves but especially you as you never wanted much just some love and was just happy with the life I tried to give you .but I just cant seem to get or you or move on any as life just isn't right without you here with me .I just cant wait to see you again .

love mommy 
 

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littleguy

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Reply with quote  #77 
bubbies just wanted to say hi to you and that I love you ,bubbies I'm so distracted  from my everyday life I try to stay focused on things  but I cant I just keep messing up everything life will just never be the same without you here as I cant keep anything on my mind but you and now all I do is worry about your brothers as I'm so afraid to leave them ,afraid to get that call again .I leave and everything seems fine then a few hours later my world falls apart with one stupid phone call like with you my dear boy and I just feel I cant it again I'm just not that strong . please give me another sign that your still with me and that you forgive me also that your healthy and happy. love and miss you so much

mommy  

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littleguy

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Reply with quote  #78 
oh littleguy I miss miss miss you so as I always knew it wouldn't take much to just completely send me over the edge with my depression anxiety and so on and I think losing you was that last push as I just cant get over this as I still cry everyday not all day but everyday ,I just miss you so much.

love mommy       

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littleguy

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Reply with quote  #79 
my sweet boy I miss you and love you so much.

love mommy

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littleguy

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Reply with quote  #80 
dear littleguy today is just a sad day for your daddy and myself as we decided that we need to go through the thousands of pictures of you and your brothers  that your dad took and pick out the one for the front of the box that holds your ashes as it not right that your picture is not on it as it still has the sample picture in your place .we both wanted to wait until we were ready but I don't think I'm ready but your dad says he needs to put some sort of closure in his life now so I will go along with him as I dont think I will ever have closure . but in all of this I did smile a few times as we have some beautiful pictures of you with the biggest smile on your face and that makes me happy to actually see what a happy life you had as I knew you had a happy life but to see it in those pictures really makes me happy to know in your short life that we did all we could to make sure it was a great life and I really think you were  happy and we were blessed that we got to have your for those years in our lives as you made me a better person with the love you gave to all and which continues after your passing,I cant wait until I see you again.

love and miss you so much
mommy      

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littleguy

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Reply with quote  #81 
my sweet boy I love and miss you so much as i have never grieved over anyone or thing for this long .love and miss you .until we meet again

love mommy

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littleguy

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Reply with quote  #82 
I love you my boy and cant wait until I see you again until then please watch over cade and the other boys and always remember you are and always will be my bubbies no one else will ever take your place no matter how many more come home to a good life you will always be the one .

love and miss you

mommy  

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littleguy

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Reply with quote  #83 
8 weeks today dear boy and I'm still as lost today as that 1st day ,nothing has been good since you left  nothing I just feel like my entire life has fallen apart without you .I don't keep a focus on anything and really would not care if I was blessed enough to be able to be with you right now  as nothing matters anymore and things just are not right and never will be and this life just isn't fair without you .

love you
mommy

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littleguy

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Reply with quote  #84 
I just miss you so much everyday every hour every minute every second its not any better my dear boy and I just want to see you again


love mommy  

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littleguy

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Reply with quote  #85 
littleguy this will be short as I have already cried over you 3 times today as someone I hadn't seen in a while but had heard about you told me how sorry they were as they have a newf too and I'm still crying now but anytime your name is brought up I try not to cry but I still do as I miss you so so much

love mommy   

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MySweetSammie

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Reply with quote  #86 
I'm so sorry for your struggle. I know how much you love him and miss him. Your bond is so clear in your postings. I can't believe my Sammie has been gone 24 days already. Time keeps moving, but my heart still stands still. I miss him and cry for him everyday. I still hibernate in my room when not working because the house just doesn't feel right with one baby missing. Your kind words of understanding to me since I have joined this forum have been so appreciated, I just wanted to let you know you are not alone.
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littleguy

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Reply with quote  #87 
thank you so much MySweetSammie  and I know other people on this forum are devastated over the loss of there fur baby and continue to hurt after time,but somehow as I have read your posts also with plenty of others I just feel that your connection with your baby was just like mine with my littleguy as I really don't think I have ever felt this kind of loss before and yes I have lost loved ones human and fur babies but it never felt like this and went on so long as it will be 2 months Monday and there has not been one day that I haven't cried and hurt over him and like you say your house doesn't feel right with your baby missing ,I hate this house now as yes it holds good memories but this is were my baby took his last breath and I cant bear that thought as I see him every where I turn in this house but cant touch him ,hug him or anything else and its heart breaking and there are so many of us going through this same hurt,pain and loneliness but we all loved our babies in different ways and I truly hope that you just lie myself and others find peace and comfort in time .

thanks so much
littleguys mom       

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littleguy

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Reply with quote  #88 
littleguy

mommy just misses and loves you so much and cant wait to meet you at the bridge

love mommy

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littleguy

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Reply with quote  #89 
my love to the only one in life that really ever gave me true unconditional love ,I love and miss you so .

love mommy

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littleguy

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Reply with quote  #90 
my sweet littleguy its 2 months today since you left us and I have been up all night crying as for some reason this is overwhelming me right now worse then usual and your father keeps asking me if I'm ok well I'm not and never will be as I cant say there has been a good day since you have been gone. because you were my dog I knew true unconditional love and I have deep love with your brothers but not like yours cade is probably the closest as not like humans you never lied ,cheated ,disappointed ,let me down ,never showed up , never gave me attitude , never unkindness ,never expected more then I could give ,never set expectations that could never possibly be meet all you ever did was give me the best 7 years of my life of knowing your unconditional love and always being satisfied with what I could do for you and give you and that was always enough for you and no one will ever truly know love until they have loved a dog  and it has loved them back for a long as you do what is expected of you they will show you true love ,littleguy I would just give anything to just hear you bark at the air 1 more time or to meet me at the fence when I come home from work and your talking to me in that tone you did when I was late for some reason ,I just miss and love you so much and today would not be soon enough to see you again my love .

love mommy

ps. I have to wipe all the tears off the keyboard I'm surprised it didn't short out        

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