CoriSnyder
Its been two weeks, and one day, and 4 hours since I made the worst decision of my life and had Max, my 14 year old white lab put to sleep.
I am completely devastated, cannot sleep at night, cannot concentrate at work, cry all the time, have such physical pain, a milion tons on my chest. I miss him so much, I love him more and more each minute and dont know how I am supposed to find a reason to my life anymore. He was my entire world and I was his.  I couldnt wait to see him each day, and wake up seeing his face light up when he saw  me.
I know our quality of life was fading.. i worked from home because he could not stand up on his own, had severe anxiety when I left to shower for 10 minutes, more than a couple of nights recently he could not get up to come inside so I slept outside with him in 20 degrees.. and during the day he refused to come inside, even when it was pouring. I would stay outside with him with umbrellas, and bought him jackets, and cooked for him.  He had such limited mobility, and at times I feared he was in pain.  I couldnt stand the though of him having a horrible accident and dying in pain....and made that fateful decision. But now I regret losing him, and I know in my heart all he wants is to be with me.
Each second is a struggle, everything in life seems insignificant compared to our life together, even though we were not able to leave the house for the past year and half... we had our special bond. I am lost and alone and would give anything to go back in time and change it all.  I am so heartbroken and crushed and dont know how this will ever get easier.
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AllysMom
Cori,

I am so sorry for your loss.  Max sounds like such a wonderful dog and it's obvious from your post that you loved him dearly and he loved you just as much.  I completely understand what you are feeling as I have gone through many of the same emotions since I had to let my Ally pass in August.  It's clear that you did absolutely everything in the world for Max and gave him a wonderful life full of love.  During Ally's last year, she had numerous health issues which I think in an odd way made our bond even stronger.  She and I went through so much together, just as you and Max did.  Even though I have two other dogs who I love dearly, I too have felt so alone since Ally died.  No other dog will ever replace her.  Shortly after Ally's passing, there were some days I could barely function - I missed Ally so much that I would breakdown and just cry for hours.  Life just wasn't the same without her.  I promise you it will get easier.  You are going through the most difficult time now.  Try to remember all the good times you shared with Max and know that you are the reason that he had such a great life and that he loves you dearly, he's pain free and happy now and up there running and playing with all of our sweet fur babies.

Try to write about Max when you can as I found it helped me tremendously to tell Ally's story.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Ally's Mom - Karen
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Lil_Odie
very sorry about your loss.   yes this is the hardest thing ive ever gone through also
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csavoia
Hello. I am so very sorry for your loss. I never realized as my wife didn't as well, that the pain would be so intense following the loss. I am hoping you get support on this forum such as I have gotten in  the past couple days. I find the chat room to be very useful and helpful to me. Someone had mentioned writing a letter to y dog and I did and I have to tell you it does help. Perhaps you can do that for your Max.

It sounds like you and I have some of the same issues. The past few years I was home all day and night with my Connie and Selby and that's why I feel such an emptiness in my home right now. But having Selby nearby is extremely helpful.

I hope you can learn in time to realize that you did the greatest unselfish move by letting him be put to sleep and no longer be in pain. This was I could not get my head around, the fact that I took her life was eating away at me but then when I started understanding why I did what I did it actually made me feel real good knowing that I was able to end her suffering and that her tail is wagging at the rainbow's bridge just hanging out with all the other furbabies waiting until we meet again and climb into heaven together.

Feel free to message me anytime if you have problems coping. I too find it hard but I know I did the right thing and that carries me through each day.
RIP CONNIE
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Rudy
Cori,


  I am so sorry to hear about your loss of Max.  I can relate as two weeks ago I had to make the still haunting decision to put my beloved Roxy to sleep due to injuries sustained in a dog attack.  I definitely know what you are going through right now.  The bonds that we form with our furry baby's are very special and will forever be in our hearts. 
  I want you to know that although it was a very painful decision that you wish you could take back, like I wish i could take mine back. you did the right thing for Max and had his best interests and well being at heart.  I too am having a hard time coping with my loss, but please know you are not alone and things will get better.  Your love and devotion to Max is touching.  Remember all the times you spent with Max and how he always made you smile and he will forever live on in your heart.  Doing this has helped me to cope with my loss, and although Max can never be replaced, he will forever live on in your heart and memories and you will one day be reunited with Max, just like I will be with Roxy.  Take care Cori.

My Thoughts and Prayers are with you 


Rudy (Roxy's Daddy)
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CoriSnyder

Oh Rudy, I am so sorry for Roxy! It is just heart breaking when we lose them.

Thank you so much for your support... I know that Max will always be a special part of my life and because of him, so many friendships have emerged and been strenghened.  The world really was a better place with him in it.

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csavoia
it has gotten easier for me since I have come out here and talked about my girl Connie. One in a million dogs are just that, one in a million. I am sad so sad that she is gone but then I feel truily blessed that I got to have her as my own for over 15 years
RIP CONNIE
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