Momtozeus
Hi everyone,
I have been doing a little better , day by day , week by week.... trying my best to process and work through my grief. I lost my little boy Zeus on July 16th and my heart broke and my world shattered. I miss him so desperately and wish daily that he was still here with me.
I have been trying to keep myself very busy, and out of the house as much as possible. I dog sat for a week hoping it would give me comfort to have a dog to snuggle with and take care of, and it was. I then left town for 4 days to help someone dear move in and get settled. And during all that time, which was back to back I was so busy and occupied , I wasn’t dealing with my own feelings which I only realized on the long drive back home. The closer I got to home, the more it became clear I was going home to Zeus not being there.
I feel like if I try to keep busy, it’s like I’m trying to forget him and then it hits me even harder. Is this a normal part of grieving, or should I ‘be over it’ as it’s been insinuated to me recently?
I think maybe I was suppressing my feelings and that is why I feel overwhelmed at this moment... trying to keep busy is one thing, but hiding from my feelings is another.
Or maybe it’s just a bad day. Thanks for listening 💕
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Memories_of_Marmalade


Dear Michelle,

Oh sweetheart, what you are feeling is what MANY of us here are feeling. It's discussed in thread after thread. The feeling that "we are somehow forgetting our beloved's if we heal and move on." It is almost like we want to pay penance. 

Penance 

(pĕn′əns)

1. An act of self-mortification or devotion performed voluntarily to show sorrow for a sin or other wrongdoing.

2. 
A sacrament in some Christian churches that includes contrition, confession to a priest, acceptance of punishment, and absolution.

But as we have all discussed here, our beloved pets would never, not ever want us to feel sad, depressed, guilty or be in continuous greif. They were all about providing us with consistent, unconditional love, affection and adoration. They enjoyed seeing us smile and laugh and be happy. So that is what they would want from each of us here now. They would want us to remember them fondly obviously, but they would want us to heal. And to be happy again. As impossible as that seems. By doing so, we truly honor them and their memory.

Kind regards,
James
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FClaire
Momtozeus wrote:
Hi everyone,
I have been doing a little better , day by day , week by week.... trying my best to process and work through my grief. I lost my little boy Zeus on July 16th and my heart broke and my world shattered. I miss him so desperately and wish daily that he was still here with me.
I have been trying to keep myself very busy, and out of the house as much as possible. I dog sat for a week hoping it would give me comfort to have a dog to snuggle with and take care of, and it was. I then left town for 4 days to help someone dear move in and get settled. And during all that time, which was back to back I was so busy and occupied , I wasn’t dealing with my own feelings which I only realized on the long drive back home. The closer I got to home, the more it became clear I was going home to Zeus not being there.
I feel like if I try to keep busy, it’s like I’m trying to forget him and then it hits me even harder. Is this a normal part of grieving, or should I ‘be over it’ as it’s been insinuated to me recently?
I think maybe I was suppressing my feelings and that is why I feel overwhelmed at this moment... trying to keep busy is one thing, but hiding from my feelings is another.
Or maybe it’s just a bad day. Thanks for listening 💕
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FClaire
I feel exactly the same at this moment in time. I'm scared of moving forward, or like you say, when you are doing things it feels like you are trying to forget them. Each day is definitely a rollercoaster of emotions. I'm also around people who think I should be over it. They just dont understand, so I choose not to let it get to me. I will grieve forever how long it takes over my Ollie. I dont like feeling like this, but he was absolutely worth it. I miss him so so much. Still feels like I'm in a bad dream. 18 days later. Another bad day too. Sorry for rambling! Xxx
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Momtozeus
Dear James,
Thank you ❤️❤️❤️
I hope all goes well with your doctor and that you feel better.
Michelle
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Momtozeus
FClaire ... I am sorry.. it is so hard to go through this. I Understand how you feel and it’s nice to have other people that feel as we do that we can talk to that get it. Hope tomorrow is a better day for you. 💕
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FClaire
And Itruly hope the same for you too xxx
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Miasmom_704
Oh momtozeus, no you are not moving away from your baby because you are trying to keep busy.  We are all trying to deal with our grief day by day.  I know that the grief comes in waves also. 

I lost my baby on July 2 and when I come home it is the worst time.  I live alone and she isn't there anymore.  People who say that "you should be over it" just anger me.  First, no one should have a judgment on anyone else's grief.  There is no time limit on grief.  I don't share my feelings with anyone about my baby.  If they never loved an animal, or bonded with an animal, they won't understand.  I won't talk about Mia at work now.  I'll only speak and cry with people who truly understand like everyone here on the Bridge.

They would want us to go on, but even though we take the steps to go on, we are not losing or forgetting them. We live in spite of that pain.  The depth of our love for them has altered us forever. 

We're all taking one hour, one day at a time.

With peace,

Mia's Mom
Mia’s Mom
Please visit Mia’s memorial
Visit Mia's Rainbow Bridge Memorial Residency

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