pinacoloda1
My cat Jack ran away about a month ago now and has not come home yet.
I still grieve. He was my sole companion,as i live alone,giving me his unconditional love for a little over a year. I miss having him around and would like another "companion",but feel like i would be giving up on him and dis-honoring his memory. How do you move past that? I feel as if i would be simply "replacing" him.
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Buster2011
Hi, sorry to hear that your cat has gone on an 'adventure ' and hope you get closure. You cannot replace a beautiful soul, your love and companion, BUT you can fill the void and broken heart and remember him with fondness , much love , and giving another cat a chance of a happy home. You will love him/her for their own personality. So dont feel guilty.

Good luck and best wishes x
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pinacoloda1
😉thankyou
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Gingers_Mommy
Hi Jhonnie, I'm sorry for the loss of Jack. I had a cat that was both indoor and outdoor. The night of 9/29/19 she didn't come back. The next night neighbors confirmed they had seen a cat of her description dead. Run over apparently. I never saw her body. We can't know for sure exactly what happened to Jack. I wish of course that maybe someone took him in and not that he met his end. I'm so sorry that uncertainty remains. Either for you means you are grieving his loss. I can def relate bcs I too live alone. I have yet to get another pet, but I def know I will adopt soon. I know no other pet can ever replace the one we lost but if there's room to love another then you should certainly consider the option when you're ready. I volunteer at a cat adoption center in my neighborhood and there are many adult cats and kittens in need if adoption.

Wishing you peace and healing.
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Memories_of_Marmalade

Dear Johnnie,

Firstly please allow me to express to you my sadness at learning that your beloved Jack had not returned home yet. As I've written here on the forum, I've been endeavoring to feed stray and feral cats when I can, for 5 1/2 years now for the time that I live in New Mexico USA and now back here in Los Angeles, Ca.

What I have learned, knowing feral and stray cats is they DO at times, for odd reasons, move on and are adopted by other families. It makes no sense, but I have witnessed this first hand on. One seemingly stray cat in New Mexico, a giant, muscular orange Tabby Tom-Cat I named "Tommy", would stop by to see us each morning for breakfast and then leave a bit later and walk somewhere. I tried to follow him somewhere but could not all the way to his destination point, as he would walk through small fence openings moving with purpose each day from the backyards of house to house. Another seemingly stray cat was a small female we named "Figaro." She was a small long-haired Tuxedo cat. We became close and when I was preparing to depart New Mexico a neighbor who only spoke Mexican (which was translated for me) approached and said "Please don't take my cat." We had no idea that Figaro was his cat!

Here in Los Angeles, another cat named "Fleas" that was a neighbors cat, moved across the street to another neighbor for some reason. And they ended up having joint custody for 14 years. With Fleas going back and forth. 

As we know, friendly cats can make friends. And at times, if they are considered stray? And meet and are pet by a stranger? They can be mistakenly assume as not being a part of a family and placed in a car or taken into a home by accident. It happens all the time.

My cat was a feral / stray I named Marmalade. He was a proud, regal, wise, loving, kind and friendly orange Tabby Tom-Cat whom I crossed paths with in the high desert county of New Mexico. Tommy and Figaro were a part of Marmalade's colony, of which he was KING. He was loved and adored by the females in the colony, trusted with the kittens, and respected and feared by the males, even though Marmalade was smaller, scrawny, chronically ill and near completely deaf. But he was one Hell of a scraper. He ended up coming with me to Los Angeles in 2017. We were homeless and living on the road for 3 1/2 months that year and he never ever abandoned me. He was my best friend and his companionship, devotion, loyalty and love saved my life from suicide countless times, for the time that we were together.

I was forced to have Marmalade put down in May of 2019. He was becoming a shadow of himself. This was after he had a fight against a large feral Tom-Cat in our neighborhood I named "Blackie." Blackie was harassing my neighbors cat, named "Star" who Marmalade considered his girlfriend, after she gave him a nose kiss once. Marmalade never recovered from an injury to his left ear that he sustained during the fight. And he had complications (possibly a stroke) during surgery. Like your Jack, Marmalade was my only companion. He was also my only family.

After Marmalade was gone, I came across a feral kitten, who had been attacked by a coyote and bitten twice. On the scruff of his neck and hind quarters. He is a Tuxedo cat with a small black mustache, so I named him KID after the classic silent Charlie Chaplin movie "The Kid" about an orphan who is adopted by a misfit. KID got curious and entered and triggered a trap at a neighbors abandoned house a few buildings down from my office and I came upon him crying for help and mercy. (I had been feeding him for a few weeks at that time.) I took KID in and got him medical attention. I was not intended on adopting him, I was only planning on fostering / training him, but soon he captured my heart. 

I can not tell you the amount of times I have been down and depressed about losing my Marmalade, and sinking into melancholia and KID will catch my eye, and do something completely loving, entertaining, silly or goofy and immediately makes me laugh and smile again. 

There are so, so many homeless cats that are in such dire need of a home, love, affection and adoration. Your adopting another cat would actually honoring your love for Jack. It would be the reverse. It is all in the perspective. I tell Marmalade's ashes about KID each night. About how KID is doing etc. I think Marmalade would have liked KID and been amused by him (Marmalade was always kind to Kittens after all in his colony.) I think Marmalade may have sent KID to me to help me through my dark and difficult times. That thought comforts me. As I am sure if you adopt another kitty, they will comfort you.

Kind regards,
James
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pinacoloda1
Thankyou all for your kind thoughts! You just do not know the pain of losing a companion animal until you've lost one. Many people don't understand the deep connection you have for your pet,saying"it's just a cat or just a dog,so get over it!",which makes it all the worse 'cause you are forced to "shoulder the grief" all by yourself😢 They just don't understand the unconditional love you and your pet shared.
But just to know there are people out there who DO
care,and some throgh experience or not,makes the burden I'm carrying a little lighter..
Bless you all for sharing my pain..
It's been about a month now since my Jack ran away,
I'm trying to work through my grief,it's been extremely hard. We only spent 1 year togather but ohhh so many.memories i keep thinking about over and over again,my tears are never ending..
I am adopting another cat soon,and i KNOW i will come to love him or her as i did,and still do,my Jack!
Because i believe there's always room for 1 more💓and the more animals you love,the bigger your heart grows☺
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