Lillymylove
Hi everyone just wondering if what I,m feeling is normal, it’s been over 10 months since we lost our beautiful girl Lilly and I still cry most days and still have her doggy bed on mine, I also can’t leave the house without a little ritual I have ( I won’t say what it is as you will all thinks I,m banana’s).
Anyways is anyone still going through what I am or should I have progressed further by now?
David 
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MAlcindor
Hi Lillymylove, it's been 6 weeks since my Max passed and 2 since Bailey so I cannot tell you how I will be feeling 9 months from now but if how I'm feeling is any indication I don't think you are alone. The grief is so deep that chances are we are always going to feel it, hopefully at a lesser degree. As for your ritual, I'm sure every single one of us can relate. Sometimes we do things that we think are strange but you would be surprised as to what other may be doing. We each use whichever coping mechanism works for us, and if others think it's weird, too bad. You have to do what's right for you.
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clevymd
I don't think there is "normal" for grieving.  I think it's personal, individual, and not something on which you can put a time.  It's been 3 weeks since Zoe and 2 since Jasmine, and the pain is still very sharp, I still am crying, and still feel awful sometimes.  I have posted a thread about the things I have been doing to help with my grief in this forum so won't repeat it here, and encourage you to take a look and share your thoughts.  I will note that one thing that has helped me a lot is looking back at photos where my girls were happy, like the one I have here of Zoe and Jasmine, sleeping together, warm and happy.  

37809397_10217279477163367_4416621106492866560_n.jpg 
Carole, Mom to Zoe, who crossed the bridge on 7/5/18, Jasmine, who crossed on 7/14/18, and Layla, on 12/1/18, all will forever be in my heart, and ongoing mom to Roxie.

https://www.rainbowsbridge.com/residents/ZOE085/Resident.htm
https://www.RainbowsBridge.com/residents/JASMI151/Resident.htm
https://www.rainbowsbridge.com/residents/LAYLA022/Resident.htm
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MyBabyX10
Not bananas! I go outside and look up at the sky in hopes of getting another glimpse, visit from him like I did the other day. I talk too my baby, I sleep with his favorite toy every night! We are supposed to get his ashes back tomorrow 😢😢😢💔💔💔!
DDS
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xxcesarxx
Its very normal, its been 5 months for me and i still cry everyday.
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xxcesarxx
My beloved Hercules.
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Rookiesmama
Lillymylove, definitely WON'T think you're bananas!! It's only been 10 days for me and I'm struggling greatly. I miss my boy so much, and can't believe he's gone (I only had 7 years). It's hard to look at his pictures and know exactly when it happened or see his toys next to his box. Just last night I moved his ashes, blanket, and toy from my dresser to my end table. Now he's closer to me. I really haven't been able to sleep, and I won't say I slept more last night, but what sleep I got somehow felt a little more restful. I like having my boy closer. Crazy maybe, but it's all part of this terrible journey we're all on. Sending you a hug Lilly!!

I forgot to add how much I love seeing everyone's pictures ❤❤ My Rookie lovebug destroying his football!
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camunki
what your feeling is normal, and we all grieve in different ways....I don't even think there is a "normal" way to grieve. I know I cried for the first 11 months, every single day....tears came down, even to this day I cry at least once a week and my beloved Jemma passed on....back on Oct 21, 2016. I am telling you, our babies hold a huge place in our hearts, and our hearts and mind take a toll thru this path we call grieving.

I think whatever you do each day, your ritual, is not bananas!!! I kiss the urn packet every single day when I wake up, that is the first thing I do...every day!! and I know i am not nuts!!

The pics you posted of your Lilly are ohhh so beautiful....keep looking for her and talking with her, she is still with you, on a new journey at the Rainbow Bridge.....your angel..........until you meet again.

Cam


 
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ourwonderfulkitty
about the rituals before leaving - that all makes sense to me -  its been just 6 weeks for me but I know I'll keep doing those before leaving/after coming home rituals for a long time -
I'd always go room to room and ask "Where's Katie" - and then when I found her, asleep in a chair or window or some other special place -
I'd say "Oh, there you are".  Did this both on leaving and coming home and many times thru the day, and it warms my heart now
just to think of that. 

Now am often wandering around, looking for her, denying that she is gone, and sometimes if I'm really lucky I see in my peripheral vision
what I know is her, and then I'm both glad but then also sad when my logical mind knows she is gone.

Well I better stop here, but wanted to let you know I think those rituals make sense and can be important in this process.
And my condolences to you as well.
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Lillymylove
Thanks everyone x x
David 
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PipersMother
Hi David, I am very sorry for your loss.  I don't think you are bananas at all. It's been 11 months since my Piper died and two months since Miranda died, and although my crying has eased up, I do still have their photos and their ashes in the corner of my bed. I sleep with them and have a little ritual where I kiss them good night and good morning every single day. I also carry around their blankets and snuggle with them all the time. 

In short, it sounds to me like your actions are normal and they represent the depth of your love and your pain. Grieving is different for everyone and every pet. I think we just need to do what feels good and whatever helps us stay connected to our fur baby.  Blessings to you and your sweet Lilly and the beautiful life she lived. 

 
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OmarR
David,

When I lost my Emma, I cried EVERYDAY for 18 months. After that, it started becoming maybe every other day. Sometimes it would go back to everyday, but for short periods of time.

As the others have mentioned, there is no "normal" when it comes to grieving, and there is definitely no "right or wrong" when it comes to grieving. As I type this to you, tears are coming down my face as I think about your loss, my loss, and the loss that others have to endure or will endure.

I am very, very sorry for your loss.
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Lillymylove
Thankyou so much omarR for your lovely words they mean so much I’m so sorry for your loss also take care
David 
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Lillymylove
Thank you everyone for your kind words and support, it does make me feel better knowing what I,m feeling is normal.
David 
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scampisdad
For us its been just over 3 months and we still talk and cry about our little girl Scampi nearly everyday.
Bill roberts
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