Imlost101
Sadly I had to let my beloved rescue dog go yesterday. She had taken unwell and had been in the vets since Thursday. I never expected this as I had only rehomed her two years ago..having lost my mum...getting a dog took me four years as I couldn't bare to love someone else. She found me and gave me a sense of belonging, purpose and comfort. My heart is breaking. I blame myself. Was there something I done? Did I hurt her? Why has this happened? Everyone came to know her just as much as me, every day was about her. I don't want to leave my house as I can't bare to come back and not see her at the window..I haven't gone to bed since Thursday because I can't go without her..I've lost dogs before but she was truly special
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helenbutcher
I feel for you.  We lost ours in Sep and we still miss her so very much.  It will get easier but take it day to day.
Helen Butcher
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Imlost101
Thank you for replying Helen.i had dogs pass before but only through old age. Lola was 6 and I only had her for 2. Those 2 years changed my life...what did you do that helped?
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Purzel
Zoe,
I am so sorry for your sudden and unexpected loss. This is heartbreaking and I can imagine what a shock this must have been for you. I am also sorry you've lost your mum. My heart goes out to you. Lola's loss is just so raw and there is nothing wise I can tell you. You found a very good place to talk about all you feel and all that comes to your mind. We all understand. You will find lots of comfort here as we have all lost our beloved fur babies and know how you feel. 
Silvia (with Max forever in my heart)

[hundi]


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SirRobyn0

Dear I'm Lost,
I was so close to Lucy when we had to have her put to sleep on 2-4-16.  Time has helped me to be able to focus more on the good times than the sad times.  A little over a month later we adopted another dog.  Though Millie could never replace Lucy, Millie gave me something new to focus on, and she let me cry all over her more than once.

I would say this.  What if you had never adopted Lola.  You would have never known the joy that she brought you.  That's a big thing, the joy that you two had, the fun you shared, and bond you built.  Remember that bond is still between you two, and it will always be there.  Try to remember the good stuff and not focus on her (I assume illness or injury) that took her life.  And remember that many years from now when the time is right you will see her again.  For now just grieve the way you grieve.  If it would help to leave the house for few days do so.  Take time off work if you want / need to.  If other people don't understand what you're going though don't make it you're problem you have enough to deal with.  For me after we put Lucy to sleep we took a little weekend trip to the coast which is a couple of hours away.  I just didn't want to be at home looking at the empty dog beds.

We are all here for you.  

Lucy's dog Daddy forever.

It is better to have loved your fur baby, and lost him or her to the rainbow bridge than to have never loved at all, for we will meet again.


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Imlost101
Thank you purzel.this is really tough. I still don't know what caused Lola to become unwell. I know we loved one another dearly...when I first visited the rehoming centre the staff told me she had just arrived having lost her owner...I felt an instant bond and from then we've been inseparable...this has shocked me...I've lost my whole sense of self....I look for meanings as to why this has happened hoping that there is some sense to it. Getting Lola was about me reconnecting after the loss of my mum. Finding a purpose to make me realise the beauty of being here..now I can't help but feel that she was taken from me.
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Imlost101
SirRobyn0 wrote:

Dear I'm Lost,
I was so close to Lucy when we had to have her put to sleep on 2-4-16.  Time has helped me to be able to focus more on the good times than the sad times.  A little over a month later we adopted another dog.  Though Millie could never replace Lucy, Millie gave me something new to focus on, and she let me cry all over her more than once.

I would say this.  What if you had never adopted Lola.  You would have never known the joy that she brought you.  That's a big thing, the joy that you two had, the fun you shared, and bond you built.  Remember that bond is still between you two, and it will always be there.  Try to remember the good stuff and not focus on her (I assume illness or injury) that took her life.  And remember that many years from now when the time is right you will see her again.  For now just grieve the way you grieve.  If it would help to leave the house for few days do so.  Take time off work if you want / need to.  If other people don't understand what you're going though don't make it you're problem you have enough to deal with.  For me after we put Lucy to sleep we took a little weekend trip to the coast which is a couple of hours away.  I just didn't want to be at home looking at the empty dog beds.

We are all here for you.  

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Imlost101
SirRobyn...your reply is beautiful...Thank you so much...there's a place I want to go..I had only recently found out about it and had hoped to take Lola over the weekend but unfortunately this happened.

I know that life is about experiences, one thing I know is that my meeting Lola, caring for Lola and her giving me her trust, is the best experience of my life..I have no regrets...

What helped you when considering another furbuddy?
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Pinkymd
Dear I’m Lost 101:
I lost My little miniature pincher Zeppelin two months ago. He just stopped eating & drinking & was finally diagnosed with kidney failure. The leaving the house but dreading to walk back into the house is My biggest crying spells so I put off going anywhere except to the grocery store when needed. Walking through the house thinking I’m going to turn around & He will be right behind Me is super hard to keep telling My brain He’s not there anymore. So I sympathize with what You’re going through. Each individual grieves differently. Some people tell Me I should be over losing Him by now. Get on with My life. Others say go get another dog. I just look at them thinking do they really know? Do they even get it? The bond I had with My Zeppelin was so very close. He was My little buddy. Like a family member. He showed Me love 24/7.... people just don’t understand. Just take one day at a time. That’s what I’m doing. I’ve had loving dogs in the past before Zeppelin so I know I will get through this loss of losing Him. It’s just so very hard. I’m so very sorry You lost Your Lola. Sending prayers Your way in hopes to comfort You.....
KA
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lonely
After I lost my beloved bebo girl I was so heartbroken and depressed I still am. She was my whole world my only family and my only happiness in life. I desperately wanted to know if animals have an after life. I searched the net every day and night searching for the answers. I was restless and wanted the reassurance that one day I will be able to see her again. All major religions don't say much on this topic than I read that in Islam there are true stories stated that when somebody will get to Paradise they will get whatever they want from god . As I'm a Muslim this gave peace to my mind and heart. Good thing is that you don't have to be a Muslim to go to paradise. As long as you believe in one God and the judgment day and do good deeds and no major sins you will go to paradise. And you can ask for your animal from God and anything else you want and you will get it. So just focus on being good human being and going to paradise and have faith in one god and the judgement day.
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Merlysmum
I lost my sweet little shih-poo Merlin just over 7 months ago and to be honest, I try not to think about him too often because I can't function when I think about how much I lost. We were soul mates, together 24/7 because I don't work due to anxiety and depression. He helped me through the death of my mum in 2011. I loved her deeply but compared to Merlin, I coped well with her passing. This is probably discouraging for those of you who have just lost your animals but, hopefully, you have supportive relatives and friends to help you through. Sometimes it is too much to bear. I never took him for a walk without someone commenting about how cute or friendly or good he was. He also trotted/bounced when he walked which was adorable. My roommate has cancer so I walk her Boston Terrier every day but it's a whole different thing than taking my own sweetie out. It's just exercise, although he's a nice enough dog. It has been two months since I have had to take my (additional) anxiety medication but I am starting to feel very shaky as the warm weather approaches. I really did revolve every aspect of my life around him which was stupid because when he was gone, I had nothing to live for. I have to believe I can overcome my grief at some point but today it all feels very fresh. I can't complain about the time I had with him - 15 wonderful years, the Merlin years, I call them. The good years. Sorry I went on for so long; your post really hit a nerve with me. Thank you for listening.
Joanne Brigden
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Mackysmum
Merlysmum i relate to you very much i completely devoted my life to my macky I did everything for him and always put him first over everything and every one.
I suffer from generalized anxiety disorder and also ocd , its hard isn't it on top of the grief.
I am lost like you cause i revole every aspect of my life around macky so I'm stuck with a weighted feeling of " what now " .
I'm really sorry you lost your soul mate im hoping time will heal us both .
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SirRobyn0
Imlost101 wrote:
SirRobyn...your reply is beautiful...Thank you so much...there's a place I want to go..I had only recently found out about it and had hoped to take Lola over the weekend but unfortunately this happened. I know that life is about experiences, one thing I know is that my meeting Lola, caring for Lola and her giving me her trust, is the best experience of my life..I have no regrets... What helped you when considering another furbuddy?


Sorry about the delay in getting back to you, I was called out of town for a bit.  What helped me in considering another furbuddy you asked.  

I suppose for me the biggest thing was knowing that while Lucy didn't like me giving affection to other dogs when she was alive I knew she wouldn't want me to be without after she was gone.  I also didn't like seeing her beds empty and her toys just sitting in the toy box.  Though I knew it would both a good thing, and difficult for me at the same time I knew it was the right thing to do.  Millie is a completely different personality Lucy, but we quickly made a bond.  When we adopted Lucy she was afraid of people, when we brought her home that evening she came to me while I was looking for something on the floor and she put her head on my should and just stood there while I petted her.  Why she picked me over one of the other people in the house I haven't clue, but it began our bond.  

It's sort of funny there is one person in the house that keeps late hours, but the night Millie came home I went to bed at 11pm, a mere 8 hours after Millie was dropped off at our house I went to bed, Millie got up off the bed in the living room and followed me into my bedroom.  I had to get a bed out for her which I laid on the floor on the other end of the room.  I shut the lights off and few minutes later I hear some noise and switch the light back on only to find Millie dragging her bed towards mine.  She didn't stop until she had her bed next to mine.  When she has slept every night since then. 

In Lucy's case I can only image that there must have been something about me she liked or needed.  In Millie's case I think she could tell how badly I was hurting from loosing Lucy.  I think that's why Millie stuck to me. 

I'm not sure if any of this helps you or if it even answers your question, but I do hope it helps.  
 
Lucy's dog Daddy forever.

It is better to have loved your fur baby, and lost him or her to the rainbow bridge than to have never loved at all, for we will meet again.


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Imlost101
It does help Robyn, thank you...when I got Lola to my house she jumped over a wall and fled...I got her back and thought...what have I gotten myself into..in the days after she tore the wood from the kitchen doors. I had to contact a dog behavioralust and they suggested that I let her pick a safe place...It was my room..

I got Lola from a rescue place. They said that she had lived with an elderly person who had passed and the family couldn't keep her..she also had to be secluded has she wasn't coping with the environment. Having lost my mum and feeling scared of life without my mum, I could resonate with Lola.

In the coming weeks she learnt to walk on a lead. One day I recall her whimpering after an elderly couple in the park...I always took that to mean that she lost something very dear to her.

However, within a few weeks that was us..bonded!!! Everything was about her...I got my house decorated often saying Lola needs a good home...in many ways my Lola rehomed me. The painter would laugh as the moment my car pulled into the street he said there was a loud thiud from Lola jumping from my bed and rushing down the stairs wailing with excitement...

I know that Lola enjoyed her time with me and similarly disliked me being with other dogs. I get a sense that she would want for me to embrace a dog again...she was such a gentle soul with great affection...I just want a sign to let me know when its right.
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catiebee
Your Lola sounds like a wonderful creature! You guys weathered a lot of adjustments early on--you must have been very patient. 

Wishing you peace and comfort, and much healing as the days go by.
Catie
-Missing Marissa deeply
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