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gizmosmom

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Posts: 5
Reply with quote  #1 
My cat Gizmo passed away yesterday.  It was so unexpected.  Over the weekend she started having a hard time breathing so Sunday night I brought her to the Animal Emergency Center.  She was kept on oxygen all night and I was told of the most likely grim outcome.  I transferred her to my vet yesterday morning.  The ride from the Emergency Center to the vet was so heartbreaking.  She was just gasping for air.  She got back on oxygen at the vet's office.  Xrays showed that her heart was almost 3 times it's normal size and she was in kidney failure.  She was only 7 years old.  I wanted to give her a chance but I could not stand to see her suffer anymore so I made the decision to have her euthanized.  I stayed with her - it was so heartbreaking.  I stayed with her for a long time afterwards too.  She was so beautiful.  The pain I feel I cannot even describe.  It literally hurts.  I cannot stop crying, I can't sleep or eat.  I just feel it is so unfair to her.  I adopted her from a rescue in April 2006.  She was a breeder cat who had a very hard life.  After I adopted her it took her a long time to come around but she blossomed into the sweetest cat.  All she wanted was some petting and to chase her little balls and light around and to be included whenever there was ice cream.  She would give little kisses when she wanted to be pet and would purr so loud the second we would touch her.  It's so unfair to her that the majority of her life was a living hell.  I do find comfort knowing that her last couple years with me she was well cared for and loved dearly, but this is the hardest thing I have ever endured.  I'm so glad to find this forum and to find others that are going through this too.
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sopsad

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Posts: 21
Reply with quote  #2 
GizMom,

We lost our sheepdog Sophie one week ago about 30 minutes ago on Tues, 11/17. She too had kidney failure and we decided that morning it was time. she 10+ yrs old and I prayed please get me thru the first week. Well G and I have made, not without tears and utter aching, but we've made it. You will too ..........so please hang in there and use this Forum as much as you can. Most everybody here has very similar stories and you can see how we all ache with you and will be here for you.

Take Care,

Mike - Sophie & Sadie's Upright Daddy
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Susie_Squillions

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Posts: 947
Reply with quote  #3 
Dear Gizmo's Mom,

I am so sorry to hear about your shocking loss.  The shock of a sudden loss, and of seeing them in such discomfort takes everything out of us, I know.  Bless you for rescuing her and for giving her a lifetime of love in the short time she was with you.  Because of you, she knew heaven on earth, and there is no better gift than that.  You are her Earth Angel, and now she is your special guardian fur angel.

The defining animal of my life was a wonderful cat named Bingo, whom we always referred to as King Bing, The God Cat.  He was a most magnificent beast.  He had Feline Hypertrophic Cardiomyopathy (DHC), which I suspect was Gizmo's condition.  We were extremely fortunate that he survived his diagnosis and that we had bonus time with him, thanks to the excellent and extensive critical care our vet provided and the fact that (I honestly believe) it was simply not his time to leave us yet.  The lessons he came to teach us were just beginning.

No matter when we lose them, it feels like our hearts have shattered into a million fragile pieces.  In fact, they are left intact, but battered and bruised.  Still, I know it feels like they will never heal.  I promise you that in time, yours will.  When it does, you will find that Gizmo is still safely tucked in that special place in your heart that was hers from the beginning.  She will never be more than a whisper away from you.  The bond you share with her is eternal. 

I can just picture Gizmo's arrival at the Rainbow Bridge, with Bingo being right there to greet her, telling her that he guide her to help you heal from this sorrowful time.  She is in the best of angel paws, I promise, and Bingo will help her send you gentle messages that she is always with you.

You and your beautiful Angel Gizmo are in my thoughts and prayers.  Please come back and share your stories of life with Gizmo and all the special ways she made your house a home.

xoxoxo



__________________
My heart is battered and bruised, but I will not let it break. It holds such precious cargo, I must protect it now. (Susie Squillions)

"Memories of loved ones are like songs in our soul." Margaret Wakeley

T.J.'S RESIDENCY:
http://RainbowsBridge.com/residents/TJ006/Resident.htm

BUDDY GUY AYRES~LYNCH'S RESIDENCY:
http://www.rainbowsbridge.com/residents/Buddy128/resident.HTM

KING BING THE GOD CAT'S RESIDENCY:
http://rainbowsbridge.com/residents/BINGO009/Resident.htm

In one of the stars, I shall be living.
In one of them, I shall be laughing.
And so it will be as if all the stars were laughing when you look at the sky at night.
~ The Little Prince, Antoine de Saint-Exupery
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gizmosmom

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Posts: 5
Reply with quote  #4 
Thank you so much for your kind words.  I researched Cardiomyopathy and I agree with you - I think that is what she had.  A couple weeks ago she had an episode where she was having a really hard time using her back legs and I see that was a symptom too.  The Emergency Center diagnosed her with Pleural Effusion, which can be caused by Cardiomyopathy too.  By this time it was too late for her.  The fluid drained was sent to a lab and I should be getting the results within the next day or so.  Thank you again - it is so nice to have a place where I can talk about this.
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jasminesmom

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Reply with quote  #5 
gizmosmom
I am so sorry for the unexpeceted loss of your beloved Gizmo. My Jasmine greeted her at The Bridge.

My thoughts and prayers are with you today.

Cheryl and Angel Jasmine

__________________
Cheryl and Angel Jasmine
Jasmine was loved
Jasmine was given ProIn
Jasmine is now gone
http://RainbowsBridge.com/residents/JAMIN001/Resident.htm
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gizmosmom

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Posts: 5
Reply with quote  #6 
Thank you so much.  I went back to work today to try to get my mind off of everything.  I was actually able to talk about her today without breaking down but as soon as I got to my hotel I lost it.  This forum has helped me alot just seeing other stories of grieving parents that I can relate with.

Tiki - what was the cause of Havana's broken skin?  That is so sad.  I'm so sorry.
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tikidikidoo

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Posts: 46
Reply with quote  #7 

I believe she suffered from fragile skin syndrome. From what I've been able to learn it is quite rare in cats. Particularly in cats as young as her. The vet believes it was a further complication of her disease. It helped me to post her story here, in the moment, but I'm afraid I had to remove it for now. Though I believe this is a safe place I feel very protective of her and her memory. It was tragic and very scary what happened to my little Havana. I will never forget her. I'm very sorry for your loss.

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gizmosmom

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Reply with quote  #8 
I'm so sorry for your loss Tiki.  This is so sad - just remember she is not suffering anymore. It is very hard losing our beloved babies.  I started to feel a little better - to the point where I wasn't crying all day but last night and today so far have been hard.  I put up my Christmas tree and decorations last night and everything reminds me of her - the tree skirt that she used to sleep all day on, her stocking, her and my other cat playing with the tree branches as I put up the tree.  I can't stop crying again.  I'm glad I have my other baby still but I just miss her and her quirky little things she did.  I went to the library yesterday and got a few books about losing a pet and grieving.  I'm hoping these will help.
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tikidikidoo

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Posts: 46
Reply with quote  #9 
Thankyou for your kindness. I know just what you mean. You think you are coming to terms with the grief you feel and then all of a sudden it sneaks up on you again. I have lost beloved animal friends before but this situation is very new to me and I am having a very difficult time coming to terms with it. Havana went from well to gravely ill so quickly that I think I'm still in a state of shock. From the moment I met her I felt a very strong connection to her. I have met many cats over the years, volunteering at the shelter and have love for each and every one but with Havana it was different somehow. We had a very strong, spiritual connection. The loss of her has left a huge hole in my heart. Through her illness and all the force feeding and pills she remained, always, so sweet, brave, and forgiving. She was an incredible life force. I believed with 100% of my heart that I could make her well enough to enjoy a quality of life here in our home for however long we may have had. I was warned many times that she may not have a long life but I was not prepared for her end to come so soon. I will always be haunted with the questions and uncertainty I feel surrounding her illness and eventual death. I can only hope now that she knew I did what I did because I believed it was in her best interest. She was such a brave, stoic patient. I am floating in an abyss of grief, regret, and uncertainty. I know most people do not understand how a little black cat, that I knew for such a short time, could affect me so profoundly. I've learned to not worry much of what other people think. I will do what I need to do to grieve for her and honour her memory.
I'm glad to learn that you do have another cat to provide you comfort. In my times of intense grief over all my lost babies the only place I find true comfort is when I am in the company of the rest of my 4 legged family. They can never replace the one that is lost but they can help to ease the hurt. Your beloved Gizmo also left you suddenly and long before she rightfully should have. This is so unfair and brings along with it feelings of anger as well as sadness. She had a hard life before she found you and I hope you can someday take comfort in the fact that she died knowing that she was dearly loved and will be sorely missed. Every animal deserves the same respect but many do not get it. You did the best you could for her and that makes you a hero in my eyes. In time your sorrow will grow into fond memories of your times together. This cannot be rushed. It happens in it's own time. Thankyou for saving her and showing her that humans are capable of extending our love to all who share this planet with us. My love and thoughts are with you through this very difficult time.
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